Unless you've been away on a silent meditation retreat, you've surely heard about (if not seen) KONY 2012, the short documentary by non-profit Invisible Children's cofounder Jason Russell. Posted to YouTube on March 5, it is considered the most viral video of all time, having garnered a spectacular 56 million views in just four days and generating hundreds of thousands of dollars in donations on the first day alone.
After seeing a multitude of posts on Facebook, I sat down two weeks ago to view the film myself. I was horrified by the story Russell told of Lord's Resistance Army leader Joseph Kony's merciless preying upon innocent children in Uganda and, more recently, the Democratic Republic of Congo and South Sudan. For decades, the warlord has been kidnapping boys to serve as soldiers in his militia and forcing girls to be sex slaves. Invisible Children and the UN War Crimes Tribunal want Kony captured and brought to justice.
But as I was celebrating Invisible Children's accomplishment, I began to notice the comments flowing in from other YouTube users. Many of them were attacks along the lines of: "Warning: fraud" and "This does nothing to help!" (Comments on the video have since been disabled.) I felt shocked and disturbed by the vehemence of people's hateful remarks.
In the days that followed, I read numerous tweets and several blogs accusing Russell and Invisible Children of simplifying the situation in Uganda, misusing funds, perpetuating the idea that helpless Africans need Westerners to save them, and encouraging "slacktivism."
Again, the vindictiveness of the attacks bothered me. For nine years, Invisible Children has been raising awareness of a horrendous problem -- and the funds to fix it. What's there to hate about that?
Thankfully, several famous people leapt to the organization's defense, including Nicholas Kristof of The New York Times and Bono. But the whole episode left me with a bad taste in my mouth. I couldn't stop turning this question over in my mind:
Why is it that people love to be haters?
I awoke at 3 a.m. with an idea bouncing around the walls of my brain like a ping-pong ball. I turned on my bedside lamp and began scribbling notes in my journal. My husband Kiran grumbled, "What are you doing, my love?" When I told him, he said, "Well, it's not like being a hater is anything new. I've been reading the biography of Cleopatra. People loved to hate on her, accusing her of being a slut and a whore. They attacked her vigorously because she was a powerful woman."
Then Kiran started singing "My Wave" by Soundgarden: "Hate, if you want to hate; if it keeps you safe; if it makes you brave."
So here is my thought: "Hateration" (as Mary J. Blige so brilliantly labeled it in her hit song "Family Affair"), is an ego-driven response to shame: our feelings that we haven't lived up to our own standards, and that therefore we aren't good enough. As a result, other people's success, efforts, and good deeds make us feel smaller. When we have that gut-level, animalistic reaction of wanting to hate on something, it means we've triggered an area of self-loathing within ourselves. But most of the time, we're way too afraid to go there and admit what it is that we've done to disappoint ourselves. It's easier to blame others for our bad feelings and make it about their failures rather than our own.
Coincidentally, I watched Brene Brown's TED talk from February, which addresses the topic of shame. Brown calls shame "the swampland of the soul."
Shame, Brown tells us, is an epidemic -- one that is highly correlated with addiction, aggression, depression, anxiety, suicide, and eating disorders. A little shame is a good thing; having it means we're not sociopaths. But shame can overwhelm us and put us in a straightjacket. It's the inner critic that says, "I'm a mistake." It keeps us from connecting deeply with others and achieving our goals.
The antidote to shame, according to Brown? Douse it with empathy and vulnerability (also the subject of her viral TEDxHouston talk). "Vulnerability is not weakness," says Brown. "It is our most accurate measurement of courage... It is the birthplace of innovation, creativity, and change." We need to be able to sit with each other in our fear and really listen. Vulnerability is key to living in a whole-hearted, joyful way.
I know this is the case because I have experienced it myself. When I was in my early 30s and going through my divorce, I found myself lashing out in anger at the world. I was pissed at my ex-husband, pissed at being the only one of my friends whose marriage hadn't worked out, pissed that I wasn't having children when I wanted them more than anything. I noticed how this anger -- which stemmed directly from my shame about the divorce -- tainted my reactions to people and events. It made me more likely to criticize, less likely to embrace with an open heart.
When I spoke with my therapist about this problem, she suggested: "Lead with your vulnerability." Such simple, powerful words. But I swear, adopting this mantra turned my life around. Instead of trying to hide my pain, I began revealing it openly. "I'm struggling," I'd say to my friends and family. "I need your support. This is a difficult time for me." And of course they were there for me, with love and compassion in abundance.
I grew so enamored of leading with my vulnerability that I started blogging about my trials and tribulations, first for Intent.com, now for The Huffington Post. "The Life Out Loud" is how I've branded my columns because I speak so freely about the lessons I learn by coming face-to-face with my fears and failures.
So, where does this leave us in terms of being haters?
Skepticism undoubtedly serves us well. We can't believe everything we see in the media, as evidenced by This American Life's retraction this week of the Mike Daisey story attacking Apple for its horrific factory conditions in China. But we can express our criticisms and differences of opinion without hating on other people, ever. Especially when they're making heroic efforts on behalf of humanity.
The next time you feel the instinct to make a particularly harsh remark about another's work, pause and ask yourself where that response is coming from. Instead of lashing out, turn inward. Can you connect your anger or righteous indignation to your own shame? If so, what might it feel like to sit with that pain? Or even better, to share it with someone you trust?
Finally, take a step back and appreciate what this person or organization or nation that is troubling you is trying to accomplish in the first place. It takes a great deal of courage to make a video or write a blog, and far more to follow your passion and make a difference in the world, stand up for your beliefs, enact change. Have you accomplished anything like what Jason Russell has, running a non-profit for nine years? It isn't necessary to take such radical action to feel good about yourself, but you can stop hating and start being inspired.
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I applaud Invisible Children for what they have done, and urge all of those armchair critics--most of whom have never done anything to help Africa--to turn their often half-baked criticism into action which creates an impact.
Great article from a Ugandan. There are many like this and they aren't hateful. Thankfully!
Jason is my friend and an inspiring one at that. Please think twice before you say something so flippantly.
I am much more inspired by young people who do the hard work required for self-realization and who chose to live an authentic life, true to themselves and their sexual identity, regardless of what their friends, church or parents believe. It is the basis of all integrity.
I wanted to make a point to illustrate that the author's ideas about the consequences of harboring self-loathing or experiencing shame for extended periods of time are just as toxic for Jason Russell as they are for the so-called "haters." And far from wanting him to burn, many of his critics would whole heartedly support him if he decided to come forward (or out) and "lead with his vulnerabilities" as the author recommends. It would be a real sign he is on the road to recovery and on the path to wisdom and maturity. I wish him success.
Unfortunately, from the start Invisible Children's efforts seemed to align very neatly with US geostrategic interests in Sub-Saharan Africa -- interests which often have little to do with the well being of people who live there.
While IC trumpets the admittedly horrific crimes of Kony's LRA, overlooked is the ongoing conflict in the Congo, which is generally acknowledged to be driven by foreign powers interested in plundering the vast natural and mineral resources of the region. Up to six million civilians have died, and two of the big culprits have been United States allies, Uganda and Rwanda. Invisible Children enjoyed support from the Ugandan government from very early in IC's existence, and we have to wonder: why?
I'd urge curious readers to view this 1/2 hour documentary, "Crisis In The Congo", which presents a radically different perspective, a sharp contrast to Invisible Children's Kony-centric frame:
www.youtube.com/watch?v=vLV9szEu9Ag”
I appreciate you views. I know there are differing views on every issue. I do know that IC has been on the ground in Uganda for years and is now working in the DRC. The staff consists of both Ugandans and Americans working together to address the needs. IC has not tried to impose its will in Africa. When Jason, Laren, and Bobby first went to Uganda, they saw the people living in internment camps and wanted to help. Their idea was to build a gym for the kids, as they had nothing to do. Young idealists. BUT, they listened to the people, who said, NO, we don't want a gym, we want our children to go to school. So that's what they set out to do. Listen to the people and work with them. Do what the Ugandans wanted for their people, not what they thought they needed. And that has been how they have operated ever since. They work in conjunction with the locals and have made connections with government official in order to be able to carry out their programs. I do encourage you to fully examine their website to see all of the programs instituted in Uganda and the DRC. Check out the staff and their bios. These are educated people who research everything they do. You may disagree with what they do, but their motives are pure. Best wishes.
People complaining that the Kony 2012 video is oversimplified have conveniently forgotton that most of its viewers have the attention span of a gnat. Another gripe is that Kony is no longer in Uganda (this fact is clearly stated in the video!).
As for Invisible Children - the charity has respectable ratings from Charity Navigator. Anyone who doesn't bother researching a charity before donating deserves to be relieved of their money pronto.
Stop projecting, people, and do something worthwhile for humanity instead sitting on your lazy asses in front of a computer screen spewing venom
2) American government is more dangerous than Kony ever was.
3) He is guilty until proven innocent because now people think they know about Africa from watching a 30 minute propaganda peace.
4) The western governments just want their NATURAL RESOURCES!
To learn more about the current activity of the LRA, visit www.LRAcrisistracker.com for real time updates. This just won "best in show" at a crisis tracker conference in Geneva. It's reliable and a great resource.
In regards to his guilt, the film advocates that Kony face a fair trial at the International Crimal Court. Justice and guilt can be determined there.
"Crisis In The Congo: Uncovering The Truth"
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vLV9szEu9Ag
By many informed accounts, the government of Uganda has committed human rights abuses to rival or even exceed those of Kony and his LRA. Writes Milton Allimadi, of the NYC-based Blackstar News service, in a March 8, 2011 Blackstar News editorial,
"Kony is a nightmare, but Museveni has caused the deaths of millions of people in Rwanda, Uganda and Congo. In 2005 the International Court of Justice found Uganda liable for what amounts to war crimes in Congo: mass rapes of both women and men; disemboweling pregnant women; burning people inside their homes alive; massacres and; plunder of resources. Congo lost six million people after Uganda's occupation of parts of Congo. The Court awarded Congo $10 billion in reparations; not a dime has been paid."
At the moment, the Ugandan army, hunting for Kony in the DRC Congo, stands accused by Western human rights groups of raping and looting there. See:
http://www.observer.ug/index.php?option=com_content&view=article&id=17456:updf-in-kony-hunt-accused-of-rape-looting”
By the way, I hardly call the Blackstar News service a reputable source.
I think it is a stretch to call Friends of the Congo "balanced" there are good points in the linked video but be aware of the bias because inherently political.
If everyone worked with only those with clean records in Central Africa there would be no one to work with not the SPLA, RPF, UPDF or FARDC. These institutions must be reformed made accountable, not banished or abandoned. Trying to arrest members of the UPDF and RPF as well as the country's leaders will only perpetuate the conditions in which instability has thrived. Sovereign nations have a responsibility to control their borders and those within it. That is the first order of business here, the DRC is a dumping ground for everyone else's insurgencies and it needs to end.
Stop looking in terms of black and white. It will solve nothing and in the DRC and surrounding nations there is only grey.
I don't mean to be hateful, but this post showcases the kind of self-indulgence that many people found off-putting about the KONY video. I don't think shame is as much of a problem to our culture as narcissism is.
Take Russell's appearance at Liberty U: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wkB8o5VWAjE
I'll highlight the most important quote from Russell as it is long: “We can have fun while we end genocide,its an adventure, there are so many obstacles and challenges, but we’re going to have a blast doing it" He then adds a "woo-woo" at the end after invoking God. Not only does this show a complete lack of understanding of the meaning of the word "genocide" (LRA has never committed genocide), but it shows he is not taking this seriously.
Even if advocates and aid workers don't agree with the opinion of people like Dombiso Moyo, David Reiff, or Alex de Waal it is 100% irresponsible to not understand their arguments and just completely ignore them.