- Work (in a bipartisan way, of course) with the National Rifle Association to arm America's 50 million uninsured and give them a ticket to Washington.
- Require every senior Wall Street banker to personally cover 1000 uninsured families (cost: just13 million a year!)
- If Conan can be paid $30 million not to host The Tonight Show, can't some Democratic billionaire offer Scott Brown $31 million (one dollar for every uninsured American who stands to get covered by the bill) not to take his seat, forcing another special election in Massachusetts?
- Ask China to demand health care's passage because we need its deficit reduction to start paying them back all the money we've borrowed.
- Pass it with 59 votes as an act of civil disobedience, let Republicans sue, and take the tyranny of the minority to the court of public opinion.
- Bring back Hillary to negotiate a deal. She's rested, she's ready, and she learned her lesson in 1994.
- Tell Republicans you'll sign any plan they offer that the CBO certifies will cover at least 30 million of the uninsured.
- Run wall-to-wall ads featuring Scott Brown's nude centerfold until he says "uncle."
- Promise to run wall-to-wall ads featuring Scott Brown's nude centerfold if he signs on.
- Ask Congress to put the Bob Dole-Howard Baker-Tom Daschle bipartisan blueprint for universal coverage to an up-or-down vote. Seriously.
Top Ten Things Democrats Should Do Before Abandoning Ambitious Health Care Reform