Recently I accidentally came out of the closet.
Now before the rumor mill begins buzzing I don't mean that closet (although thanks to my height, in TV makeup I've probably been mistaken for a drag queen more times than I care to count, but that's another blog post.) I'm referring to the other closet that many childless, career-oriented, single women find themselves boxed in: that of a closeted feminist.
I didn't even know that I was in the closet until I mentioned via social media that I had attended a screening of the terrific new HBO documentary on feminist icon Gloria Steinem, Gloria: In her Own Words. A self-professed fan of mine expressed "surprise" and later horror that I would identify with that "feminist stuff" considering how (allegedly) detrimental it has been to society.
I initially assumed he was joking. After all, I write about women's issues so much that during a recent interview about my new book (shameless plug alert) The GQ Candidate, a reporter asked me if I consider myself first and foremost a women's issues writer. I had never given the matter much thought, explaining that I write about issues that I find interesting and consider important. As a woman it's probably not a coincidence that a number of those issues affect women, among them reproductive rights, a topic I care a great deal about and have stated that I consider one of the most important political issues of our time. (Click here to see a list of the most high profile black feminist leaders.)
But as I noted on The Dylan Ratigan Show, my "fan's" criticism spurred some reflection on my part. I don't know that I have used the "f-word" once in any of my writing -- except to describe other people like Steinem -- but never to describe myself.
Conscious choice on my part? Definitely not. Subconscious choice? Well now I wonder.
According to a 2005 CBS News survey, though 69% of women polled believe that the women's movement has definitely made their lives better, nearly the same number -- 70% to be exact -- said that they do not consider themselves feminist. This despite the fact that a plurality of those polled still believe there are greater advantages to being a man in society than to being a woman. I assume that like my so called "fan" many of the women polled don't actually know the actual definition of the word feminist or feminism, which according to Merriam Webster is "the theory of the political, economic, and social equality of the sexes."
Gee. Isn't that controversial sounding? Who would want to stand for that? (Sarcasm, in case you missed it.)
And yet as we see from the Steinem documentary, the word "feminist" has long been used as a pejorative by those opposed to the feminist movement's primary goal of gender equality. I guess it was easier for equal rights opponents to vilify the movement by exploiting people's ignorance of the true meaning of a funny-sounding new word. So they were able to successfully hijack it, and turn it into a synonym for man-hating, unattractive, angry, witch. (Which I guess would make the feminist movement a covenant. If so, pass me my broom.) "Witch" certainly makes a better political target than say, freedom fighter.
So perhaps the poll (and subconsciously my own writing) reflect the notion that even among those who support feminism's goals, there's a lingering fear that the word is so radioactive that using it may hamper our efforts to advance a feminist agenda, on reproductive rights or anything else.
But I'm beginning to wonder if this has become a self-defeating prophecy. So many of us who have benefited from the feminist movement, and continue to believe in its goals, have become afraid to use "the f-word" -- consciously or not -- so the idea of "feminist" as a bad word lives on generations after the movement first began. (I will say for the record that I do believe that some of feminism's more high profile voices bear some of the blame for younger women's fear of "the f-word." The politics of "with us or against us" are rarely effective at persuading converts, and unlike some feminists I don't believe that a woman choosing to pose in a men's magazine, or a man choosing to buy one, makes either one of them any less of a feminist than myself.)
The way I see it, the only way for us to stop f-word panic is for more of us to come out of the closet.
Allow me to do just that: My name is Keli, and I'm a feminist.
Keli Goff is the author of The GQ Candidate and a Contributing Editor for TheLoop21.com, where this post originally appeared.
www.keligoff.com
Follow Keli Goff on Twitter: www.twitter.com/keligoff
Marlo Thomas: Gloria Steinem... the Icon, the Girlfriend
Sheryl Sandberg: Gloria Steinem, Looking Back And Moving Forward
Marcia G. Yerman: Gloria: In Her Own Words -- A Life in Activism
Marianne Schnall: Exclusive Interview With Gloria Steinem: In Her Own Words
Gloria Steinem - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia
Gloria Steinem Biography - Biography.com
Gloria Steinem calls for boycott of NBC's 'The Playboy Club ...
That's why I'd like to see society ditch the f-word and just be in favour of equal rights. Then men can feel more comfortable joining us too in being 'egalitarians'. (Really, ladies, do you want to call *yourselves* 'masculinists? Then why ask the boys to be 'feminists'?)
Opponents of feminism can't hurt it nearly as much as the movement's extreme elements, and ugly responses many legitimate feminists get when they call out those extremists for their behavior (all in the name of putting unity before values). Add to that the fact that equality means fighting for changes when men are being wronged too, and the label of 'feminist' inherently excludes male issues. It's kinda hard to find a decent label for those of us that support equality for both genders (gender egalitarian takes so long to type...).
What Novae said. Sharp as a razor.
http://youtu.be/UbK2sJzqnzU
http://youtu.be/OvMvtacEuFk
By now, these facts shouldn’t be hard to grasp. Almost 70 percent of black children are born to single mothers. Those mothers are far more likely than married mothers to be poor, even after a post-welfare-reform decline in child poverty. They are also more likely to pass that poverty on to their children. Sophisticates often try to dodge the implications of this bleak reality by shrugging that single motherhood is an inescapable fact of modern life, Not so; it is a largely low-income—and disproportionately black—phenomenon. The vast majority of higher-income women wait to have their children until they are married. The truth is that we are now a two-family nation, separate and unequal—one thriving and intact, and the other struggling, broken, and far too often African-American.
Feminism convinces women that raising their children is a burden instead of a biological necessity to teach your children how to think and see the world. Liberalism gives you welfare with the stipulations that the black man shouldn't be in the home. Now we have an imbalance in the home between men and women that other races don't have.
The feminist movement has achieved its aims and now seeks higher status for women than for men.western societies have developed a moral blind spot toward disparaging males.
... What? O_o
If you believe that your daughter is capable of being anything she wants when she grows up-well, you're a feminist.
If you believe that a woman has the ability to decide for herself, whether to go to college, work outside the home and/or decide to be a homemaker and how many children (if any) she will have-sorry, you're a feminist
I guess there's a lot more of us than you thought-huh?
The reason for the feminist label is to prioritize attention to female issues. The problem is you end up ignoring everyone else's issues in the process. Be a humanist and embrace us all.
Yes, it is self-defeating that women do not identify themselves as feminists or with a concerted effort for gender equality --social, political, economic, reproductive, health equality for women.
Let's reclaim the power in the name and renew the effort to support other women in the workplace, at home, as entrepreneurs...
You would have men supporting women,
women supporting women,
but nobody supporting men...
That is the world our boys have to grow in and it's not fair. If women insist all women should be feminist then men should all be masculinity and we can make it a fair fight. Women are already half the managers in America and more than half the work force. Young women are better educated and earn more than young men. For some reason only women getting ahead suppose to matter because our sons are the patriarchy right?
Women make up half of all managers and 24% of senior management. Those numbers will keep going up because women are getting more degrees than men by a wide margin. They have achieved parity in law and medical school. This will all keep going even if every feminist organization shut it's doors tomorrow because the society and culture have changed radically in very short time.
Constantly painting women as the underdog is not helpful especially for our young men who know how untrue that really is. When they go to a college with 60% women they know where they really stand. In fact they knew in high school because most of those at the top of the class are female.
At this point if women keep organizing to promote females then men are going to have to do the same just to compete. Then we will be competing gender rivals fighting for supremacy and dominance instead of equal partners who want the best for both our male and female children.
Here are some recent statistics published this spring in the McKinsey & Company study sponsored by the Wall Street Journal on Unlocking the Potential of Women in the US Economy:
According to Sylvia Hewlett, founder of the Center for Work-Life Policy, women represent 53% of new hires. Catalyst estimates that at the very first step in career advancement—when individual contributors are promoted to managers—the number drops to 37%. Climbing higher, only 26% of vice presidents and senior executives are female and only 14% of the
executive committee, on average, are women. At this point women are doubly handicapped because, as our research of the largest U.S. corporations shows, 62% are in staff jobs that rarely lead to a CEO role; (in contrast, 65% of men on executive committees hold line jobs.) This helps explain why the number of women CEOs in Fortune 500 companies appears stuck at 2-3%.
While our data shows that women—even mothers—retain strong conviction about their abilities and a desire to advance, when they look at the odds of making it through the pipeline, many make a well- reasoned decision: They stay put, look for a job elsewhere that will fulfill their ambition, or seek careers outside large corporations.
Because they are naive, just like the lost little girl in the Wizard of Oz, who did not understand why no one would play with her. Instead, they were doing hard chores to prepare for her to inherit. They were nest building, (just as the black men of the 1960s were nest building; but their hard work was taken for granted. e.g : black men have been the least and last to benefit from the very equality/civil rights movement they created, while everyone else has benefited!
So the girls naively thought they were being taken for granted, and "ran away" and got caught up in the witchcraft of Feminism. And just like the lost little girl who was trapped in the mysterious Land of Oz, had to choose if she was a "good witch or bad witch", black women will also have to decide and take sides on whether Feminism is good or bad for them. They have had 25 years to make up their minds about this. Instead, black women believe the white Women's Liberation propaganda, and think they are being "saved" from some mythical oppression of house work.
Black Feminism is based on Deception, Misperception & False Propaganda !It has also caused black women to view black men with contempt. Feminism is the dangerous social cancer today.It is not just ruining women, it is destroying the family foundation and the whole society.
Get some counseling.
But GJ with the whole blatantly stereotyping people by gender thing. It's always amazing when I run into someone like you...it's like Poe's law: a parody of a hate-filled sexist is indistinguishable from the real thing.
I'm thinking that Michael isn't the only one who needs counseling...
I hope her "feminist" sensibilities continue to grow and that teenage-hood doesn't turn her into a boy worshipping doormat.
Any suggestions for the father of an 11 year old girl to help her realize the possibilities of an equal life?
That put me squarely in the feminist camp by the time I was twelve - because outside my home I could see that I was treated differently, and why.
As long as she is a smart, encouraged young lady with support, it's only a temporary thing.
Thanks.