Cindy McCain: Pretty in Pink

Do we want our daughters pretty in pink?

This story took a week to ferment and bubble to the surface of my psyche. It is directed at women, and it's about a stupid news magazine cover that should not mean anything -- but for deeply complicated reasons it does.

The magazine is Newsweek and Cindy McCain is on the cover.

It's the message the cover of the magazine sends -- a message of conformity that First Ladies of old were mostly forced to project. Look closely -- conformity is illustrated in every pixel. Pick it up and take a look with an open-heart and an unjaundiced eye. Are we backsliding?
Or are we getting pushed.

The fingerprints of political consultants and image therapists are smeared over the cover like flies -- well you know. Cindy McCain is no dummy. She's married to John McCain for goodness sakes, and she is the chairwoman of her own company. She's the age of most grandmothers, so why make her look as if she is just another Paris Hilton-ized size two?

Forced to project a pretty in pink image is not so easy, and once a woman gives the okay, it is hard to get the power to say no in return.

Most female anchors go through the same drill. Corporate owners of newsrooms -- often deeply entrenched in the entertainment business -- require subservience and deference. The pastels begin multiplying in the closet.

Consider the older man -- younger -- woman anchor teams with the same demographics as Cindy and John McCain. Many of the ultra-conformists running newsrooms across the country make sure the female is perky, smiling, deferential and pretty in pink. Is there a parallel? Are we sold everything?

One anchor-woman in San Francisco wears a pink leather suit! Now really who is she trying to please? The answer to that question is the men who consider her an appendage -- a sweet little pussy cat -- purring perfection while giving up her own soul in the process. Hillary in blue slacks is their nightmare!

Why is it that the more conservative corporate leaders get, the more pretty in pink women show up to wave their pom-poms for the men in power -- men who often have few boundaries and wouldn't be caught dead in a pink suit.

We are back to the same old question: Why do women work so hard to be loved and why does that continue to involve being thin, having no wrinkles, smiling on cue and SHUTTING THEIR MOUTHS?

I know a woman who jogs six miles a day and cries as she pushes past all the other wives out doing the same thing. She says frankly that her husband will look elsewhere if she is not fit. He hasn't listened to a thing she's had to say in years

Imagine Princess Diana after attending a state dinner holding back her hair in the bathroom praying to the porcelain God. How many times did that dear woman wipe vomit from her designer gown or pick it out of her hair before leaving the restroom -- all in an effort to make a man love her who never did and never would?

What young women need now are heroes. They need to see women saying no to image consultants and unreal expectations. They need to understand images on most magazines are PhotoShopped and the lies of perfection are created by the publishers.

We've had President's wives who love birds and flowers and designer clothes and wanted nothing more than a title and a closed mouth. But there were a few who sat as equals: Abigail, Roselyn, Eleanor come to mind.

Michelle Obama and Cindy McCain -- who are you really? The consultants tell you not to speak of issues when those issues have defined your lives just as they have ours. Remember, for every person who hates you for opening your mouth -- two will admire your courage and feel protected by you.

This time around, America needs a woman in the White House tempering the testosterone with reason and helping an often isolated president understand the condition of the people living in the nation he governs for them. We need an Eleanor Roosevelt.

Between the years 1933 and 1945, Eleanor Roosevelt dictated 2,500 newspaper columns, wrote 300 magazine articles, published six books and gave roughly 70 speeches a year. She served as chair of the United Nations Human Rights Commission, and was routinely called "The First Lady of the World." That's the kind of First Lady America needs. We are tired of lies whether they be verbal, ocular, or PhotoShopped.

Ignore the consultants, be brave -- the times call for it and the people are demanding it. When Michelle and Cindy speak, we will spot the wife who is the friend to her husband and the woman who can be a friend to the nation. Yes, you must choose your words carefully, but after all -- that is what separates the girl from the woman isn't it?

Worn out images of perfection always self destruct. Nature makes sure of that. But honesty during hard times can make us stronger. Damn the consultants, damn the people who tell you to close your mouth.

Speak.

Comments

[bullypulpit]

"This time around, America needs a woman in the White House tempering the testosterone with reason and helping an often isolated president understand the condition of the people living in the nation he governs for them. We need an Eleanor Roosevelt."

Anyone else find this sexist? Suppose a male wrote "tempering the estrogen with reason..." Would there not be an outcry?

Just sayin...

[persisxx]

Why, Leslie? Because, unlike you, we are smart enough not to judge a book by its cover. Cindy is smart, tough, loyal, hardworking, and proud to be American - she can wear pink for all I care.

[going2ireland]

Are we to honestly believe that Cindy McCain has all the smarts to run anything? No - she is just the corporate representative. It is the smart people who actually do the work and make the decisions. She is just a pretty thing in stylish clothing who has the money to allow the smart people to work with it.

[belikejeanvaljean]

At least she is smart enough not to joke about killing Iranians...

[BilCon]

I suppose that she was idiotic to allow Mother Theresa to convince her to adopt the young Indian orphan with the cleft palate. (Cindy sits on the board of Operation Smile, and that young child is a teenager now) Or maybe you mean that she couldn't run an organization devoted to removing unexploded land mines. Possibly that she isn't qualified to sit on the board of CARE, devoted to lifting the women of the world from poverty?

[belikejeanvaljean]

So Cindy McCain sometimes wears pink - so what? On Sunday she wore a green dress. Is that bad, too, or are just certain colors on your forbidden list for modern women in the public eye? Should she only wear dark pantsuits to conform to what you believe her image should be? And just because she has a great figure for someone her age doesn't mean she has an eating disorder. Most likely she, like a lot of women her age, is naturally thin or makes it a point to eat properly and exercise. Should she pack on the pounds and get a Hillary hairstyle so to please you?

Image consultants aren't just for women. When he was running for president, Al Gore had a consultant that advised him to wear brown suits. Probably most people at the level of a presidential campaign have image managers today. How do you feel about the yellow pantsuit Hillary wore recently that was no doubt picked out by an image maker?

Cindy McCain is her own woman and pink is just another color. Her taste in clothing was set long before her husband ran for president. She has a softer personality than a Hillary or an Eleanor Roosevelt, but why is this bad? Most of us are not Eleanors. Cindy is being Cindy and I don't think she should be criticized for that. After all, isn't being who you really are, what feminism is all about?

[RedDogBear]

First of all I find it a little insulting that you say this story is directed only at women. Do you think Dads don't care about their daughters and aren't as concerned about body image, etc? I can assure you that some of us are. I also think the emphasis on first ladies is a distraction one of many that keeps the discussion about the presidency away from the issues that matter: healthcare, Iraq, the economy, global warming, peak oil. Wake up people! This country is in real trouble. The wonderful experiment that US democracy represents could be on its last legs. Yet instead of talking about real issues we talk about first ladies and fist bumps and all manner of garbage. My daughter is too smart to ever be influenced by what Cindy McCain is wearing. She can find her own role models and plenty of them: musicians, animal rights activists, and some of her teachers. Its not that I'm not empathetic with your concerns about body image and clothes and their effect on girls and women. I just think that when it comes to the presidency these issues are a distraction.

[Gma11]

I've got five daughters, seven granddaughters. Some love the color pink, some don't. I'm all for diversity. And for women assuming whatever roles they choose. Whether that's pretty in pink or ballsy in blue.

[seatea1967]

If women are letting themselves be pushed into some 1950's box, they've nobody to blame but themselves, in my opinion.

I could sit here and point out a multitude of strong women icons in roles shattering all conventions of what women could traditionally have hoped to accomplish... women who are doing things unimaginable as recently as 25 years ago. The women who are doing these things didn't sit around blaming the media, or blaming society. They got out there, ignored the rules and kicked some butt!

If a woman wants to look to Britney as a role model, it's their choice. Other women might look to any of the REAL female role models in the world today instead.

My advice is don't blame, don't point fingers, don't give up your power. Go out and DO. Everything else is a cop-out.

[nanoscare]

The author should explore the similarities between Paris Hilton and Cindy McCain more extensively. If Paris was the same age as Cindy or if Cindy had been born much much later, they really would be the same person. Think of the page views. They both like pink.

And while we are at it, I want my local news anchor-man to wear leather, why should people in California get all the fun?

[shrinqrap]

While they may not be "pretty in pink", it appears that a highly vocal number of 'strong' former Hillary supporters are now opting for that older man who never can nor ever will love them back.

Thye are asserting somethig, but Im not sure what. Does the author have an explanantion for this?

[RedDogBear]

Excellent point. I also don't understand the "Obama can't pick a female VP unless its Hillary" line of reasoning. How is that supporting feminism? Real feminists would support other women VP candidates such as Sebelius (sp?).