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Ken Levine

Ken Levine

Posted: July 30, 2007 12:53 PM

Dropping the F-C-C Bomb


WARNING: This post contains offensive letters of the alphabet!

The FCC is so concerned about protecting the public from indecency that it doles out huge fines for swear words that accidentally go out over the air. And God forbid for one nanosecond America sees Janet Jackson's breast. Our whole nation could collapse. If terrorists really want to bring down this country they should organize suicide streakers.

Meanwhile, for a yet-unbuilt low-power digital television station in Wailuka, Maui the FCC recently approved the call letters KUNT. This is not a joke! This is actually true! (I sure hope they don't plan on being an affiliate for the Lifetime Network or Oxygen.) Yes, those call letters were deemed acceptable by the federal decency police.

The same station group applied for and received the call letters KWTF for a station in Arizona. Anyone who has ever typed an email knows what WTF means. You're probably thinking it now just reading this post.

The President of KM communications, who requested and received those two call letters has since backed-off and will name his stations something more appropriate (KOCK? KLIT? KUM? Maybe KY-JL?)

The KM Prez insists it was a mistake and at the time he didn't realize those call letters he applied for were offensive. KUNT doesn't just sorta jump out at you? Was he pronouncing it Koont?

Outside of Aspen, Colorado there is KCUF, which is the F-word in reverse. They've been on the air since December. Thankfully no one with high moral standards is dyslexic. Otherwise, KCUF would be in deep TIHS.

They say their slogan is "Keeping Colorado Uniquely Free". Sure. That's why they had to have those particular call letters. Just like KUNT could stand for "Kall you next Tuesday." Who TF are we kidding here?

I once worked for WDRQ in Detroit and used to call the station W-dreck. Dreck is Yiddish for shit. The three Jews who listened to that station were hysterical.

The Code of Federal Regulations allows applicants to request call letters of their choice as long as the letter combination is available. But here's the kicker -- "objections to the assignment of requested call signs will not be entertained at the FCC."

No, but you can complain, and the station will probably be heavily fined if someone inadvertently utters "tit" on KUNT.

It's also okay for only three or four major corporations to own all the radio and TV stations in the country. And if the Federal Communication Commission had its way, all internet radio stations -- the only true voice of the individual -- would pay such outrageous royalties that they would be forced out of existence.

No wonder no station is named K-FCC. Those three letters are the most offensive of all.

You can read more from Ken at kenlevine.blogspot.com