12/06/2013 05:49 pm ET | Updated Feb 05, 2014

#Baseltalk: Overheard at Art Basel

"So this Mandela guy that died -- can you like pull up a picture of him, I don't know who he is."

"We're thinking of expanding into Latin America."

"Ummm they don't even have Uber here."

"I don't get it." (Overheard 30 times.)

"I could do that." (Overheard 30 times.)

"I hate these people." (Overheard 30 times.)

"I don't think I've been sober since I landed in Miami."

"...And then she had the audacity to tell me I wasn't on the VIP List? Clearly she lives under a rock."

"If I hear the fucking word pop up again I'm gonna kill myself."

"What's the name of that dudes bar on Bowery?"

"Just take a Molly and be happy."

"If you're not buying a fucking Maserati than let's go."

"Is that guy being cuffed?"

"This is just too much for me...The atmosphere here is so mundane."

"I think I saw him on Tinder."

"Every woman in here is on Tinder."

He says, "I wish I could rock a blouse."

"I'm with the press. I write for the Huffington Post."

"The tent opens at 1:00 a.m."

"Notice how the light shimmers off the egg tarts."

"I should have stayed at home and watched the Sound of Music."

"Anna Wintour, yeah I've heard of her."

"Can we just get through one day without saying Kanye?"

"She's Latin right? What's her name? Martinez? Hernandez? Gonzalez?"

"I don't have an invite, I'm ON the invite."

"I don't do RSVP's."

"At Art Basel, even the traffic is pretentious."

Please COMMENT with your Basel Eaves-Droppings!