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Kristen Houghton

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Happy at Work Number One Tip - Don't Gossip

Posted: 03/19/10 01:08 PM ET

A good friend of mine was starting a new job and asked me what one crucial tip I could give him to ensure a happy worry-free work environment. I told him the one crucial tip I would give him had two parts: First, be careful what you say; second, be careful to whom you say it. In other words, don't gossip!

That is professionalism and the advice can make for a much happier work place.

Nothing impacts your happiness quotient more adversely than being in a job environment where you are miserable for over eight hours a day five days a week. The daily demands of a position that may or may not be your dream job are difficult enough; being in a hostile environment can make it 100 times worse.

Gossip in all workplaces is, unfortunately, something that you can't entirely avoid. You will hear all kinds of things said about the people who work there, some true, some not. Making a personal decision not to repeat what you hear not only makes you a nicer person, it can make your job a more pleasant place to be. Being seen as someone who is isn't part of the gossip mill has its own rewards. It adds to your aura of professionalism.

The same advice is true if a co-worker vents to you about your mutual boss and asks your opinion, fully expecting you to agree. Be careful. If someone, in anger, makes cutting remarks about a supervisor, your best bet is to say nothing. As much as you may feel that the boss truly is an idiot with an ego the size of Cleveland, never say so. You have no way of knowing if your words will reach the ears of a third party who may just mention what you said to Mr./Ms. Cleveland Ego. If you don't get outright fired, your work life will become very unpleasant to say the least.

The same advice about gossiping in the office holds true outside the workplace. No matter how much you may want to join in during a 'dissing' session about a co-worker or boss at lunch or after hours, don't. Remember that words cannot be taken back. Once they're out there they are remembered, sometimes embellished, and have a way of coming back to haunt you at the most inopportune times. Words are weapons too.

Think about what harm you might be doing to your career or even to a much-needed temporary job. You should also be aware that if you intend to stay in the same field, information about you, good and bad, travels very easily by word of mouth, texting, emails, and even SKYPE. When you are careful of what you say, and to whom you say it, you are practicing a self-preservation mechanism that will make your professional life an easier and happier one.

A wonderful example of professionalism in a competitive market is Diane Sawyer. She is successful not only for her expertise in the field of journalism but also because she is known as someone who can be counted on to be discreet.

On your road to personal happiness, it pays big dividends to make the path as smooth as possible and avoid creating unnecessary potholes. Avoid gossip.

copyright 2010 Kristen Houghton
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06:37 PM on 03/31/2010
I'm sure gossip hinders the work environment, but there are some other really great principles out there that teach us how to be happy at work. Take female CEO Denice Kronau for example. She explains it all with much better detail in her book, (not sure when it is coming out). The idea is that we over-work ourselves, or hinder ourselves from being productive and Happy. Denice experienced the work lows, but created a way for her to Love her life again, and love her work.
http://www.denicekronau.com/about-denice/
11:07 PM on 03/19/2010
Amen. I am 8 months into a new job and am floored at the gossiping that goes on at my job. I could have said numerous things to "join in" but have kept my mouth shut and am damn glad I did as the amount of secrets that get told are AMAZING

I know things about other people that I should not know and I didnt ask anyone to tell me these.
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Kristen Houghton
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12:27 PM on 03/20/2010
I have had the same experience. In one place there was so much gossip that I found it unpleasant to go to work every day. I knew things about co-workers that I really did not want to know.