Dorm On Fire? Who You Shouldn't Call First

You wake up and your fraternity house is in flames. Who do you call?

A) 911
B) Your parents

At Boston University Sunday night the fire department was alerted to a blaze at an off-campus building that was home to several members of Sigma Alpha Mu, one of whom apparently heard the fire alarm and... called home. The University's website reports:

BU Police Chief Thomas Robbins says his department received a call from a parent of one of the students in the apartment, whose first response was to call home. Robbins says he hopes that students learn to make their first and immediate call to 911 or to the BUPD at 617-353-2121. 'We've got to get our number on the students' radar,' he says. 'It's great that this person called a parent, but people in danger should call us first, then call a parent.'

Seven students were hospitalized as a result of that blaze, and that is one of the things that makes blogger Lenore Skenazy sad. Skenazy coined the phrase "Free Range Kids," as a reaction against the overparenting that she worries is rampant nowadays -- spending so much energy protecting our children from the world that they are unprepared to live in it. Is this misdirected phone call a result of that "Mom and Dad will fix it" approach, she wonders.

I join Chief Thomas in wishing that every child were drilled in how -- and who -- to call for help.

I join Lenore in saying " I dearly hope the person who is in critical condition pulls through and lives a long and happy life."

And I also suspect I join many of you in sending this clip to your college age children.

 

 

 

Comments

[Lisa Paolillo Cooper]

03:55 PM on 01/29/2012

My oldest child fought me tooth and nail when I started to "push the baby bird out of the nest." She wanted to be dependent like her friends! She's now in college and not only do most of her friends' parents pay all the bills, they also give these adult children money to eat out regularly! On the other hand, I always watched my under 9 kids when they played outside. Mostly because there was hardly ever any one else outside, so unlike when I was a kid, any one could have just come down the block and snatched my children without any witnesses. But also because I didn't want them doing some of the reckless stuff I did when dared that could have gotten me killed.

[jzzy55]

12:45 PM on 01/29/2012

Is it just parents who are responsible for this? I was on vacation out of the US this past week and cut off from the Internet (which was a good thing in my case). When I finally logged into my email for the first time in six days, the newest message was an alert from my son's college that a shooter was in a McDonald's on the periphery of his campus. Four more alerts followed. If I had been at home I would have called or texted him immediately. Since Columbine I think parents feel the need to stay connected, if only because the "authorities" do not always handle things very well or the way parents would advise. My dad always told me that in an emergency to think for myself no matter what the "party line" was, because most likely the people telling you what to do had no more training or experience with an emergency thanI did. I have left buildings when told by a boss not to because I don't see why I should listen to someone just because they are paid more than I am. They don't have any special knowledge of how fires spread or violent people behave. I've never regretted it and never got in trouble either. In fact afterwards I've had people confide in me that they wish they'd had the nerve to do what I did.

[Dheffernan]

05:52 PM on 01/28/2012

We recently had a "family fire drill" in order to teach my 4yr old and 2yr old what to do incase of a fire. We set off the fire alarm, and had my daughter run to the meeting place by the door, (our 2yr old didnt get it. We encouraged our daughter to try to get her brother to follow her, but if he didnt want to, we didnt want her to feel responsible for her brother.) People thought we we're so ridiculous and we shouldn't unnecessarily scare our child. God-forbid we try to instill some confidence and independence in our young children.

[J R M]

01:38 AM on 01/27/2012

When I went to college at the University of Maryland, College Park over 40 years ago we tended to be rather self-reliant. We would have tried to put it out with the fire extinguisher first (if it was small enough). As it was, my dorm had the lowest repair rate of any dorm on campus when I was there - we fixed things ourselves so the physical plant staff and administration didn't get upset. I remember patching a rather large hole in a cinderblock wall that a drunk student hammered. By the time we were done, it didn't show at all, we had filled in all the damage with high strength concrete and refinished it so that the groves were all correct and then repainted the wall to match. Given the talent in the dorm, the RA took the view that if the problem was fixed within a day - nothing had happened.

[Janet McMonagle]

09:06 PM on 01/26/2012

When I was a family child care provider, we had regular fire drills which included meeting at a designated spot, and practice calling 911 - watching me do it on a toy phone, but they knew how to use a phone and what to do. We talked about how you do NOT call 911 unless the trouble is real. Those kids were 4 years old.

I have no patience with people whose kids are college age and still think that mommy and daddy will fix it. None. It is so easy - and actually fun - to teach little ones how to save themselves and maybe each other in an emergency and stay safe.

[guacamolem]

03:27 PM on 01/26/2012

"Parents" today are rediculously overprotective. I remember when my sister & I were little we used to jump up & down in the back seat of my dad's cutlass while drove down the road enjoying his 12 pack of Miller Lite. Okay, bad example. But when I see kids riding their bikes or on their skate boards while decked out in all kinds of pads, armour & helmets looking like Robo-Cop I just have to shake my head. Kids should be able to do these things & be care free, let them fall & skin their knees or a road burn on their arm. Let them climb trees, sometimes they climb higher, sometimes they fall & break an arm. And it is absolutely absurd that everyone gets a trophy at the end of little league season. Let the kids get used to the fact that one team wins & the others just have to try again next year. I was bullied from kindergarten to sixth grade & even in jr high & high school I was far from being the popular guy but I FOUGHT BACK, I STOOD UP to the bullies, I BRUSHED IT OFF, I GOT OVER IT. I didn't need for the state or federal government to pass anti-bullying legislation or have my parents home school me & I didn't give up & let it take my life. I see people my age raising their kids to be useless & that truly is the sad thing

[Jennifer Zirn]

02:25 PM on 01/26/2012

I understand wanting to have the help of a parent who's had life experience, but really? Calling them before calling the fire department. You should know what to do in that situation. My brother and I were home, and had a field fire. We knew well enough to call 911, then called our mother.

[lstmuga]

02:13 PM on 01/26/2012

How often do you see and ad on TV telling you that you "deserve" what ever product they are selling? This bothers me.

[jdshannon03]

02:08 PM on 01/26/2012

For what it is worth, my 17 year old daughter can change a tire, change her own oil, and balance her own checkbook. I must be HORRIBLE parent for the way I have treated her. Oh wait she also learned the importance of being self reliant, understands that actions have consequences, and realizes the importance of making informed and positive choices. Need I also mention that she makes straight "A's", is taking college classes as a junior in high school, and can defend herself, in a debate, or physically. I could be wrong, but I feel confident that when she gets to college, if a fire breaks out she will : (1) call 911, (2) get to safety, and THEN (3) call mom and dad explaining what happened, that not to worry, she is safe. And maybe, just maybe she will thank us for teaching her to deal with life! Whoever this young lady marries someday will be a VERY lucky man. Of course I am her dad, I am supposed to feel that way! LOL

[lstmuga]

01:58 PM on 01/26/2012

I can't remembe a time in my life when I was "too young" to mow the lawn. I pushed a rotary mower as soon as I was tall enough. Today's parents don't let their kids do anything that remotely might result in any kind of accident. Even falling down and skinning their knee. They treat them like babies until they are 18 and then all of a sudden, they're old enought to vote and they expect them to be adults. Or worse, they never have any adult expectations for them at all. As a parent, I would be humilitated if my child didn't have sense enough to dial 911 for a fire.

[lovbuton]

01:53 PM on 01/26/2012

We have raised a bunch of babies, for life!!!

[jdshannon03]

02:09 PM on 01/26/2012

Not my kids!

[PutYourNameOnIt]

01:45 PM on 01/26/2012

She probably just couldn't remember the number to 911, and had her mom's number stored in her phone. Who can remember numbers nowadays.

[Dheffernan]

05:41 PM on 01/28/2012

Fraternity implies brotherhood. Not she, but he.

[SandyCastle]

01:45 PM on 01/26/2012

I teach a parenting class to new parents. One of the first handouts I give out asks the question, "What do you want to teach your child?" Some people check "creativity," some people check "responsibility," some people check "spirituality." But it is amazing how few check the box for "independence."

I always tell them they will think it is important when they have a 25-year-old slacker living in their basement!

[Ken Koziol]

01:20 PM on 01/26/2012

We have been protecting them for the last 30 years to the extreme. It all starts when they take their first step. At that moment everything in the house get child proofed. The problem with that is they don't know why and we don't always tell them.
So they grow up and don't know how to deal with the real world so guess what they call home for an answer.

[jdshannon03]

01:04 PM on 01/26/2012

I truly hope that this isn't taken as being insensitive, because it it not my intent. But in the article, it is mentioned that parents are "spending so much energy protecting our children from the world that they are unprepared to live in it". I put that out as a possible reason for the rise in teen suicides. In a lot of cases they have never been able to learn the truth about life. That it isn't always fair. In some cases the attitude is "my poor baby, let mommy and daddy protect you". When kids need to learn that sometimes they will have to fend for themselves. That IN SOME CASES they have to deal with problems on their own. If they never learn to do so, is it any wonder that more children are committing suicide? They can't cope. They were NEVER taught to handle problems. My children understand that they can always call or talk to me. But that I CANNOT not always be there to protect them, or deal with all of their problems for them. As a result my kids can take care of themselves, meet challenges head-on, and deal with life's inevitable problems in a positive manner. And yes, they can call me if they need help, but it is not their only choice.

[lovbuton]

01:55 PM on 01/26/2012

Well stated!!

[jdshannon03]

02:12 PM on 01/26/2012

Thank you! I figured that I would be getting hate mail over it. I already had my mommy on speed dial to ask what to do. OR NOT!