Politically Indirect: Interpreting Politician-Speak

It's easy to hear what politicians say, but not so easy to know exactly what they are saying. We only know the two are not the same. Here are 10 examples of differences between what they say and what they mean:

• FLIP-FLOP
• I didn't think you'd understand the word "reversal."
• ESTEEMED COLLEAGUE
• I hate his guts.

• IF YOU WILL
• I'm sorry, I have no idea of what I just said
• GOING FORWARD
• I'm making a circular movement resulting in a full stop
• WHAT AMERICA WANTS
• Whatever lobbyists pay me to say you want.
• SEA CHANGE
• I'll send U.S. jobs overseas because those corporations pay me a lot more than you do.
• SPECIAL INTERESTS
• Anonymous corporations willing to pay large money for small favors. Pipeline anyone?
• OBSTRUCTIONIST
• By voting no, I can stay loyal to those who pay me the most.
• MANDATE
• That's when I'm paid to make you believe that something you don't want is something you do want. Also known as Inventing Statistics.
• BI-PARTISAN
• Even if it's good for the nation, I say no anyway because it's now my comfort zone.

I used to think D.C. stood for District of Columbia but it doesn't -- it stands for Dodge City.

 

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Comments

[joelparker]

10:20 AM on 12/20/2011

"War is Peace...."

Gorge Orwell was right all along.

"And he loved big brother.".... 1984.

[Dave Astor]

01:30 PM on 12/19/2011

Excellent, funny, depressing, truth-telling post, Maggie. The bold font you used in some of the piece is bolder than almost any politician out there!

[Maggie Van Ostrand]

10:24 AM on 12/21/2011

Love your bold font line, Dave. As they say south of the border, "je je je"

[Bogstomper2]

01:44 AM on 12/17/2011

It's good list, but I think you should have included Christine O'Donnell's latest contribution.

* CONSISTENT
* Consistent since he changed his mind.

I'd add that every time a politician says "freedom" they actually mean "limited freedom". After all, if they believed in total freedom, they wouldn't be looking for a job making rules.

[Maggie Van Ostrand]

10:29 AM on 12/21/2011

You bring up a great point, Bogstomper2. Politicians only achieve real power by limiting the freedom of their slaves, er, I mean their constituents.

[DaveLieber]

06:23 PM on 12/16/2011

The kind gentleman from Texas > I hope that senator remembered to wipe his feet at the door.

[Maggie Van Ostrand]

07:52 PM on 12/16/2011

It's not just his feet that need wiping.

Thanks, Dave!

[mrshep]

04:05 PM on 12/17/2011

Hi Maggie,
That is quite an insightful post. I look forward to more.