We have all had that first love. Whether we were teenagers or adults, at some point we experienced the heady rush of first love usually combined with a huge dose of lust and sexual energy.
But was it really love? What if the feelings we all assume are our first love are nothing more than the awakening of our sexual side? What if we have mistaken those feelings of infatuation for the feelings of true love?
It is easy to do. You all of a sudden become the focus of someone else's world. You spend all your waking time with them or thinking about them. Your world now revolves around the person you think you are in love with.
With immaturity on our side we believe that these overwhelming feelings must be love. From that point on, rightly or wrongly, this is the guide that we use to judge being in love.
Every subsequent relationship is measured against our first love. The chemistry, the feelings and the behavior -- all of it comes down to one question "does it make us feel like the first one did?" If not, does that mean it is not true love? Are we walking away from what might be the best love of our lives because it doesn't measure up to something in our past?
A strong and lasting love doesn't just happen. That is lust! A love that lasts a lifetime takes work, commitment and a huge dose of reality thrown in.
The following are the five steps you need to take to find a love that can endure all that life throws its way:
- We need to stop comparing a current relationship with a past one. Doing so robs our future of having the opportunity to present us with the most amazing experiences. We judge everything that comes our way on something in our past instead of judging it on the here and now. Instead of looking at it with our more mature outlook and knowledge we keep referring back to the past. The past didn't work out so well yet we refer to it as our template or guide for the future.
The unconditional love that comes from the synchronicity of two people who live in the here and now is truly life changing. Are you giving your relationship the chance it deserves?