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Maya Rupert

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Is Marriage Equality for White People?

Posted: 10/11/11 05:27 PM ET

After the discouraging passage of California's Proposition 8 in 2008, the widespread speculation that the success of the anti-marriage equality initiative was due to the black voter turnout prompted some disturbing and racist rhetoric about the relationship between communities of color and the lesbian, gay, bisexual, and transgender (LGBT) community. Even after it was widely discredited that the black turnout could be responsible for the passage of Prop 8, the conventional wisdom has remained that the issue of marriage equality is simply not something that appeals to voters of color.

This narrative is untrue, and it is time we stop acting like marriage equality is only for white people. In fact, the fight for marriage equality is very much a fight about racial justice. Opponents of marriage equality are waging a culture war and, while the LGBT community may be the stated target, families of color are and will continue to be the collateral damage.

The proposed North Carolina state constitutional amendment that, if passed in 2012, would bar any legal recognition or protection for same-sex couples provides a perfect example. In addition to barring gay people from marriage, the North Carolina measure is written in broad terms that will have a devastating impact on all of North Carolina's unmarried couples. This law would strip legal protections from all nontraditional family arrangements which, as I've argued elsewhere, is a particular concern for families of color, who are more likely to be in unmarried relationships. And North Carolina is no exception. According to the 2010 Census, there are 222,800 unmarried couples living in the state. While only 12 percent of those couples are same sex, almost a quarter of them are black.

If passed, the North Carolina constitutional amendment will be just as devastating to the black community in North Carolina as it will be to the LGBT community, if not more so. The law would constitutionally prohibit any legal protections being given to unmarried black couples, which could include domestic violence protections, impact child custody and visitation, and make it harder for unmarried parents to protect their families if one person is hospitalized.

It is no wonder that, according to a recent poll, a solid majority -- 61 percent -- of blacks in North Carolina oppose or strongly oppose the constitutional amendment. Despite that fact, some leaders in North Carolina have used thinly veiled race-baiting to try to divide these communities on this issue. Thus, instead of focusing on how the black and LGBT community must work together to defeat this measure, the focus has been on whether a comparison between the struggle for marriage quality and the Civil Rights Movement is ever appropriate. That debate is a distraction. Of course these two movements are not the same, but the impulse to discriminate - the one that convinces some people that equality is a scarce commodity that can only be provided to some - is the same impulse at the root of racial discrimination, LGBT discrimination, and discrimination against every minority community. And we must combat that impulse in all forms.

For its part, the LGBT community must do a better job of talking about marriage equality in communities of color. Too often there is an implication that the denial of marriage equality is the only or the worst way that families are denied equal protection and recognition by law and public policy. This rings false -- and, often, insulting -- to many communities of color that have dealt for generations with legislative, policy, and legal efforts to undermine the legitimacy and dignity of families of color. When the LGBT community is perceived as placing the issue of marriage equality in a privileged position in public policy debate as a unique harm suffered only by LGBT families, communities of color are sent the message that the ways their families are denied legitimacy are being discounted or ignored.

For example, there are efforts to repeal and revise the Fourteenth Amendment based on a racist and xenophobic narrative that attacks the legitimacy of immigrant families, a cynical and concerted effort to limit reproductive freedom for women of color by insinuating that, by advocating for choice, they are being complicit in their own racial genocide, and policies underlying welfare reform and social benefits that are based upon the assumption of an inherently unstable black family.

We must talk about marriage equality in terms that acknowledge a broader fight for family recognition and strengthen the natural alliance between communities of color and the LGBT community.

 

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After the discouraging passage of California's Proposition 8 in 2008, the widespread speculation that the success of the anti-marriage equality initiative was due to the black voter turnout prompted s...
After the discouraging passage of California's Proposition 8 in 2008, the widespread speculation that the success of the anti-marriage equality initiative was due to the black voter turnout prompted s...
 
 
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ATLJunBug
08:05 PM on 10/20/2011
I don't even know how to comment on this issue. Black Gay issues are so complicated because of racial depression and Gay education. We have come a long way, but yet, have a long way to go. Religion has paid a great part in how Black people view gay issues. However, I believe that things are changing with the younger generation of Black children who are willing to come out. Believe it or not, there are many, many, many Black young, middle age and elderly gay people who are still in the closet because of the fear of losing their families because of the family's religious beliefs. I would encourage Gay organizations to purposely reach out into the Black community educating them about Gay issues. And especially reach out into the Black Gay community with love and acceptance and understanding. Just talking about it is not the answer. "United We Stand, Divided We Fall."
01:27 AM on 10/15/2011
This is beautiful. Thank You so much for bringing this to light. Also, Dan Savage annoys everyone not just black people (he annoys bisexuals and transgender people as well)--I know this wasn't largely talked about in your article, but he was the one saying racist things because of what he wrongly perceived was the cause of the proposition 8 outcome. Anyway, great article. As a bisexual woman of color the idea that lgbt rights is only a "white issue" or only majorly relates to white people bugs me.
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nix28
Ignorance stirs my inner demon...Sorry.
03:04 PM on 10/14/2011
Excellent article and I wholeheartedly agree. Marriage is a right that all people should have, regardless of sexual preference.
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11:08 AM on 10/14/2011
The best evidence of this is that on the day New York first allowed gay marriage, I saw dozens of LGBT people of color in the south Bronx lining up to get married. http://www.dominionofnewyork.com/2011/07/25/the-bronx-celebrates-gay-marriag/#.TphP1psr2so One couple I met, but didn't feature came all the way from Georgia to do the dam thing. With black voters so disenchanted with the political process and voter turnout so low, you can't trust Prop 8 pollsters on this. Some of them are the very ppl working hard to suppress our voting.
08:14 PM on 10/13/2011
The people that create these false arguments are great at pitting groups against one another.

The LGBT community blames the African American community for not supporting marriage equality. African Americans say the LGBT community has ignored social injustices (profiling, unfair drug laws, police killing unarmed black men, death penalty, poor schools, etc.) perpetuated against them.

Then those who have created these false arguments celebrate their continued success at oppressing both groups.
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22Keys
01:39 PM on 10/12/2011
70% of African-Americans who voted in California in 2008 supported prop 8. While this was surely nor enough to blame the community for prop 8 passing, it is still a disturbingly large percentage.
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Jeffrey Marks
03:20 PM on 10/12/2011
And in MD, the black churches took credit for killing a marriage equality bill.
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22Keys
04:08 PM on 10/12/2011
Given the immense history of discrimination that people of color have had in this country it is quite disconcerting to see people of color be the first to discriminate against gays.
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mchcallow
Celebrating 145 years: 14th Amendment
08:05 PM on 10/16/2011
Yes, in MD there and a number of states to the south and the west the Souther Baptists churches came together to support evangelicals to block access to marriage equality. While this may be true that this segment of the 'Black' population voted the way that it did, the argument that most or all 'Black' folk would vote this way is essentialist and an overgeneralization as much as it would to say that because Evangelicals came out in droves that this is an indications that 'all' Christians support bigotry.

Again, I'm queer of color and just destabalizing 'truth'...
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Gaaltero
Conscious Black Man
09:26 PM on 10/12/2011
Gay white think basicaly along the same lines against Blacks as their non-gay white counterparts.

Here's one of your comments:

“I hate giving cons anything, unfortunat­ely on this one, I do. East Asians and Jews were subjected to discrimina­tion for quite some time in this country. Today they are among the most economical­ly successful groups in this country. What did they do? Let's not be coy here, educationa­l attainment is the great equalizer that Herman Cain is refering to is educationa­l attainment­.”
01:38 PM on 10/12/2011
Unfortunately, the LBGT community doesn't have the support of other minority groups to aid our cause. Every citizien should be diligent and watchdog in protecting their rights including those that on the surface seemingly do not apply to oneself. If one would only consider, do I know someone affected by this law or denial or freedom? Most people do..a friend, a co-worker, a relative, a neighbor, your physician, your mail carrier...etc. We are all affected and connected.

Shame on NC for it's attempt at denial of rights for more than those "intended".

Wake up, my people!
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10:44 PM on 10/12/2011
The Civil Rights campaign made one thing very clear to those who took to the streets to end their disenfranchisement. That one thing was that there was an entire nation and its representatives that stood against them. A word to the wise and all that.
07:42 PM on 10/11/2011
I'm Black, Gay and married. Shame on Virginia and other states for not recognizing my marriage, while taking my tax dollars and being defended by me(vet). I don't want special rights. I want the same rights afforded heterosexuals.
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Ioan Lightoller
Proud Gay Pagan Man, Living Happily With Husband
06:18 AM on 10/13/2011
Fanned and faved. I am so tired of the "gay agenda" meme. If it exists, it consists of one word: EQUALItY. Apparently we are good enough to pay taxes and bleed/die in war, but not good enough to extend the protections and rights of legal marriage to.
06:24 PM on 10/11/2011
Just to clarify some misconceptions....

Yes on Prop 8 was about restoring the prior definition of marriage that 4 activist judges struck down. Unlike other states already provided equality in California Family Code, section 297.5 (a) which reads "Registered domestic partners shall have the same rights, protections, and benefits, and shall be subject to the same responsibilities, oblications, and duties under law, whether they derive from statues, administrative regulations, court rules, government policies, common law, or any other provisions or sourcesof law, as are granted to and imposed upon spouses."

No on 8 is about forcing and mandating a viewpoint
Given the law cited above there is no need for same-sex marriage at all in California. No on 8 is really about supremacy to some degree. The intention is to indoctrinate children at an early age to help normalize gay lifestyles. This leads to introducing sexuality subject matter to 5 year olds. This is one of many trickle down effects of legalizing same-sex marriage.

Given the trials our country is going through this is a colossal waste of time. The issue is too divisive and polarizing.

What needs to happen is for same-sex marriage to be replacement with some other name that has equal protections just like or better than what california already has.

So lets end the negativity on both sides and just work together on what we have in common and get this country back on its feet again.
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Ioan Lightoller
Proud Gay Pagan Man, Living Happily With Husband
11:05 PM on 10/11/2011
You're the ones doing the polarizing. You were determined to ram marriage inequality into law. Actually marriafe equality IS necessary. Domestic Partnerships do not give all the rights of legal civil marriage.And it is a not a "lifestyle". It is our lives that you so arrogantly dismiss and minimalize with that term "lifestyle". As for indoctrination people like you feel entitled to indoctrinate your children to the point that when they have a gay child, coming out is a living hell for that child.

How have GLBTs ever harmed you?
How would our right to legal civil marriage affect your life.
11:18 PM on 10/11/2011
No. What needs to happen is for ALL citizens to be treated equally before the law - and that means marriage, not some newly minted word or institution. Your 'separate but equal' proposal isn't equal, and it does nothing for Federal recognition, nor does it respect either the Full Faith & Credit Clause OR the Equal Protections Clause of the Constitution.

This is in no way a "colossal waste of time". You aren't the one who's rights and freedoms are being infringed upon.

Your disdain for treating gays equally 'shines' through your words. Those "activist judges" [Spit!, eh?] are doing their job - determining the Constitutionality of legislation. "indoctrinate" "lifestyles" sorry, but YOU and your anti-equality ideology are the polarizing and divisive factors here.
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Wayne Peterson
04:55 PM on 10/11/2011
It should be required in those states that have banned SSM that they recite the Pledge of Allegiance differently, so as to avoid hypocrisy. In those states, the Pledge should conclude....."....with Liberty and Justice for Some".