"Let's Twist Again": Right-wing Bloggers Smear HuffPost

A much wiser person than I once asked rhetorically "How do you explain bad taste to people who haven't got ANY taste?"

I have been reminded of that question as I watch with bemusement the right-wing blogosphere getting its knickers in a twist over my column that presented a tongue-in-cheek open letter to General Peter Pace suggesting that he arrest George W. Bush for "Conduct Unbecoming". It was of course just 'a modest proposal'...

Anyone who has read "Gulliver's Travels" (even the 'Comics Illustrated' version from Regnery Publishing for the "challenged reader") is aware of a little thing called satire. Perhaps has even heard of Jonathan Swift.

But it appears that the only "Swift" that the right-wing nuts have heard of is the Swift Boat.

Swift = Smear they understand.

Swift = Satire...? Well, let's just be charitable and say that it "eludes" them.

The wing-nut world is up in arms (in some cases literally) with calls for me to be tried for sedition and treason. Some want me deported. Others are advocating hanging or shooting against a wall. Worst of all -- someone wants the FBI to open a file on me. (And I thought that the FBI was busy with important matters...)

But how do you explain satire to people who are uncontaminated by either wit or wisdom?

And of course -- as befits those who worship at the shrine of Atwater and Rove -- my satire has been twisted into headlines such as "HuffPo Calls For Military Coup In USA" Yup -- these guys are the Chubby Checkers of politics. They sure know how to twist... Again and again.

If there is even a single person left in the progressive/liberal/Democratic world who doubts how vicious and malevolent these people will be in their desperate attempt to retain the White House and regain Congress next year -- be aware now. These people will literally stop at nothing. 2000, 2004 and 2006 will seem like church picnics compared to how dirty they will fight the 2008 elections.

I'm just a minor satirist on a small soapbox -- and they came after me with all the ferocity of the Bush administration chasing Bin Laden... (Note to right-wing-nuts: That was what we elite, effete snobs -- who CAN hold a candle -- call:'litotes')

After all that they have done to Bill Clinton, Al Gore, John Kerry, Max Cleland and many more -- I got off very lightly. I was only threatened with murder a couple of times. But what gutter smears will these people come up with to demonize Democratic candidates next year?

And will the mainstream media fulfill its obligation to the American people to stand up and denounce and debunk these Un-American Activities?

Incidentally, I reference Swift above in respect of a time-honored genre much cherished by us Brits -- and not as any claim to the caliber of writing. No one approaches the genius of Swift. However my taste for Swiftian humor is a reflection of over 34 years working as a producer, writer and performer of comedic material. And is reflected in the majority of my columns for Huffington Post and TIME.com before that.

A couple of the wing-nuts wondered who I was. Some roundly condemned me for being British (guilty as charged), accused me of hating America (quite the reverse -- I love this country -- and long for its government to be restored to decent patriots). They also wondered what other "seditious" material I had written.

You might have thought that the fact that over the past year -- one click away to anyone reading me on Huffington Post -- I have announced that: Dick Cheney had died and been replaced with a lookalike cyborg; that the Libby conviction VINDICATED George Bush; that the president was actually Austin Powers' nemesis Dr. Evil; that Dick Cheney had praised Al Gore for pardoning Bill Clinton; that George Bush had had a recent written exchange with the Founding Fathers; that Denny Hastert had been a dancing partner of Fred Astaire; and that I had also written open letters to Senator George Allen giving him tips on how to be Jewish -- and to the president's dog Barney... Not to mention re-writing Monty Python's "Dead Parrot" sketch as the Iraqi "Dead Policy" sketch -- would have given these people a vague clue.

And as if that wasn't enough -- my HuffPo bio describes me as a humorist and references that I have worked as a producer with Monty Python, Peter Cook, Dudley Moore, Rowan Atkinson and Billy Connolly.

But -- like the callow charlatan they are defending to the bitter (29% approval and dropping) end -- they are literally Without A Clue.

Anyway -- for the benefit of the Hard-Of-Thinking -- I thought I would provide an easy-to-navigate selection of some of my other "seditious" posts from the past 12 months that they may wish to submit to the FBI.

A Year In The Life Of A Satirist...

(A Selection of Martin Lewis columns on Huffington Post)

• Cheney's "Iraq Flip-Flop" Explained: DICK IS DEAD! (August 18, 2007)

• Scooter Hilton! Getting Out Of Jail Free (June 7, 2007)

• Terrible Blow For Bush From Blair... (May 17, 2007)

• Mass Debate (May 3, 2007)

• Reminder: What America Lost In 1776... (March 27, 2007)

• Alberto Gonzales: You're Like A Rolling Stone... (March 20, 2007)

• Help Update Scooter Libby's Website! (March 7, 2007)

• Libby Verdict Vindicates Bush! (March 6, 2007)

• Appoint Anna Nicole Smith judge to the Supreme Court! (February 15, 2007)

• The Late Peter Cook Exonerates Scooter Libby! (February 14, 2007)

• Dick-Aid! Help Cheney find some new friends!(February 9, 2007)

• Libby & Russert: The Crutch Shots!(February 7, 2007)

• Dr. Bush: Delivering A 500 Billion Dollar Baby... (January 12, 2007)

• Bush Meets Monty Python! (January 11, 2007)

• Rearranging The Deckchairs On Bush's Titanic... (January 5, 2007)

• Cheney slams GOP - and praises Gore's pardon of Clinton! (January 2, 2007)

• WELL HUNG! Saddam Hung To Prove Bush is BETTER Hung... (Than His Dad) (December 29, 2006)

• Help Bush Drink Again... (December 15, 2006)

• Bush Finally Asks To Be Excused... (December 4, 2006)

• Shock GOP TV spot! Vote Republican or.... (October 20, 2006)

• Bush's election appeal to the Founding Fathers! (October 11, 2006)

• Denny Hastert - the GOP's Fred Astaire (October 5, 2006)

• Time for GOP to "ex-Foley-ate"... (October 4, 2006)

• Mark Foley: "My Back Pages..." (September 29, 2006)

• Desperate plea to Laura Bush (& Barney The Dog) (September 29, 2006)

• Exclusive: CIA phone tap of Armitage's "Stone Age" threat to Pakistan! (September 22, 2006)

• Mazeltov George Allen! (Letter to the newly 'circumscribed'!) (September 21, 2006)

• Exclusive! Bush Speech Mix-up! (September 20, 2006)

Follow Martin Lewis on Twitter: www.twitter.com/TheMartinLewis

Comments

[numptyboy]

Nice one. I'm not sure why you yourself would want to satirise (a la Swift) the more deranged end of the anti-Bush camp by taking their fevered rantings to such an extreme, but hey - it takes big chunky knackers to laugh at yourself. :)

[harry9000]

Welcome to your "Sheryl Crow moment". Like Crow, your silly idea got panned even by other liberals. You even sound as defensive about it.

[fugazi]

Nice try. In typical liberal effete, elite snob fashion you have been called on your ridiculous, asinine, and probably illegal call for a military insurrection by claiming "satire".

And yet you answered almost every post calling you on your nonsense by defending your call for a military coup, in a deadly serious fashion. Over and over in the comments section you called for Mr. Pace to "place President Bush under military arrest". That is what is called a "coup".

Come on, Martin. Stand by your post.

You, sir, are a coward. Typical.

==========MARTIN RESPONDS=========

I stand by my satirical piece. And by my deadpan responses to all the credulous people who reacted to it. Get over it. Start preparing for next year's landslide against the Neanderthals!

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[Bombast]

I'm a left leaning independent (which means I voted against G.W.Bush every time I got the chance) and my oldest copy of Swift is the 1925 Mott edition of Gulliver's Travels. I'm a union member (WGA) and made a living writing comedy for about 12 years.

I thought you were serious. I just didn't believe you were an actual threat to anyone. It read like one more Chimpy McBusHitler 9/11 TROOTH rant, and there are at least 50 of those each day.

Satire has to be over the top. Your modest proposal is mild compared to serious daily postings at Kos, DU, Firedog Lake and here.

I came to my conclusion without having read your previous work. It is certainly more absurd, and had I known you as a satirist I would have assumed it to be a failed attempt at humor, rather than the ravings of (yet another) lunatic. I apologize for not knowing your oeuvre, I had simply never come across your work before.

Remember what Orwell said of Swift in "Politics vs Literature." "Swift was one of those people who are driven into a sort of perverse Toryism by the follies of the progressive party of the moment." Swift was "a Tory Anarchist, despising authority while disbelieving in liberty."

Orwell concluded "In a political and moral sense, I am against him, so far as I understand him." Between the two, I'd rather have Orwell as my roll model.

[WasatchMan]

And how long did Arianna beat you about the head and shoulders before you posted this ridiculous disclaimer?

============MARTIN RESPONDS===========

You must be confusing this website with something on the right wing. My follow-up post was solely my idea. I had no conversations or correspondence on the topic of doing so with anyone. Period. However when I realized how thoroughly stupid - or (more probably) disingenuous - the rightwing nuts were becoming - I thought I'd try a little enlightenment. Not that anything can penetrate. Enjoy next year's landslide! I know I will...

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[MelFamy]

I just wanted to say that it is good to see Martin and Lewis together again. What a team you two make!

[JustAnotherJoe]

The funniest part was the pictures of all of Pace's medals and campaign ribbons on one small part of his jacket and Bush's entire jacket without even a speck of lint. The operative words here are clever and entertaining, which automatically leaves Coulter, Limbaugh, ad nauseum, out of any conversation about satire. But one small question, would it really be considered a coup if Pace told the military to do nothing, you know, not take over anything, but take a few well deserved weeks off and go on vacation? Not that I'm advocating peace or anything potentially unconstitutional, or seditious, here.

[rsrobinson]

I have a feeling your genius plan involving General Pace came to you suddenly about three bong hits into a creative brainstorming session with fellow Hollywood artistes. Since there's probably no one around you in that town to tell you what a dumb idea it was you decided to share your idea for getting rid of Bush with the masses. When that didn't quite go like you thought it would it suddenly became "satirical" piece, albeit one completely devoid of anything resembling humor.

=========MARTIN RESPONDS=========

So you took the visuals at the bottom of the column showing their medals as part of a serious letter I would actually send did you?! Thanks for letting us understand what you clearly didn't....

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[zona9]

Yes, because there was nothing even remotely funny about the pictures. They were just a visual to illustrate your point. No satire. None.

[Pressto]

If this was suppose to be a "political satire" why did you respond and defend your position in so many of the comments on the story?

==========MARTIN RESPONDS==­==========

Because I can. And because it amused me. As does your interest. Any more questions sonny?

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[zona9]

Don't forget people to go read the original thread and comments. See for yourselves..

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/martin-lewis/general-pace-you-can-sa_b_61785.html

[BinBaldwin]

Lewis is an extremist nut . Pure Disgrace to America and the US Constitution.

============MARTIN RESPONDS==­==========

Your comment is up there with Elvis complaining to Nixon that the Beatles were "unAmerican"!

Thanks for the laugh!

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[Jaibones]

I'm loving the junior high humor of your "last word" comments. This is something I had missed -- are all the SnuffPost readers this stupid?

============MARTIN REPONDS============

Are the regular Huffington Post readers as stupid as to miss the appearance of interaction and comments?

No.

But thank you for letting us know that you had missed them.

Good luck with the literacy classes.

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[CommieKazi]

The original article was not satire. It was serious. And now you insult those who call you out on it. Ha-ha, almost funny. In a non-satirical way, I mean.

==========MARTIN RESPONDS===========

And what was serious about the medal comparison photos at the foot of the satire? Would you attach such a clearly satirical set of visuals to a serious letter?! It is apparent that this all eluded you. Sorry about that!

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[CommieKazi]

You know what, you can play your games all day long, and keep attempting to delude the readers here into believing that you were in jest, but as your own words in the original article indicated, and how strongly you defended it in your replies to comments about it, leave NO doubt that you were sincere. The article was not written as satire.

The fact that HuffPost is hosting this nonsense indicates only one thing:

You and HuffPost hit bottom, yet you keep digging.

Dig on, Martin.

========MARTIN RESPONDS==­==========­=

1) Smart move by you not answering my question. An honest answer would tend to incriminate you. And undercut your flawed premise.

2) Deluded people ARE the bottom of our society. So it's always a pleasure to hit bottom. Who knows - maybe some brain cells will get dislodged... Proximity to the brain etc etc

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[rsrobinson]

Generally it's common practice for a satirist to include at least a hint of humor and irony in their satire. Your post contained not a whiff of either.
Another problem is that it's virtually indistinguishable from any number of other lunatic ideas promoted regularly on the port-side of the blogosphere that makes lefty blogs all but parody-proof (except for Liberal Larry at Blame Bush!) So it was perfectly reasonable to believe that your post was a real suggestion by someone who's been living inside the Hollywood bubble so long that he's lost touch with the real world. It's not as if that affliction is unknown here at HuffPo, after all.

===========MARTIN RESPONDS=========

Your inability to discern wit is noted and stipulated. Try MAD Magazine...

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[JFHill]

And in the era of the military coup movies: Dr. Strangelove, Seven Days in May, The Life of Henry Kissenger, it was the wrong wing which encouraged and led these coups; my personal favorite being the Overthrow of Chilean Democracy and the Murder of Salvadore Allende, which got five stars (a number since retired) and the Franco Prize at the Chiang Kai-Chek Film Festival in 1974.

Now the military coup is anathema to them, but only at home, which is an improvement, though not perfect.

I must add, the more interesting statistic would be the number of respondents who thought it would be a good idea. Maybe, just maybe....

[BigFella]

These people, these ultra-conservative, right wing demagogues know no humor. Even when they try to be humorous, they can't even buy an audience: http://indefatigable-indolence.org/blog1/?p=162

That bit of "political satire" referenced above has already been cancelled, it is a dead duck.

These people are severely lacking in imagination, integrity, and never have had the ability to think outside of the box, they just adhere to the right wing, corporate agenda of their party and are too mean spirited to understand satire, let alone engage in it.

For them it is always just kill, or be killed.

[Rescisco]

Why dignify the mighty righty wing-nut world with a reply? They don't understand satire, they don't understand anything really, so why respond....unless it is to encourage them to say more incredibly silly things that you can use...ah, you clever lad!

========MARTIN RESPONDS==========

Busted!

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