Thanksgiving in our household had its own spicy twist.
As Indians, who had emigrated to the United States, the whole concept of turkeys, pilgrims, football, apple pie, and Native Americans with feathers in their hair seemed quite foreign to my parents.
But over time, the day began to hold a lot of meaning and significance. It represented a time to recognize all that they could be grateful for - health, family, success, and happiness. My parents and many of our relatives welcomed family members who would come to Boston from around the country for the gathering. A huge feast was planned for the day, including masala turkey, spicy Indian vegetable filling, and traditional Indian potatoes on the side. Dessert was a combination of apple pies, brownies, and traditional Indian dessert. Bollywood music played in the background, while my brother and other cousins dragged our elders to the television and tried to explain the game of football to them. After genuinely trying to understand the game for a few minutes, the adults would quickly lose interest and drift outside to play cricket.
My memories of Thanksgiving mark in an important lesson in how I want to celebrate holidays with my children. We live in a multicultural society where we marry people of other cultures, from different backgrounds, with different ideologies and religious beliefs. Our holidays and customs build the foundation for how we identify ourselves and who we are connected. While Sumant (my husband) identifies himself as an Indian, I identify myself as Indian American. How will my children identify themselves? Is there a need for them to identify themselves in a mutlicultural society?
I have struggeld with whether or not to get a Christmas tree. We are not Christian, so why would we celebrate the holiday? (When we were young, my parents would buy us one gift each, and hang up a stocking by the fireplace. Christmas was not about gifts, but it became a day we learned about giving.) At the same time, I do not want my young children to feel excluded from the dominant society. I want them to know the Indian festivals like Diwali (the festival of light that marks the New Year) and Hole (the festival of color). But I also want them to understand the traditions and holidays of their friends - from Ramadan to Id to Hanukah and the Chinese Moon Festival.
In a world of so much color and flavor, perhaps the answer is to create a calendar of holidays that we celebrate throughout the year. This calendar is full of rich traditions, color, stories, and most of all connections - bonds with your heritage, world, self and the friends and families you love.
(This is an excerpt from my book, 100 Promises to My Baby.)
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I can so understand your family's dilema! My entire generation (barring me- I am still Indian) are first generation Indian Americans. And to boot all of us are vegetarians. However, the celebration of festivals has been integrated. Hindu festivals with the religious part included and other, well Christian festivals without the religious factors.
It is indeed heartening to see that you want to buy a Christmas tree. Our families do celebrate the spirit of Christmas and the message of love and compassion. In this era of strained relations and warring religious factions, understanding and love will eventually win the hatred. I look forward to the day you blog stating that you have celebrated christmas.
In my personal case, I celebrate all festivals.
Happy Thanksgiving to you and everyone else.
Adding turmeric, a root originally from the Himalayas, to the diet is one of the healthiest things a man or woman can do. Learning to enjoy Indian cooking will help eliminate overweight, will add energy to lives, and will help prevent cancer. It also tastes wonderful. So on this Thanksgiving, we can thank our Indian American neighbors (along with all the other new peoples here such as Thai) for their wonderful tasting and healthy foods.
I think you can easily celebrate the secular parts of Christmas without subscribing to the any of the religious parts.
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