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Mark Joseph

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Kevin Smith & the Gift Of Honesty

Posted: 02/21/10 02:44 AM ET

Here's the thing about the Kevin Smith Southwest Airlines incident: Instead of complaining about his treatment he should be thanking those flight attendants and that pilot for a moment of honesty that he was probably sorely in need of.

I've never been as big as Smith, but relatively speaking anyway, I wasn't too far off when I tipped the scales at 123 at the tender age of ten years old. Only my wake-up call didn't come from a flight attendant but from a little girl who couldn't have been more than five years old. I was in the middle of a soccer game, intently playing my position (goalie -- what else?) and minding my own business when she walked around the goal post, looked me squarely in the eyes and blurted out, "You're fat!"

I know, I know, psychiatrists are going to say I was traumatized by the incident, but I don't think so. I think it was a gift. A gift of honesty. The kind of gift that big-time directors too often surrounded by sycophants don't often receive.

My five-year old friend was absolutely right. I was fat. And her innocent comment spurred me on to do something about my situation. And if Kevin Smith were smart, instead of twittering insults about Southwest Airlines, he would instead thank those flight attendants for their honesty and use the incident as a chance to improve his health and the comfort of those in the seats next to him on his next flight.

 
 
 

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05:36 PM on 02/24/2010
I am fascinated by the amount of anger focused on overweight people. What happened to compassion and walking a mile in someone else's shoes? People who struggle with their weight do just that...STRUGGLE. They are perfectly aware of their issue and have fought long and hard with it for years...sometimes winning...sometimes losing...but always struggling. In reference to charging overweight people more for an extra seat because their size makes others uncomfortable, if you're going to do that then I think it only fair that the really tall guy who sat behind me on an 11 hour flight to Europe and made it impossible to recline my seat even an inch be required to purchase an extra seat in front of him the next time he flies. Also, lets bounce all screaming babies and unruly children from flights, they annoy me and make my flight VERY uncomfortable....oh! and there was that one time I had to sit next to a kid coming back from Africa after working for the Peace Corps for a year, he wreaked something fierce, my eyes were watering, he should have been escorted off the plane immeadiately. Am I serious? No. Why? Beacuse my partner is tall and I know how hard it is for him to travel, and we hope to have children some day, and that kid seriously couldn't help smelling so bad. Compassion people. Look into it. Air travel is painful at best for everyone. Get over it.
05:12 PM on 02/23/2010
I'll bet that if any one of you fat defenders knew what a 330 lb man ate each and every day to 'maintain' that largess, you would rethink your positions. I have a nehpew that tips at 300. After the 3rd chicken fried steak dinner(at one sitting), I just had to leave. STOP EATING FATTIES. It really is just that simple.
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BlackJAC
It's better to be a black king than a white knight
03:12 PM on 02/22/2010
Don't confuse tactlessness with honesty. As Lionel Hutz once said, there's the truth (angrily shaking his head) and the truth (smiling and nodding).
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canadagirl76
06:44 PM on 02/22/2010
fanned!
02:47 PM on 02/22/2010
Thanks for bringing some sanity to this debate.
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02:25 PM on 02/22/2010
Kevin Smith paid for two seats as required for overweight passengers per the airline's policy. But the flight he booked ended up getting cancelled. The airline was the one who put him on that plane when they only had one seat available.

Smith knows he's fat, that's why he paid for two seats to begin with. Southwest didn't provide him with any lightning bolt of a revelation, instead they set him up for a humiliation and I do not care how fat anyone is....that was a cruel and unnecessary thing to do.
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frankg3400
01:19 PM on 02/23/2010
Sorry, but the flight he booked the two seats was not canceled. Smith decided to fly standby on an earlier flight, which did not have two seats available and booked anyway.

I also find it interesting that Smith has a new movie premiering on Feb 26th, called "Cop Out". Was this all a publicity stunt on Smiths part??
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01:41 PM on 02/23/2010
Why did the airline allow this if he was required to pay for two seats? The airline boarded him and they allowed him to switch flights knowing he had purchased two seats on another flight. Then they kick him off? Sorry....Smith isn't the one at fault here.

I don't think this was publicity stunt unless South West was in on it.
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shryock
It never is what it is anymore
08:12 AM on 02/22/2010
o, dear, mark.
i know you will thank me for my honesty when i tell you you are a jerk, and an unfeeling one at that.
i know you will go home and honestly think over your behavior and change it instantly so that you will not risk being jerky a second time.
it will be good for you to know that you are a jerk, and my comment will spur you on to change your situation.
and perhaps to understand there is a difference between being called fat by a five year old who was probably innocent of malice and being publicly embarrassed by two flight attendants in front of a plane load of people.
i hope other people have taken the time to give you the advice you so sorely need and also told you you are a jerk, and i know that your next column will be a thank you to all the people out here who have done you the kindness of publicly pointing out your flaws. i know there are lots of people out here who are honest enough to do that.
10:53 PM on 02/21/2010
Certainly Mr. Smith *knows* he's fat in the intellectual sense that if he were asked whether he's fat he would respond Yes. And he might very well be able to state his weight, BMI or clothing size.

But that's different than the kind of self realization you get when, for instance, you see a photo or video of yourself taken when you weren't aware of it. It's not the same as the fixed mirror image that you normally see of yourself.

This sort of unexpected third-party *reframing" of your obesity can indeed be new information to the obese person and quite jarring. Mr. Smith experienced a version of this on the airplane. It can be motivating if you take it in a constructive, positive way, but Mr. Smith is not taking it that way.
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Darwinita
Goddess Divine and certainly an acquired taste...
03:09 PM on 02/22/2010
did you read his miiiiiind? How the hell would you know??
10:16 PM on 02/21/2010
Good for you that you lost weight. It is awfuly great of you to get on your soap box and preach to Kevin Smith that this was good for him, that he would be better off losing weight. Maybe he doesn't want to lose, maybe he doesn't care, and your "concern" for him is falling on deaf ears. If people were more concerned about themselves than other people most people would be better. Maybe those women would be more comfortable without Kevin Smith next to him. At the same time maybe Kevin Smith doesn't want your opions about what he sholuld do ivading into his space.
09:27 PM on 02/21/2010
The writer here is sadly misinformed.

Decades of medical data and our own national history prove that longterm weight loss is extremely rare. 85% to 98% of people who lose weight will regain within 2-3 years. Repeatedly losing weight and regaining correlates with poor health and shortened lifespan.

People who lose significant amounts of weight and stay at such lower weights are the exceptions that prove the rule: fat people don't choose to be fat any more than thin people choose to be thin!

Researchers have tried repeatedly to document a difference between the eating of fat people and thin people, with no significant results. Researchers have compared groups of people who exercise routinely to people who do not and find that exercisers only weigh about 10 pounds less than those who are sedentary.

Good nutrition and regular exercise are not magic pills to make us thin, they're magic pills to make us all healthy in our diverse body shapes and heights and weights.

The proper response to prejudice and discrimination (like that exhibited by SouthWorst) is never to expect the people targeted by hate to change in order to please our oppressors. The proper response is for everyone to take our part in dismantling the prejudice. Because pervasive meanness sucks for everyone, whether you fit in the chair on a plane or not.

Crowing about your unearned thin privilege and encouraging segregationist policies? Totally uncool.
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DessLoch
"Gamilon Power!"
01:50 PM on 02/21/2010
Doesn't Kevin Smith have a movie coming out? Cop Out with Bruce Willis and Trac Morgan, looks really funny!
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11:24 AM on 02/21/2010
Knowing that Smith had booked two seat for his original flight, Southwest never should have allowed him to board the earlier flight with only a single seat available. Although the women on either side of him said they were okay with sitting next to him (after he put them on the spot), I suspect they realized the heated nature of the situtation and were just trying to be polite. Smith admits that he weighs 330 pounds. It's a safe bet that both women were relieved to have avoided ceding a portion of their limited space to Smith.
11:55 AM on 02/22/2010
You have absolutely no way of knowing what the women sitting next to him were thinking, or what their intentions were.
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Darwinita
Goddess Divine and certainly an acquired taste...
03:10 PM on 02/22/2010
If I were sitting next to Kevin Smith he could crowd me all he liked.
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06:25 PM on 02/22/2010
I did not state that I knew their sentiments, did I?
10:33 AM on 02/21/2010
Kevin Smith is well aware of his weight as anyone who has seen his question and answer shows will attest. It is a tad condescending to assume that a man with such an impressive body of work would be less aware of his physical body than you were at 10.

There is a price to pay for true art. Kevin Smith’s one spoken line in the movie “Clerks” was one of the best movie lines of all time: “There are a lot of beautiful women in this world, but they don’t all bring you lasagna for lunch”. Had Kevin Smith been more concerned with his weight, he might have said salad instead of lasagna, but who wants a woman who brings him a salad for lunch?
09:44 AM on 02/21/2010
I recommend going to smodcast.com, where Kevin Smith and Scott Mosier do a regular podcast. Smith immediately sat down with his wife when he got home to record things while they were fresh in his mind (definite adult language is used).

It isn't as simple as he was too fat to fly. The customer service was horrendous, with no one ever giving him a straight answer, and what explanations were given were fishy. In the end, one thing is clear - there are no rules the airline puts out there. They wait until you are in your seat and make a subjective judgement there, calling you out in front of the whole plane. From Southwest's own posted guidelines for when a second ticket is required, Kevin Smith did not require one. Additionally, the people he sat next to said they had no problem with him sitting there.

By the time he got to fly again, the twittering was going on, and Southwest was realizing what happened and was working to placate him. Yet, besides that, when he boards a plane a couple gates away (where certainly they knew what happened), they did the same thing to a woman sitting next to him. Which makes you wonder, how often does it happen? And with the vague guidelines, is it a safety issue, or a case of forcing someone to buy a second ticket or lose their flight?
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CindyV
09:20 AM on 02/21/2010
I hate to tell you this, but fat people know they are fat. What they don't need is some airline seating them, then kicking them off the plane. Fat people don't need to be treated poorly by anyone, including you.
08:48 AM on 02/21/2010
You don't get it - he was ALLOWED on the plane initially, was seated, without belt extender. Once he was happily seated, he was chucked off the plane! Shoddy treatment of a paying customer!!