THE BLOG

When Your Sense of Security Is Gone

03/04/2014 03:41 pm ET | Updated May 04, 2014

In life, we each experience hard times, tough times, times that cause us to dig deep within ourselves. How do we find the ability to dig deep after experiencing something so hard? How after enduring the hardest moments in our lives do we find a way to overcome, to rise above? That is called resiliency. The ability to go through your own personal hell, pick yourself up, dust yourself off and carry on. It's by no means easy, however, it is necessary. We get through the toughest times and come out on the other side because the human condition is to move forward. We were taught from a very young age that life does go on, that the world does, in fact, keep on spinning -- with or without us.

When you experience something so traumatizing, so hard, something so unbelievably difficult, something that takes your control from you: how do you then get it back? I know that you can relate: You are in a car accident. You're robbed at gunpoint. Your dog dies. A crime of any magnitude is committed against you. Your control has been taken. You feel powerless, completely out of control -- lost. The question then is, how do you get it back? The first step is realizing that you alone hold the power. Is the event going to define you? Are you going to let it hold the power? Are you going to give in, give up? This is where your resiliency comes in. You must take the control back.

Resiliency is a powerful tool. For resiliency allows you to take your control back. It allows you to say, "This happened to me, but this does not define me." Like everything in life, nothing is permanent, not pain, not joy, not anything. With this realization, or perhaps, with this understanding and acceptance of, you are able to embrace the fact that the hardship or pain you experienced will not last. It, too, will in fact, pass.

It's not to say that you will come out unchanged, or unscathed, but you will come out on the other side. You will carry on. You will once again be able to see the abundant good that lives alongside the "bad" you just went through. The good will eventually begin to outweigh and even overcome the bad.

So, how do you get there? How do you gain your control back when your sense of security is gone? You believe. You believe that it is within your control. You believe that good will prevail once again. You believe that the world is continuing on and that you want to be a part of it. And with that, with that resiliency, you get back your power. Resiliency you see, begins with your belief that you are the one in power after all.

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