Spiritual Sex: The Art Of The Multidimensional Orgasm

Many of you have expressed appreciation for this topic of spiritual sex and I'll share one quote from an email: "So rare do you hear people talking about the *truth* of sex, the beautiful, deeper, connections that can be made that go so beyond physical contact . . ." Whatever level of sexuality you choose, that's great, but I am choosing to write about the realms of sexuality beyond the pure physical act.

I thank you for responding and some comments have inspired me to choose the topic for this post. Even though spiritual sex is not synonymous with orgasms, there was considerable discussion about it; some comments even equated "spiritual sex" with "religion and orgasms." To date, all I've said about the subject is that the Performance Model (our culture's prevailing view of sex) has orgasm as its goal. Our culture is preoccupied with producing orgasms and sexual dysfunction is most distressing not only because of lowered self esteem but also because orgasms are negatively impacted (not having one at all, or not having it in the perceived "right way"). It's a huge deal in my field of sex therapy and much has been said about the various dysfunctions, but there is a way to shift out of this paradigm altogether so that pleasure is possible whatever the functioning level. So I'd like to discuss something not well understood in culturally normative views of sex.

There is something I'll call "conventional" orgasm, which may be what some of you are referencing as you write your comments. Neurochemically, orgasm releases the hormone oxytocin, which promotes good feelings and can lead to mutual comfort, safety, and caring, but not always. For example, if you have an orgasm with a casual encounter, it is unlikely to promote anything but a feeling of release with a strong desire to go home. Many times disconnected or addictive sex can lead to emotional irritability and intense feelings of malaise, self blame or even the blues.

Oxytocin breaks down quickly in the body, so the good feelings dissipate rapidly unless you choose to maintain the powerful relationship bonding that sex can offer. If you remember the exercise called Touching Hearts that I suggested in the second blog, (sadly, some people thought they'd feel silly trying it with their partners) there are great benefits from stimulating emotions that accompany open-heartedness such as appreciation, giving, caring, closeness. These emotions decrease our levels of cortisol, high levels of which are harmful, and increase our levels of the beneficial hormone, DHEA.

However, aside from genitally focused sex, with its relatively rapid release and let down after orgasm, there are two other levels (there are many, but I'm keeping it simple). These are:

Conscious Loving which is the enhancement of partner commitment through loving communion. It includes the experience of the "valley orgasm:" longer lasting and continuing waves of energy moving through the body. It is the heart level of sexuality.

Spiritual Union which is the ecstatic expanded experience producing altered states of consciousness. It encompasses the "cosmic orgasm:" the timeless, boundless state where orgasmic waves move through all the energy centers. Cosmic orgasm can and does occur spontaneously to anyone, but as a practice, it can replenish the life force with release through the crown of the head.

The truth is we are capable of experiencing orgasms in multiple dimensions. Energy centers, called chakras (meaning "spinning wheels" in Sanskrit) are not anatomical structures in the body but are clusters of oscillating energy. Chakras function like electrical transformers, lowering the vibrating rate of life force energy, called Prana in the Vedic system and enabling it to flow through the body. We are actually an organized combination of several energy systems around a unifying field. If we could see the subtle light bodies around us, we would look somewhat like a "luminous egg." It is the electrical energy generated from the combined subtle systems in and around our bodies. When you received acupuncture, for example, the meridians being stimulated with needles are aspects of these subtle energy systems.

If you interested in reading more about this or even getting some training, some of the esoteric systems of spiritual sexuality available in the West are: Tantra, Kundalini Yoga, Quodoushka, Egyptian, Taoist and Toltec traditions to name a few. These traditions offer wisdom about sexuality that can balance us and benefit our health as well as heighten spiritual awareness. My own research into esoteric sexuality has focused on the Stone and Bronze Age Pre-patriarchal cultures, and my final blog before I go on vacation in early September will be on the ritual of the Sacred Marriage.

Comments

[Elsbeth Meuth]

Thanks, Linda, for sharing your wisdom and knowledge with us here on HuffPost. I appreciate the view and place you come from re spiritual sex. Your blog is inspiring!

Freddy Zental and I just started our blog on HuffPost on Tantra, TantraNova and sexual-spiritual consciousness. Great to be in partnership with you in sharing the possibilities of fulfillment, joy and consciousness raising in the sexual and spiritual aspects of life.

Warm regards, Elsbeth

[khanti]

Sex guru Osho (Bhagwan Shree Rajneesh) ?

[athenasword]

I remember this kind of spirtual, sexual union and it was easy to create when I was younger. I felt juicy, and pleasure was a gift to myslef and my partner. As I've gotten older, I seem to have forgotten this... perhaps it is time to recall and reclaim that magical way of being together.

[elmerfude]

I didn't find it until well into my 60s.

[MerrieWay]

Trust, lust, must...be the union.

[PhilipB]

I loved your post;
I would just add our experience: the vows you take to love to honor and cherish, in sickness and and health , takes on a new kind of meaning as an older couple; I would never have thought we were "older" until it just came upon us!
It is the human condition to want intimacy; As an older couple we have been through the early stages of sexuality, but now, with one of us so ill, we see " the bigger idea" of what our relationship is.
All stages are true: from the beginning of romantic love to the real work in the middle period and then to finding what is really important in being a couple in the latter part of ones life.
Thank you and all the best regards!

[bikerdude]

I like your comment. Unfortunately sometimes that relationship doesn't grow as you suggest. As individual needs/wants change, sometimes these relationships grow apart.

[jazzybo]

Knock it out share a cig lights out.Works for me!

[duxguts]

Multidimensional, spiritual unions, valley orgasms, Toltec traditions. What happened to a good old bonk?

[elmerfude]

Some of us grew beyond it after junior high school.

[bouldercreeker]

If HuffPost is a progressive website, why is it that virtually all photos accompanying sex and relationship articles feature heterosexual couples? There are plenty of same-sex couples out there and we would like some representation beyond images of rainbow flags.

I commend the article itself for being gender neutral--allowing all kinds of couples to relate.

[Midnightrain]

What you write about contains much truth. I have experienced it.

[ChillUpMyLeg]

little deaths.....little deaths....little deaths....

[CR46]

I think of it more as

a little heaven...alittle heaven...alittle heaven :)

[GonzoFactor]

Multidimensional? I though three dimensions were pretty good: length, width, and depth.

[AhnAmuru]

Tee-hee-hee!

Y'all saw someones naked pee-pee & did bad manners.

Hehehehe!

[Bluedanube]

March on Washington for healthcare reform on Sept. 13th. Pass it along. The people united cannot be defeated.

[alexhoward]

You hilarious New Agers. You people make me laugh so very, very hard.

[generationyes]

Bet your wife doesn't think you're funny.

[bikerdude]

Wife? Alex? I hope not!

[alexhoward]

And I bet you think crystals and homeopathy can cure all ills.

[Cranbot]

As one who has experienced both the Conscious Loving orgasm (or valley orgasm) of continuing waves of contractions throughout my vagina and body and the Spiritual orgasm where time, sight and sound are suspended I feel profoundly sad for anyone who has not had those experiences. I miss my ex-husband sexually because these existed for the two of us. The only other time I have experienced these is when I am suspended in sleep paralysis. I frequently have sexual dreams during this time and can spontaneously orgasm. It is a nether world between sleep and wake and one time I counted 35 orgasms in a 2 or so hour period. The best I have done conscious and with the ex is 7.