How You Can Find And Keep Mr. Right After 50

03/11/2015 07:06 am ET | Updated May 11, 2015

Most women want a man in their life.

After all, don't you? That's why you're reading this, isn't it?

And you've probably gone online or out into the real world to find him.

But you haven't for many reasons.

So next thing you know, you're going to dinner with your friends and you find yourself saying things like...

"There are no good men out there to date after 50."

"Maybe I'm just too picky."

"I don't want to settle."

"Good men don't exist anymore or they're taken."

"I'm going to quit."

"It's just not going to happen for me."

"I'll be okay alone."

"I've done it this way so far but I sure am lonely."

Sound familiar?

Now I want to ask you a question. Take a minute to think about this.

Are you really committed to finding the right man for you?

You might say, "Of course I am," and then the excuses begin all over again... "But there are no good men to date," and so on.

Guess what you're really committed to?

Your excuses!

It's called a subconscious commitment and it really messes with your goal of finding a good man.

There is a Law of Attraction saying that goes like this...

"What we focus on is what we attract into our lives."

So when you focus on the idea that there are no good men out there to date, guess what happens?

No good men show up for you to date.

A subconscious commitment is like having a virus on your computer.

You know how a virus can take a perfectly good program and totally wreck havoc with it?

This is what a subconscious commitment does to your dating dreams.

It sabotages them and keeps you from getting what you want.

So what can you do about this?

1. Stop putting negatives vibes out into the Universe.

Excuses send the wrong message and hold you back from getting the great guy.

Remember, the Universe always brings you what you put your attention on.

Make it a habit to focus on what you really want when it comes to a man and the relationship you desire.

Yes, there are good guys and not so great guys out there but when you only view the world from a place of lack, you won't be able to spot the diamond in the rough who could be right in front of you in life or on your computer screen.

If you want Mr. Right to show up, shift your mindset to one of abundance today by viewing the world as a place filled with lots of great men to date.

2. Don't let excuses rule your life.

When the excuses sneak back in, which they will since the mind loves playing tricks to keep you safe, push them back by once again focusing on the man and the relationship you want.

Often, we get caught up in all of the qualities we want the men we date to have. What's missing is why you want a man in your life and why you want him to have certain qualities to date you.

Getting clear on the why sends a vision of what you want to the Universe.

Put out into the Universe the what and why. One last note here - let go of the how and the where he'll appear. Just keep an open mind so you can see him when he shows up.

3. Seek the support you need.

It's pretty hard to figure out over 50's dating on your own.

Yet there are lots of ways you can quickly get the support and the information you need to find the right man for you... Read a book about it, join a support group, hire a dating coach, and do whatever it takes to attract the relationship you want.

Recently, a client shared this thought with me ... for years, she'd invested financially and emotionally in improving her business and personal life.

But when it came to dating, she always had the mindset that she should know what to do.

In case you were wondering, dating is actually a learned skill, not something you were born with.

Once she and I started working together, she told me that coaching one on one with me was one of the best investments of her time, her energy and her money.

Why? Because for the first time, she was getting good results with men.

I was able to show her what was keeping her from getting the right guy.

And once I showed her how to shift her dating mindset about men, it totally changed her dating life!

You can have a great guy in your life too.

Just decide whether you're committed to your excuses of why he isn't in your life or whether you're committed to doing everything it takes to attract and keep him.

Lisa Copeland is known as the expert on over 50's dating. Find out the 5 Little Known Secrets To Find A Quality Man at

Earlier on Huff/Post50:

7 Reasons You Aren't Having Sex