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Campaign Comedy Corner


WHO'S ON FIRST?

Senator McCain is paying close attention to who might be his potential running mates on the Republican ticket. He's trying to select someone for the Vice Presidential slot as a running mate that's a sure winner. After all, McCain is no youngster anymore! And one of the two on the ticket has got to live out the first term, right? And who are all the pundits talking about?

Well, there's Governor Charlie Crist of Florida, a really popular guy. He's handsome, and the experts say McCain sure could use the State of Florida to win. But if McCain does select Charlie Crist as his running mate, some voters will want to ask some tough questions about those McCain-Crist bumper stickers. Like "So, why is Jesus only second on the ticket?"


COME FLY WITH ME!

Some of the political experts say Senator McCain may have 2 strikes against him. When he graduated from Annapolis, there were 899 Midshipmen in his class. Ensign John McCain graduated 894th ---- 5th from the bottom. Next, when he became a Navy jet pilot, you're normally allowed to ditch just one of those multi-million dollar jets in the drink. McCain put, count 'em, 3 of them into the drink. Even by an average accountant's reckoning, and let's assume that the CPA is a Republican, that's up to 100 million tax payer bucks down the drain. But no matter how you slice it, one thing's for sure: if Senator McCain doesn't make it to the White House, he sure won't be flying for American Airlines.

WHO'S ON FIRST? Senator McCain is paying close attention to who might be his potential running mates on the Republican ticket. He's trying to select someone for the Vice Presidential slot as a runni...
WHO'S ON FIRST? Senator McCain is paying close attention to who might be his potential running mates on the Republican ticket. He's trying to select someone for the Vice Presidential slot as a runni...
 
 
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HUFFPOST SUPER USER
Yohomegirl
11:57 AM on 06/15/2008
McCain an average Joe, 'I'm dumb as dirt, I like to fight, I'd rather swim than fly, and I have huge credit card debt'.
01:41 PM on 06/14/2008
Hmmm.... He was a terrible pilot, eh?
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01:07 PM on 06/14/2008
The more we find out about him the more he resembles Bush.
01:00 PM on 06/14/2008
Perhaps you meant the country, not the county?
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pcplz
just a lil ol' lady with a mind.
12:03 PM on 06/14/2008
He got into the Academy on his ancestors and into politics on his second wifes contacts and $$....now he wants to be president on our backs!! Elitist??
09:50 AM on 06/14/2008
Silvio Berluscaoni, the media tycoon and recently returned Prime Minister of Italy, hopes John McCain is elected in November because at international gatherings there will be at least one person older than him, if only by a month or so.
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Yohomegirl
11:55 AM on 06/15/2008
Not a good enough reason, I'll stick with Obama.
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happyblackman
Gotta have more cowbell baby!
09:58 PM on 06/13/2008
I wonder why that fact is not put out among the MSM? I never knew he was marginal; at best, pilot. Also, that he graduated so low in his class!
01:51 AM on 06/14/2008
His father was an admiral, and his grandfather was an admiral.

It's the only reason he was in the Naval Academy. It's the only reason he graduated. It's the only reason he was allowed to crash two planes -- the first two were pilot error I believe.

The only reason he was in his third plane at the time he was shot down was because he's an admiral's kid.

He should have been pushing a pen on a base somewhere. From all reports that I've seen, he was never a good pilot.
01:03 PM on 06/14/2008
The average IQ of this country is going down, while the waistline inches are going up. Senator JMC is a prime example of the first trend, as visible generation to generation changes take place.
08:15 PM on 06/13/2008
If sElected President, he'll put the county in "the drink" too.