Huffpost Comedy
THE BLOG

Featuring fresh takes and real-time analysis from HuffPost's signature lineup of contributors

Lucas Kavner Headshot

So Many Beatles Songs Are Being Turned Into Action Movies

Posted: Updated:
BEATLES
AFP/Getty Images
Print

Tom Cruise recently announced that his next starring vehicle will be an action-packed adaptation of a graphic novel with the title, All You Need Is Kill, which is itself a non-grammatical play on the Beatles' classic song, "All You Need Is Love."

But that's not the only Beatles classic that Hollywood plans to adapt into a big budget thriller. Realizing they could go much further, Hollywood is gunning to develop a host of other Beatles songs into action or horror franchises.

Below, a list of other songs in development:

Yellow Submarine And Guns
Nicolas Cage is a lonely submarine captain who is attacked by a band of mutated fish. He takes matters into his own hands, using guns.

Eleanor Rigamortis
Old Lady Edna living in the rickety blue house may seem kind, but she isn't who she says she is. She is a zombie. Played by Ellen Burstyn.

Back In The U.S.S. Scars
Dolph Lundgren is an aging Russian boxing champion who forms a small militia for some reason.

Carry That Blade
Another installment of the Blade franchise comes to life. Wesley Snipes is in talks to reprise his role, but for tax reasons it might have to go to nobody.

Blackirds Coming To Peck Your Eyes Out
An animated adventure about a bunch of blackbirds flying to the moon. That is, until things go horribly wrong and -- due to radiation -- they are morphed into robot birds, bent on destruction.

A Day In The Death
A mummy lives among us. Played by Sam Rockwell, this mummy reads the news, takes out the trash, and has a smoke upstairs in his room before catching the bus. But what happens when he unravels? Literally!

Dear Prudence, You're Going To Die
Lindsay Lohan is Prudence, a young grad student who receives mysterious letters from a murderer. But maybe she's writing them to...herself?!?!?!

Eight Days Of Bleak
A town is taken over by a giant cloud that rains blood for eight days. And that's when the aliens come.

Happiness Is A Warm Gun (The Movie)
The first action film directed by indie film pioneer, Todd Solondz. An unlikely sequel to his previous film, Happiness.

I Am The Walrus, Hear Me Kill
Mike Myers is a murderous walrus with a violent past, but also a basket of hilarious quips. From Dreamworks.

I Wanna Hold Your Skull
Wes Craven begins a new franchise here. Starring Paul Bettany as a priest who beckons unsuspecting people to his Death Church.

Rocky Bad-Coon
Keanu Reeves is a beautiful, evil raccoon. In 3-D.

Lucy In The Sky With DIE-mans
An evil genius (Gary Oldman) has farmed a collection of humans to mold intricate diamonds which he sells for millions of dollars.

I'm Only Sleeping? No, I'm Awake. And I'm Going To Kill You.
A B-movie property directed by the same people who brought us Cube, Jack Frost, and others.

Maxwell's Silver Hammer
Maxwell, played by the kid from Hugo, is a brilliant hammer-thrower who takes his unique skills to the government. Co-starring Jackie Chan as his mentor, and one of the kids from 3 Ninjas.

Across The Universe: Aliens
David Duchovny and Gillian Anderson unite for a futuristic take on the X-Files franchise.

Norwegian Blood
A deadly virus is discovered in the blood of a few Norwegian alpine skiiers. It soon spreads, just in time for the Olympics.

Ob-La-Di, Ob-La-Die
Jean Claude Van Damme's fifth comeback vehicle about a strong man who is angry.

Paperback Slicer
Retired writer Reginald Waters, played by Frank Langella, uses a letter opener to murder a collection of people who rejected his last novel.

Nightmare On Penny Lane
Pretty much Nightmare on Elm Street, but the street name has been changed. Starring Cheech Marin as the neighbor.

Strawberry Fields Of Never
A group of high school friends revisit the strawberry fields where they used to hang out and drink beer. But this time... there are vampires there.

The Axman
A former IRS worker, played by Jonah Hill, takes revenge on the company that fired him. "Subversive AND action-packed" -studio notes.

While My Guitar Gently Murders You
Mark Wahlberg is rock singer Axel Flores. When fame gets to his head, he thinks he can do anything. EVEN KILL HIS BANDMATES.

You've Got To Hide Your Love In A Bucket Of Blood
Ryan Reynolds is a lawyer who can't seem to settle down, Katherine Heigl is a quirky cupcake designer who stalks and kills him.

Plot unknown for the following films in development:

Good Day Coffin Paneling

Lovely Rita... Or Is She?

Everybody's Got Something To Hide, Especially Me

Free As A Bird (Or A Ghost)

Ticket To Fry