Here are a baker's dozen of ways in which they offend:
1. They interrupt you in the middle of what you're saying and expect you to listen to them.
2. They interrupt you in the middle of when you're thinking about something without asking if it is a good time to talk and expect you to immediately stop whatever you're thinking about and give them your undivided attention.
3. They take offense when you interrupt them.
4. They expect you to change whatever you're thinking, doing and feeling to what they they you should be thinking, doing and feeling...and for you to do it with a smile and gratitude.
5. They scowl and act hostile, when people accidentally bump into them.
6. If they're walking along the side of a road or on a path and people approach them, they make the other person walk around them.
7. They are easier to upset than they are to please.
8. They rarely say, "I'm sorry" and if they do, they do so insincerely or even begrudgingly.
9. They rarely say, "Thank you" because they feel so entitled.
10. They rarely congratulate you because they are unable to root for anyone else.
11. When they demand something you are afraid to say: "No," because of the hostility it triggers.
12. When they complain about something you are afraid to tell them to "Just deal with it" because you're afraid they'll go ballistic or become coldly sullen and shut down.
13. You're chuckling and agreeing with most of this list, but would be scared stiff to show it to them (a.k.a. you walk on eggshells around them most of the time).
If you live with a narcissist, take care of yourself and if you can, cut your losses, because they almost never change.
If you are a narcissist and have read this far, there is hope for you.
Follow Mark Goulston, M.D. on Twitter: www.twitter.com/markgoulston
Narcissist aren't secretly worried that they might be narcissists, so they wouldn't be searching the Web looking for self-help, self-diagnosis tests. Narcissists usually only seek help when their anti-social behavior puts them in a situation where they are forced to at least attempt to modify how they act, if not how they think.