What if everything we've been told bout compromise is wrong?
During the 2004 election -- I was part of two groups in my community. One was conservative, the other was liberal. They both considered me as one of them, so I got to hear their unfiltered assessment of the other side.
I got a whole earful about "those people," those people who don't share our values and who are trying to derail our country.
When you stripped away the specifics, both sides were saying essentially the same thing: They were accusing the other side of having a self-serving, malevolent purpose.
But I knew these people, and I knew what was in their hearts. I knew them to be kind hearted, loving generous and patriotic. And I knew that their assumptions about each other were wrong.
While this was happening in my personal life, I began to notice a similar dynamic in business. I'm a consultant; I work with sales teams and leaders; I've observed hundreds of interactions; I began to see that the my-agenda-versus-your-agenda problem was pervasive.
I saw it in the salesperson who is so focused on making their quota that they view their customer as just a number.
I saw it when the VP Operations, with an efficiency mindset tries meets with the VP of Marketing who comes from a more creative space. They battle it out until they began to see each other as the obstacle to getting anything done.
We've been told that when two sides disagree, we're supposed to compromise, but that never really works.
Here's why: When you compromise, it's like you're trading chips. You hold on tight to the ones that are important to you; you give away the ones that don't mean that much, and you try to get the ones you want from the other side.
But when you're trading chips, you just arguing over what's already on the table, you're not even seeing what's possible. So you wind up with a watered down solution where nobody is happy.
F. Scott Fitzgerald said, "The test of a first rate intelligence is the ability to hold two opposed ideas in the mind at the same time and still retain the ability to function."
I've come to recognize that the my-agenda-versus-your-agenda problem is not only pervasive, it's the root of many of our other problems.
The challenge is, we can't open the door to that new and better solution when we're trying to battle it out or compromise.
This isn't just a political problem; it's a human problem.
Compromise is predicated on the belief that you're going to have to give something up.
When you're overly attached to having things play out in a specific way, you don't want to give anything up. So all creativity is lost, because instead of opening up options, you shut them down.
Our politicians aren't going to change until we do.
We don't have to create a perfect world; we just need to create a better one.
We're always going to be a work in progress. Our job is to move the needle on our shift.
You don't create new solutions by defending the existing ones. And you don't elevate conversations by demonizing the other side.
If you want to create something new and different, you have to be willing to put your preexisting plans on pause. You have to step into a space of uncertainty.
Because that messy, creative, uncertain, ambiguous place where both sides drop their armor and open themselves to something different, is the very place where great ideas are born.
Lisa Earle McLeod is a sales leadership consultant. Companies like Apple, Kimberly-Clark and Pfizer hire her to help them create passionate, purpose-driven sales forces.
She is the author of several books including Selling with Noble Purpose: How to Drive Revenue and Do Work That Makes You Proud, a Wiley publication. She has appeared on The Today Show, and has been featured in Forbes, Fortune and The Wall Street Journal. She provides executive coaching sessions, strategy workshops and keynote speeches.
Our 2024 Coverage Needs You
It's Another Trump-Biden Showdown — And We Need Your Help
The Future Of Democracy Is At Stake
Our 2024 Coverage Needs You
Your Loyalty Means The World To Us
As Americans head to the polls in 2024, the very future of our country is at stake. At HuffPost, we believe that a free press is critical to creating well-informed voters. That's why our journalism is free for everyone, even though other newsrooms retreat behind expensive paywalls.
Our journalists will continue to cover the twists and turns during this historic presidential election. With your help, we'll bring you hard-hitting investigations, well-researched analysis and timely takes you can't find elsewhere. Reporting in this current political climate is a responsibility we do not take lightly, and we thank you for your support.
Contribute as little as $2 to keep our news free for all.
Can't afford to donate? Support HuffPost by creating a free account and log in while you read.
The 2024 election is heating up, and women's rights, health care, voting rights, and the very future of democracy are all at stake. Donald Trump will face Joe Biden in the most consequential vote of our time. And HuffPost will be there, covering every twist and turn. America's future hangs in the balance. Would you consider contributing to support our journalism and keep it free for all during this critical season?
HuffPost believes news should be accessible to everyone, regardless of their ability to pay for it. We rely on readers like you to help fund our work. Any contribution you can make — even as little as $2 — goes directly toward supporting the impactful journalism that we will continue to produce this year. Thank you for being part of our story.
Can't afford to donate? Support HuffPost by creating a free account and log in while you read.
It's official: Donald Trump will face Joe Biden this fall in the presidential election. As we face the most consequential presidential election of our time, HuffPost is committed to bringing you up-to-date, accurate news about the 2024 race. While other outlets have retreated behind paywalls, you can trust our news will stay free.
But we can't do it without your help. Reader funding is one of the key ways we support our newsroom. Would you consider making a donation to help fund our news during this critical time? Your contributions are vital to supporting a free press.
Contribute as little as $2 to keep our journalism free and accessible to all.
Can't afford to donate? Support HuffPost by creating a free account and log in while you read.
As Americans head to the polls in 2024, the very future of our country is at stake. At HuffPost, we believe that a free press is critical to creating well-informed voters. That's why our journalism is free for everyone, even though other newsrooms retreat behind expensive paywalls.
Our journalists will continue to cover the twists and turns during this historic presidential election. With your help, we'll bring you hard-hitting investigations, well-researched analysis and timely takes you can't find elsewhere. Reporting in this current political climate is a responsibility we do not take lightly, and we thank you for your support.
Contribute as little as $2 to keep our news free for all.
Can't afford to donate? Support HuffPost by creating a free account and log in while you read.
Dear HuffPost Reader
Thank you for your past contribution to HuffPost. We are sincerely grateful for readers like you who help us ensure that we can keep our journalism free for everyone.
The stakes are high this year, and our 2024 coverage could use continued support. Would you consider becoming a regular HuffPost contributor?
Dear HuffPost Reader
Thank you for your past contribution to HuffPost. We are sincerely grateful for readers like you who help us ensure that we can keep our journalism free for everyone.
The stakes are high this year, and our 2024 coverage could use continued support. If circumstances have changed since you last contributed, we hope you'll consider contributing to HuffPost once more.
Support HuffPostAlready contributed? Log in to hide these messages.