Forgiveness can be hard work, especially when someone doesn't try to make amends. But it is possible to forgive even when a person hasn't asked to be forgiven.
Here's how:
1. Remove ourselves from the equation.
Instead of looking through our own lens, let's try to see this person as a devoted mother would see her child -- the good, the bad, and the ugly. From this perspective, we can see the complete person, flawed and flailing, but we can love this person anyway.
This allows us to see others the way God sees us -- Beloved. And worthy of that love.
2. List their positive qualities.
No one is ALL bad. Let's find the good. Focus on the good. Celebrate the good. And release the rest. That's true strength and resiliency, and we're all the better for taking the high road.
3. Think happy thoughts.
Yes, someone has hurt us terribly. And there's no excuse for the harm they have done. But let's consider how they may have contributed to our life in a positive way. Even if it is a very small thing.
This won't be simple in many cases. Maybe a parent abandoned us or a loved one betrayed us. Maybe someone abused us. Maybe they don't deserve our forgiveness at all.
But here's the thing: Forgiveness is not about them. It's about us. It's a very important tool we can use to protect our own hearts from turning cold like theirs.
There's a reason forgiveness is the basis of every faith. It's because forgiveness is, indeed, a gift that saves us.
Today, I dare you to reclaim your own power. Don't allow another person to harden your heart. Be strong, be kind, be the light. Forgive.
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