Say It Ain't So, Elizabeth -- You Knew But Supported His Run For President?

cross posted at My Left Wing

"You do it yourself, that's what really hurts..." - Radiohead, Just

As I write this, we're just a couple of hours into the official mainstream media phase of the John Edwards scandal and I'm already surprised. Something has happened that I didn't anticipate.

I've lost respect for Elizabeth Edwards.

As I've said previously, I admired both of the Edwards prior to this. Like most people I especially liked and admired Elizabeth Edwards. Even when I believed that Edwards was hiding something, I assumed Elizabeth was a victim. Now, that's changed.

The John Edwards interview -- which he states will be his very last comment on the subject -- hasn't aired yet but we do have a statement from Elizabeth Edwards. Ironically (to me, anyway) she posted it on the popular liberal blog The Daily Kos. The one upshot from her statement is that she knew about Edward's affair prior to his run for office.

I'm not assuming bad motives. I believe that the Edwards are both sincere in their stated positions about poverty, health care and other issues. I can even believe that the reason they wanted Edwards to become president was to promote that agenda. To the extent that's true, I totally agree with their ends but their means were so shortsighted, reckless, and potentially damaging to their own agenda that they can't be ignored.

Just taking the Edwards current statements at their words, I am left with a very uncomfortable truth -- both John and Elizabeth Edwards cynically used their marriage as a means to help John Edwards win an election. Right now, they are hoping that the emotional goodwill that they built up from their supporters will carry them through.

I'm sure I'll get some angry comments here but if you're an Edwards supporter, let me put this bluntly; if you gave John and Elizabeth Edwards time, money, support, or goodwill, they played you.

They made a conscious decision to make their relationship a focus throughout the campaign. That emotional goodwill you feel for them? They not only let you feel, they took actions and made statements specifically so you would feel it.

Then when the rumors first surfaced, they made the worst decision of all; they decided to lie about it and to keep lying about it for months. They lied in a way that made the people who were telling the truth look like the real liars. They lied in a way that turned their supporters into attack dogs. They only started to tell the truth when John Edwards was caught at the Beverly Hills Hilton and even now both John and Elizabeth Edward are calling the people who caught him the liars. That's the definition of shameless.

It didn't have to be that way.

I am fully convinced that if there was just a short affair with Rielle Hunter in 2006, John Edwards could have run for President eventually. Just not in 2008. Elizabeth Edwards shouldn't have supported his bid for the White House and she especially shouldn't have helped him promote the story about what a great husband he was. Elizabeth Edwards as a wife, friend, and adviser should have told her husband emphatically and in no uncertain terms to wait and to get the story of the affair out in the open as soon as possible.

Imagine if the affair story had been revealed back in early 2007. Some people, myself included, wouldn't have cared much in the first place. Others would have forgiven Edwards an affair in four or eight years, especially if Edwards filled that time with good works and devotion to his family.

Because I believe in the Edwards agenda, I still want to believe in the Edwards as people. Right now, though, I don't see either of them as victims of anything but their own ambition.

Comments

[ByersL]

I was thinking she didn't know until much later....especially if that other woman was on his planes in 2007....

[elizaW]

A tthe heart of all this mess is the story of a wife just trying to hold onto her husband and whatever power she still has in the marriage and a man just trying to hold onto his image and whatever power ( none) he still has in politics. Nowhere in this is there any thought about the impact of all this on the country or betraying the voters and supporters who donated to the Edwards cause. Narcissism doesn't begin to describe this behavior.

[lectora]

What I will like someone to explain to me is the whole campaign staffer -father of the child deal..Was in this guy's job description that he had to take the bullet for Edwards, and he will be paid well for it? I mean, the same guy that has been paying her off, moved him, his WIFE, three kids, Edwards lover- and her kid, into the same house!! Now, if that does not scream "we are just doing this to help out but boy is it weird" I do not know what is. And the horse manure keeps on being fling left and right. I do not believe for a second that John just" told ' Elizabeth after and attack of decency.. She obviously was tipped by someone, most likely the new age lover. I do not believe for a second that the affair ended when he says it did.. And it makes me laugh util I cry to think that SOMEONE could believe that this people were paid off and he did not had a clue.
he Edwards knew perfectly well that they were being paid to keep their mouths shut.. while they pretended to be the perfect family..

[who38]

Cate must be so proud of them.

[okeefep1]

so typical.

sure, blame the terminally ill woman here.
god forbid men hold themselves accountable for harming women w/ these extramarital affairs.

[ifihadahammer]

Women should also hold themselves accountable for harming women w/ these extramarital affairs.

When you sleep around with someone you know has a commitment elsewhere, you are no one to play the innocent card.

[AHubbard]

Elizabeth Edwards is a remarkable woman. With grace, strength and generosity, she has used the tragedies and challenges in her life -- cancer, the death of a son, and political loss -- to reach out to and lift up others. Her authenticity, compassion, commitment and intelligence earned her respect and affection in her own right, not merely as the "wife of" a public figure.

Together, she and John have supported each other through trials that drive many couples apart. After more than three decades of marriage, parenting, careers and public life, they remain devoted to each other, notwithstanding her husband's stupid and hurtful and now very public mistake. Elizabeth had to choose how to respond to her husband's affair, just as she had to choose how to respond to her cancer, the death of their child, and the 2004 loss to George Bush. And in each case, she chose to remain true to her commitment to her family, her faith in humanity, her ideals and values, and her life partner.

Did she underestimate or overlook the political dimensions of her husband's private failings? Did she have unrealistic hopes that she and John could work through this intensely painful and personal matter between themselves, as so many married couples do, and not in the headlines? Perhaps. But that hardly makes her unworthy of respect. Let's try to have compassion for two accomplished, devoted and decent people as they face this challenge in their lives together.

[who38]

"Did she underestimate or overlook the political dimensions of her husband's private failings?" Just ask Hillary.

[zoozey]

I really and truly don't think Elizabeth knew in 2006. I seriously think that she may have gotten wind of it around that Apr. 07 timeline, when the last payment was made to what's her-name. I think that is also about the time that Elizabeth's cancer came back. You know, stress can really exacerbate cancer and that is what makes me feel so much compassion for her. I really don't think she knew before he declared himself a candidate. She is too savvy.,and I don't think she would have given him so much support if she had known.

No, of all the things he may be lying about, this may be one. And why she is letting him say she knew, I cannot fathom....except that is over and done with and she probably has just had it!

[tanghorse]

I went to see John Edwards speak at a rally in June of 2007 and I donated money to his campaign, and I am angry and embarrassed.

Both of the Edwards lied to the American people and they both put their objectives ahead of not just honor and integrity - they put all Democrats in the position of losing right before this crucial Presidential election.

It doesn't matter if you think having an affair should disqualify someone for office. Too many voters think it should. That's just the truth of the current state of politics.

And if John Edwards had won the Democratic nomination and run against McCain, and then in October of 2008, the truth about this affair came out, we would once again be stuck with a pathetic Republican leader and a repeat of the self-serving politics we've endured for the last eight years.

Any progress that we could have made as a country - improved education, environmental protections, a withdrawal from Iraq, lives saved because the war didn't continue, advances in so many areas... John and Elizabeth Edwards should both be ashamed of taking this chance with so many lives and with the future of our country for their own personal agenda.

[WFV]

Don't blame the victim.

Maybe you or I would have done things differently, but no one can judge what happens in a marriage. She did was she felt was best for herself and her children.

Your article makes it look like she conspired an affair and a coverup, which is ridiculous. Do I agree with how they handled this mess? No. Am I disappointed? Yes, lies are disappointing, particularly when a candidate has so much to offer in the way of policy. But don't get down on Elizabeth. She has earned the right to make her own choices, whether you agree or not.

[who38]

She is not a victim. At least, she is an enabler.

[mairs]

Clinton, Spitzer, Edwards. I don't have to lose a child or get cancer to be able to voice my opinion. I have also lost respect for Elizabeth because what her husband does privately entered the public sphere the moment he decided to run for the presidency. He played fast and loose with the Democratic party, hoping his indiscretion wouldn't be found out. You can't ignore the fact that we are especially sensitive to philandering presidents given the years we were made to suffer through the serial shenanigans of Bill Clinton. That this woman was set up in business using donated funds, and was set up comfortably by an Edwards friend is more than just a casual indiscretion. I'm sick of having the reprehensible private lives of prominent Democrats being thrown in our faces. Is it too much to ask them to think of the party first and NOT to run if they have to keep looking over their shoulders or sneaking around hoping they won't get caught at something or other? Please!

[who38]

Thank you for this post.

[lady49]

I will say it again: THE DEMOCRATIC PARTY WILL STAND BEHIND SENATOR EDWARDS AND HIS FAMILY!

The lifetime work he has done to help the poor and working class in this nation...FAR OUTWEIGHS the harm that a momentary lapse of judgment does.

He has asked God to forgive him and he asked his wife to forgive him.....that's all that needs to be discussed.

Besides, George W. Bush has done FAR WORSE to this nation with over 4,200 of our soldiers dead in a war that didn't need to happen!!

WAKE UP!!!!

[tbone99]

What does "the Dem party will stand behind Edwards" mean?

I mean if he was so interested in helping the poor and working class he wouldn't have parked this roadshow in the the middle of the presidential campaign.

He really only has a a couple of priorities now, make it up to his family and stand- up for his new child.

The Dem party can only be crippled by this fiasco to the extent it becomes not only was he unfaithful ( yawn) but carried on while his wife was ill and he was campaignig , but has apparently paid money to make "arrangements" and denies the child is his .The last one is unforgiveable.That child needs protection and a proud father. maybe Edwrds should listen to one of Obama's lectures on fatherhood. Oh yeah , he's white , pass given.

[skycontrol]

Lost in the mulch pile of dishonesty, infidelity, arrogance, narcissism and hypocrisy is the misuse of $114,000 donated by supporters who believed that John Edwards was fighting for a better America.

John Edward's actions constitute embezzlement - a criminal action.

He must be compelled to offer a full accounting of campaign funds spent to finance his affair. Rielle Hunter's expenses: plane fares to Africa and elsewhere, the hotel and meal charges, cocktails, etc. were, I am sure, picked up by the campaign.

The total amount embezzled might approach a million dollars.

John Edwards spoke of "Two Americas" and now we are learning that there are two John Edwards. The hypocrisy of the real John Edwards is staggering!

[PMSBarbie]

After you and your spouse lose a child and are given a terminal cancer diagnosis - then your opinion might be worth something. Until then - grow up.

No one can begin to understand what went on - but people are fragile. Yet they can still make sound judgments on policy and law.

I maintain utmost respect for these human beings. I wish them well.

[americanwomaninpa]

I wonder if you would feel the same if they were republicans. I hope that you would. I am going to vote for McCain this time, but it does not give me any satisfaction to see the Edwards family go through this nightmare. It happens in both parties. It just is what it is.

[Spokane]

The poor of this country need to be heard from ( as he paid for the mansion his girl friend lived in Chapel Hill N.C. ) and I am their spokesperson. He said.

4 million for the least expensive house in the development there.

I stopped seeing the woman in 2006 when my wife's cancer was in remission ( oops National Enquirer photos taked in 2008 )

I will help the people of New Orleans ( whoops more photos different month 2008 ) because I am the here for you.

[Spokane]

Mrs. Edwards should have stopped him from running ( or at least tried ) because he has not an ounce of character.

[dodosong]

I am re-looking at Elizabeth. People say things like she is "genuine, intelligent-with real warmth and courage"....Well, I thought so, too, but now it is clear that they BOTH deceived the public and played their supporters for fools. They both put their arrogance and ambition before the country and the party.

As one of Edwards' supporters in the primary, I thought that Obama could not choose a better Attorney General. Now I am having to face my delusions. I know now that if he would have been our nominee, we would be looking forward to 4 more years of Republican incompetence and corruption.

Elizabeth can go on supporting him and colluding in their lies, and I will feel pity for their genuinely personal problems. But she knew, perhaps better than he, what THEIR lies would cost the country had he been nominated, and I have no sympathy for the "private position" they took (that is 'spin' for 'colluding in a selfish and arrogant conspiracy against the American people and their supporters for personal gain'.) I have absolutely no sympathy for either of them for that.

[Pegi]

I have mixed feelings on this. I do agree with the writer that I kind of lost a little respect for Elizabeth for encouraging his run for the office of President after knowing about this affair. I am also confused by both of them. They are intelligent educated people, how could they (or at least one of them) not realize that in this 24/7 news cycle that this affair would be kept secret? What if he had won and we were facing the convention in two weeks? This is what I can't wrap my brain around. Are they that stupid or that "ballsy"? Anyway, Senator, please come clean on the rest of it, you know it is going to come out eventually so spare yourself and your family the anguish and come out with the truth. The media these days will hound you forever so rip off the bandaid and be done with it. The rest of me feels very sad. John Edwards spoke of genuine ills in our society and offered a lot of hope on those ills. I feel now Sir, your words fall on deaf ears.