I frequently get asked if my counseling practice slows down during the holidays. The answer is no. The holiday season is notorious for being a stressful time, and my clients can attest to that. Expectations are sky-high, schedules are jam-packed and family members get testy as a result of all the togetherness. Feelings of loneliness and grief are amplified. Even I can feel bogged down by my mile-long To-Do list -- it doesn't exactly put me in the holiday spirit.
When my husband and I started a family, I assumed that my babies would hand me a one-way ticket to holiday bliss. I couldn't wait to introduce them to all of the little traditions that I remembered from my childhood. They clearly did not feel the same urgency that I did. In spite of the calendar indicating that it was a very special day, my boys still required naps, still got the sniffles, still had nuclear meltdowns and still got into squabbles. I quickly realized that I needed to simplify the holidays more than ever in order to maximize enjoyment and minimize stress.
When you are a new parent, here are some things you might want to just say NO to:
- Rushing back and forth between separate family events on the same day.
I'm going to insert a big UNLESS here. Say 'no' to all of the above UNLESS one or more of the activities bring you joy. For instance, if you are a superb cook and truly enjoy preparing a massive feast, invite everyone over and do your Julia-Child-thing. I, on the other hand, would much rather kick my feet up on the sofa with some spiked eggnog and A Christmas Story playing in the background. My point? Say 'yes' to what makes you happy and 'no' to anything that sounds draining. You have my permission.
Other things to consider just saying YES to:
- Structuring your schedule around your baby's sleeping and eating routines so you don't have a grumpy monster of a child the rest of the holiday.
Kirsten Brunner, MA, LPC is a Licensed Professional Counselor and eggnog-loving mother of two rambunctious boys in Austin, TX. She and her blog partner, Cheryl Sipkowski, MS, LPC, provide sanity-saving tips and workshops for expectant and new parents at Baby Proofed Parents. Follow BPP on Facebook or Twitter for real-time tips and humor to help you "bring sane to baby brain."