I have a great counselor, coach, therapist all wrapped up into one cool package, Dino Paris. He helps me catch my shit and dispose of the stinky pile. We have gone the journey together to get my story written as I want it read. I am in constant edit mode. I have used the EMDR method with Dino to clean out some crap and bring in fantastic new happenings in all arenas of my precious life. Actually, within hours of my first session, an obstacle that terrorized my life was removed rather simply. It was like the poof of the magician wand and tada, the challenge disappeared. I am not sure what happened but I am in; all in with the alternative healing ways and means in which Dino invites me to participate.
Recently, he offered a new map to exit out of one of my detours into a ditch. Ho'oponopono. It is simple. I tried it and it really works. We do not need the Hawaiian surf or volcanoes oozing lava to reap the rewards of this ancient Island spiritual tradition. And so it goes:
I am Sorry.
Please Forgive Me.
Thank you.
I love you.
This is it. Either to yourself or out loud declaring and meaning these clean simple words will yield edits in your story and peace in your heart. You can say them to yourself, your higher self, God, your dog (god spelled forward in my book), to the stinker that is bugging you, the Universe, the ketchup stain on your refrigerator shelf, just give it a go no matter the receiver of your declaration to change. Repeat. Repeat. Check in with yourself at the end of the day. How do you feel? Repeat even if Nothing has happened yet. It will. The slate of your ongoing song on skip 'issues' will wipe clean.
Problems will resolve. Best of all the perspectives about the stories we tell ourselves, soften with this mantra. We heal our selves and thus inspire the healing of others and the 'story' evaporates.
When I feel fierce and defensive I also feel narrow and brittle. If I have a breathe of mindfulness left in me at this juncture, I take a pause from my backed up the wall stance (yes I know this is not easy to do), I grasp onto the HoPo mantra to rescue me from myself. This helps to get back to a positive perspective without yielding to what is actually bothering us. When we are sincere in wishing to ease the pain of our hate, our anger at ourselves, our situations, and others, it can evaporate. We must truly wish for our angst to transform, though. Sometimes we want to hang onto our pissed off ness because we want assurance that 'they' get what they did to mess our life up. Keep the negative bottled up if you need to and see how that serves your sense of peace and joy. When you are ready, take a deep breath in. Or two. Recite these words slowly:
I am Sorry.
Please Forgive Me.
Thank you.
I love you.
Let the four phrases blanket you and your pain. Let them seep into your system. You will feel better.
The tight grip that anger holds us hostage feels so very Just when we are furious or hurt. You are welcome to return to that just route anytime. Just give this a go. HoPo is not ok-ing what 'they' did. Ho just offers space for you to be filled up with positive feelings. This process helps clear the fog that hurt can immerse us in. I have found that the 'other' sweetens up when I do. This happens like magic, through the air, though my heart, I do not really Get how, but it does. My perspective shifts and seems to shift the polarity that is messing with my glorious life. It is as if 'they' got it: the love, the forgiveness, the thanks, the apology. And we Get it, also. This is love in pure form.
More on the magic of Ho if you are interested in digging in deeper:
Who knows what my counsel will come with next time we collaborate on project Kay. For now, for today, it is this simple powerful mantra:
I am Sorry.
Please Forgive Me.
Thank you.
I love you.