Michele Bachmental Patient

Poor Michele Bachmann.

It seems our eager cub congressgirl gave an interview using info from her "Hello Kitty Kookoo Congressional Notebook Full of Cool Secret Stuff Only She Knows."

Yes chockful of Bachmanniacal insights, Michele made this "Not even Cheney is this fucking nuts" statement about Iran's plans for Iraq.

Michele Honey, write this on your hand so you can reference it during interviews from now on:

Iran-Shia

Western Iraq- Sunni

Michele, if only you had brought a map of Iraq with you on your trip to crazy town, maybe you would have seen that:

A. A big part of western Iraq is a fun little area called "The Sunni Triangle"

I'm certainly no scholar in Islamic relations but I may have read somewhere about some disagreements the Sunni are having with the Shia, which leads me to believe the Sunni wouldn't be that cool with giving up Anbar for a Shia Killing Club.

And Michele hon, ya kinda overlooked this part:

B. Given that Syria (70% Sunni) is Iraq's neighbor to the west, it doesn't seem they would be that psyched about a Shia terrorist training camp on their border either.

And Michele, here's where the map REALLY woulda come in handy for ya in that interview:

C: Let's say you were Iran. And Michele, I am NOT saying you are Iran, you have a much sunnier disposition and way better outfits. But, if you were Iran and had worked out some deal to take part of Iraq to start up a big terrorist training expo, wouldn't you take THE PART OF THE COUNTRY THAT BORDERS YOURS!!!

Oh Michele, you could have saved yourself all the backpedaling and clarifying if you had quit your daydreaming in Congress and stopped doodling hearts and G.W.'s all over your Iran homework.

Congress isn't just one big party, you have to learn stuff too.

These darn freshman....