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Manel Baucells and Rakesh Sarin

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How to Engineer a Happier Life

Posted: 04/01/2012 8:20 am

This week, at the United Nations conference on Happiness, the tiny kingdom of Bhutan nestled between India and China will showcase its Gross National Happiness index (GNH) as an alternative to gross national product (GNP). In 1968, Robert F. Kennedy had said that the gross national product "measures everything... except that which makes life worthwhile." Now, the world is coming around with United Nations resolution 65/309 -- "Happiness: Towards a holistic approach to development."

The pursuit of happiness explains the billions of dollars spent each year on consumer goods, from cosmetics and fashion apparel to computers and new cars. Who among us does not want to be happy?

But, happiness is elusive. Scientists have found that American millionaires living in huge, luxurious houses are barely happier than Masai warriors in Kenya who live in huts.

Over the past 10 years, we have examined and analyzed data and evidence from all over the world to come up with a set of laws that govern our happiness. These laws are supported by findings from scientific experiments, examples from ancient literature and pearls of wisdom from the world's religions and spiritual practices. These laws of happiness are universal and apply to all of us. For example, we two coauthors were born and raised in different countries, India and Spain. We were reared in different religions, Hinduism and Catholicism. These large differences in culture and background make us perceive many things differently. The laws of happiness, however, apply equally to both of us.

A logical implication of our laws of happiness is the fundamental equation:

Happiness equals reality minus shifting expectations

As we try to improve our reality, by working harder so we can make more money, buy a bigger house, or drive a fancier car, our expectations also shift. We are happy for a little while, but soon enough expectations catch up with reality. At first blush, this equation paints a gloomy picture. It is no wonder that some scientists have concluded that, "Trying to be happier is as futile as trying to be taller." Let us look on the bright side of the equation. We will give you two strategies for improving happiness and then you can come up with many more on your own.

1. Less to More (Crescendo)

You should plan your life carefully so that the gap between reality and expectations stays the same or increases. That is, the way to be happy is not just to have a lot, but to follow a crescendo strategy in life choices -- less to more. On a small, short-term scale, this can be done on a vacation; rather than immediately visiting the most spectacular museum or historic site, save those experiences for the end of your trip. But as a philosophy of life, you can work to organize the chapters in your book of life from less to more (that is, follow a crescendo strategy). In raising children, for example, do not give them too much too fast. In organizations such as those with call centers or service employees, more frequent promotions associated with achieving some well-defined milestone or goal will improve employee satisfaction. Crescendo strategy is very similar to what is used in karate by awarding different color belts for progress.

2. Basic Goods

Our equation suggests that new material aspirations arise as previous ones are satisfied, making all of us work harder and harder to see ourselves in exactly the same situation all over again: wanting something new. We face a sort of emotional "global warming," if we get used to consuming too much too soon, our future happiness is put at risk. One typical example is that of the children of wealthy parents who are not able to keep up with the lifestyle they've always known.

When it comes to fame and fortune, beware: The equation predicts that your expectations will also rise and any gain in happiness will be temporary.

So, if expectations catch up with reality, is there an easy and foolproof way to be happy? Basic goods escape this paradox, because expectations for these goods do not fluctuate much and these are less susceptible to social comparison. The treasure of happiness that is in reach for most of us is found in basic goods. The simplest example of a basic good is food. We will always enjoy a meal when hungry. But basic goods are present everywhere in our life. How can we tell whether a good or experience is basic or not?

TEST -- Is X a basic good: Ask yourself the following two questions:

1. If nobody knew I am buying or experiencing X, would I still want X?

2. Will I enjoy X in the future, say five years from now, as much as I do now?

If the answer is yes to both questions, then X is a basic good for you.

We can think of basic goods in three categories: the needs of the body, the needs of the heart, and the needs of the mind. Food, health, shelter, sex, and rest are the needs of the body. Basic goods that meet the needs of the heart and mind are things like spending time with friends and family and listening to music we love -- things that consistently make us happy.

Some people say that happiness is like a pendulum -- some days you are happy, some days not, and there's not much you can do to change that. Our view is different. We believe that happiness is like a sailboat. Indeed the wind and ocean currents influence its movements, but you have control of the rudder. Without your exerting control, the sailboat drifts. Our key premise is that happiness is a choice; and regardless of our circumstances or where we are in the world or in our lives, we can all improve our level of happiness. The control lever for extracting happiness from the equation is in your hands. We would love to hear your ideas on how to engineer a happier life.

"No one saves us but ourselves. No one can and no one may. We ourselves must walk the path." -- Buddha

For more by Manel Baucells and Rakesh Sarin, click here.

For more on happiness, click here.

 
 
 
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This week, at the United Nations conference on Happiness, the tiny kingdom of Bhutan nestled between India and China will showcase its Gross National Happiness index (GNH) as an alternative to gross n...
This week, at the United Nations conference on Happiness, the tiny kingdom of Bhutan nestled between India and China will showcase its Gross National Happiness index (GNH) as an alternative to gross n...
 
 
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10:49 AM on 04/04/2012
There are contradictory threads in this article. Trying to become happy by "adding" something to yourself is folly. One does not become happy by feeding the ego. On the one hand it seems to say that we need to "crescendo" our acquisitions and experiences - but the lesson here if you truly examine it is that happiness derived from materialism is *always* temporary. This grasping and holding on to impermanent things is actually the source of unhappiness, according to Buddha (who is quoted at the end of the article). Eckhart Tolle teaches us to recognize Ego when we are feeling "better than" or "less than" someone else. The Ego is happy when we have a bigger house than our neighbor - and that feels good for a short time. But we must attempt to rise beyond this level of mind noise into the realization that we are all essentially one, despite the appearances. That is where happiness lies. If I make my neighbor happy I will be happy too. If I bring misery to others I will be miserable. It all must start by loving oneself (which we are taught is wrong in our culture) and that love will spread naturally to others.

The American culture is fundamentally broken and pathological in this regard. We idolize wealth, fame, and status but do not value love, friendship, and service. Do not be fooled by it!
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livingbettertherapy
Counselor, Therapist, Strategic Intervention
01:25 PM on 04/02/2012
The road to happiness is paved with gratitude for the small things. I asked someone the other day "If you could trade your eyes for the the 600 plus million dollars that so many are trying to win in the lottery, would you?" The person answered no and explained that without eyesight they would not be able to enjoy seeing any of the things that the money could buy. I pressed further, "So you mean to tell me that eyesight is worth more than $600 million dollars to you?" The answer was a resounding "yes." It is so unfortunate that most of the people who usually have a real appreciation for the value of eyesight are blind. Many of the so called small things that we have are actually priceless. Many don't appreciate what they have, until they lose it. Be thankful for what you have and stop running, happiness has been chasing after you all this time. Choose gratitude and happiness will eventually catch you.
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09:10 AM on 04/02/2012
I believe that, before all else, "happiness" requires a feeling of "safety." For some that requires what I would consider a whole lot more "basic goods" than necessary (which I attribute to differences in how the "fear" instinct varies slightly in each of us due to our individual nature/nurture).

As to your "less to more" prescription, I think that works fine until the point, which I hope most of us reach, where more "things" (whether a "basic good" or not) simply do not fill that emptiness at the core of our being for some sort of "meaning" in life. For that, only a satisfying meta-physics provides some sort or relief. Unfortunately, we've become besotted with scientism (science as god which your piece impliedly accepts) and think ourselves too "sophisticated" to believe that, unless you can measure it and mathematize it, it doesn't exist.
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writersbloc
05:56 AM on 04/02/2012
I don't find any discussion of happiness complete without the inclusion of satisfaction, meaning, and engagement.
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doinaheckuvanutjob
Cheering for a permanent Republican minority
11:07 PM on 04/01/2012
I like the sailboat analogy, but not the engineering and economic terms to describe emotional states and life conditions. That's great if it does work for others and helps some people who more easily relate to this kind of terminology. But I think most folks would relate more to terminology that mirrors the meanings in life rather than 'engineering'. Positive psychology, particularly has tackled these issues very well, and explained how to increase fulfillment and perspective to create a more serene outlook on life. Nonetheless, the article is intriguing and I'd like to look further at the book by the authors in the bookstore and see how they flesh out their ideas.
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ConfuciusSay-
Aglets: their purpose is sinister.
01:45 AM on 04/02/2012
Happiness as an economic index is an important paradigm shift, that several nations are beginning to look at. There's a book called the Happiness Manifesto you might want to look at - it was an inexpensive Kindle download and a good, short read.
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doinaheckuvanutjob
Cheering for a permanent Republican minority
01:57 AM on 04/07/2012
Great point, ConfuciusSay, about this important paradigm shift some nations are looking at. The Happiness Manifesto sounds like a worthwhile read, I'll look for it, thanks!
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larry cifuentes
03:26 PM on 04/01/2012
How anyone, whether Masai warrior or American millionaire, could ever be happy, without sense of divine love realization ?
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HUFFPOST COMMUNITY MODERATOR
ConfuciusSay-
Aglets: their purpose is sinister.
01:42 AM on 04/02/2012
I'm in complete ignorance of the meaning of "divine love realization", but am pretty happy at the moment.
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larry cifuentes
09:14 AM on 04/02/2012
Thank you for the instructive response. indeed my statement isn't realy self explanatory.

Thanks for the instructive response. Indeed my statement isn’t self explanatory.
10:47 AM on 04/01/2012
I applaud Profs Manel Baucells and Rakesh Sarin for giving excellent suggestions on how to live a happier life. Interestingly, there are two which coincide with the suggestions in my book series 'Wisdom on How to Live Life': (1) live with less, and (2) live with low or no expectations.
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Damiano Iocovozzi MSN NP
Director, CEO, the Thomas Edwin Walls Foundation
10:44 AM on 04/01/2012
Remedy to a fixated world of status-seeking, power-seeking, celebrity-seeking wrong paths: "live simply, speak kindly, care deeply, love generously."
02:06 AM on 04/03/2012
Damiano: a perfect comment.
10:19 AM on 04/01/2012
I agree with your comments, however, I would like to get your views on happiness and "moods." I am happy most of the time, but different people will affect my "mood" and it's hard to stay in my happy mood. I have read many books about the brain and how we think and how we should react to other people affecting our lives, but it sure is hard to be "upbeat" when you are surrounded by "unhappy," critical, or depressed people. Any advice?
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Nils Montan
Book Fanatic, Social Critic
01:55 PM on 04/01/2012
You should not "try" to be "happy" all the time. That just isn't human. We all have moods and sometimes it can very appropriate to be a little sad or down. That makes life have some true color. Try to stay away from people who are chronically down or who complain all the time. Finally, look inwards. A good connection with some form of meditation and other spiritual practices can really help us have some perspective on life.
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doinaheckuvanutjob
Cheering for a permanent Republican minority
11:14 PM on 04/01/2012
I've faced that problem too, of being around unhappy people, and it eventually affects my state of mind and outlook negatively. I have had to set more boundaries on how much time I spend around that kind of person. That would be my suggestion, if it fits for you. I think it's helped me a lot to give less time, while being kind and tactful about it, not making it about them, but stating my need for my own time and activities. And yes, that can be difficult at times, but I've become so burned out on supporting the depressed that it is now easier to stand my ground on limiting contact, and finding more time for my own activities that are positive and spend more time with others who are a positive influence. That can be sought out by doing activities you like in your community if you are too isolated from positive influences. That's something I've had to do when I found myself isolated, I had to go out more to nurture myself with activities and meeting more positive people in that context.