Gratitude: Musings after my Incarceration in Zimbabwe

We have a rat in our wall this morning. A rat in our wall is very rare, and I wake up from the sound of his gnawing at something religiously. I wonder if he will ever get to the bottom of whatever he is chewing -- and find nothing left to gnaw! My brain has been in a perpetual state of gnawing since my arrest and deportation from Zimbabwe during the filming of my feature-length documentary, Tapestries of Hope.

This is the first time that I have used my pen to write an original thought since my arrest. I will never take for granted the power of free-thinking or the ability to speak of my experience without fear of repercussions, torture or death. I type these words with a great deal of reverence, responsibility and respect. I borrow from Edward Bulwer-Lytton:

Beneath the rule of men entirely great,
The pen is mightier than the sword. Behold
The arch-enchanters wand! -- itself a nothing!
But taking sorcery from the master-hand
To paralyse the Cæsars, and to strike
The loud earth breathless! -- Take away the sword
States can be saved without it!

After arrest by about 15 secret service agents, three days of interrogation and incarceration interspersed with a night in a windowless 5x5 prison cell, and being escorted to a plane for deportation - I am grateful to be walking again on United States soil. In fact, I kissed the carpet at San Francisco airport when we landed (It needs to be cleaned, guys!)

I recently traveled to Africa to tell the story of the rape and abuse of young girls in Zimbabwe. I had planned to explore the myths behind the cultural belief that when a man rapes a virgin (the younger the better), he will cure his AIDS. Not only is this absurd notion false, but it has spread the deadly virus to younger children rapidly. Betty Makoni, a child rights activist and my friend had formed the Girl Child Network several years back. The focus of GCN is to create awareness, assist these girls and create and empower change. She is a beacon of hope amongst the continued ravaging of young girls and infants in that country.

Even after our incarceration and interrogation, we have managed to bring back enough videotape footage to tell the story. That is another reason that I am grateful. We managed to capture footage of a Zimbabwe doctor who volunteers with the GCN and tells us about the rape of a one-day-old. It is beyond comprehension to know that this is going on in Zimbabwe and other parts of Africa. This infant's case is certainly not isolated. I can't bear to think about how much pain and carnage her body went through from this horrendous act. She died from the trauma.

Since our departure Betty has been interrogated, jailed and forced to report every day to the Harare Police Headquarters to answer repetitive and ignorant questions from an office army of drones.

The questions have been going like this:

"Why are you doing this?

"Why do you only work with girls?" (The rape and abuse of boys in Zimbabwe is much less of a problem than girls -- much less so than the U.S. problem with the rape and abuse of young boys)

"You are using the girls as a cover to form a political party!"

"Your friends from America are Central Intelligence Agency Officers!"

"You have caused a lot of trouble -- it is time for you to be behind bars!"

True, it is time for someone to be behind bars -- but that is not Betty Makoni. She is a gutsy, inspirational leader who fights for change every second of her life. I am humbled by her tenacity and courage in the face of insurmountable odds. In her focus to increase awareness and help victims, she is bombarded by requests for assistance 24 hours a day. As we traveled in rural areas, I saw the text messages come to her cell phone. I witnessed the people coming to her in a fuel-less gas station desperate for help. A sea of faces crying out: "My daughter... a young neighbor... I am... being raped... sexually molested... I need help." She does not say no. Indeed, she is their only hope.

When I spoke with Betty yesterday, she had just come from being incarcerated. This time they arrested her with well known Zimbabwe talk show host Mai Chisamba, for allegedly contravening the Child Protection and Adoption act. Although they released Mai Chisamba, Betty remained in custody yesterday. The allegations were about the talk show hosts broadcasts a few months back that included rape victims telling their stories. The girl's faces were blurred but the argument was that some could be identified by their voices.

I was supposed to meet Mai Chisamba when I was in Zimbabwe. Betty and Mai have been good friends for some time. Our dinner was to take place on Tuesday the 21st of August. It was the first day of our interrogation, however. By the time we were released, we ended up going to the wrong meeting place and missed Mai. When we tracked her down she was already going to bed. I was disappointed but knew that we would make time later in the week to meet with her. Of course that never happened.

Now Mai Chisamba will be used to testify as a state witness against Betty. Apparently, Betty needs to be silenced. Betty was resigned to her friend's predicament and had no negative words for Mai Chisamba. "She is my friend, an old lady and she is scared. They have her on a tight rope." It is Betty's empathy for people and her own survival story that make her so effective and loved by the Zimbabwe people. Why so much recent grief for all her good work? Look to the papers to see who is doing the raping and you will have a better understanding of the insurmountable odds she must face.

On the phone she was exhausted and disheartened. Her voice cracking as she said, "Women and girls should be let to do their work and not to be victimized again. There is nothing, absolutely nothing political in what we do, and yet we are forced to stop because of false allegations."

Betty must report every morning at 8 a.m. to the downtown police station. She was planning on traveling to the United States on Monday, September 3rd, but for now the trip is canceled. She had planned the trip for the Global Fund for Women and to meet up with photojournalist Paola Guinturco for the tour of her book, Women Who Light the Dark.

It is an incredible book about women all over the globe who use their imagination and passion to create change. The first chapter in the book is Betty Makoni's story. It is through Paola that I became aware of Betty's work and eventually met her in San Francisco. Paola herself is a dedicated force for women's issues and a talented photojournalist.

Now forced to stay in Zimbabwe and miss the launch of the book, Betty is frustrated. Before we hang up Betty says to me: "We need the whole of Africa to know that this should not be allowed. Politics should not stand in the way of helping children." I agree. I think the whole world should know that children are not to be used as pawns for regimes and governments' control. The physical and mental health and welfare of children is everyone's concern.

I am about to retire the keyboard for morning. I can hear my kids yelling. The house is a disaster. It seems so trivial compared to what is going on in Zimbabwe. The rat has moved in the wall, closer to where I sit. I kick the wall to get him to stop making noise.

The gnawing stops for a moment, and then continues...

For more information on what we are doing in Africa, please visit the project's blog or the popular Facebook group.

Comments

[1will]

What a sad story. It's a shame this country doesn't get the same world attention that South Africa got during the Aparthied years.

[Michealene]

Watch CNN tomorrow. We hope to get the story out through Anderson Cooper and AC360 and CNN international. Thanks so much!

[thecatwoman]

I too visited Zimbabwe five years ago as part of my work with a child welfare agency. The country's plight continues to worsen and despite the widespread knowledge of Mugabe's inhumane and corrupt policies, no authorities are taking action.

Oldpotsmuggler mentions a possible solution of sending America's youth to Africa, saying that the presence of these educated youth would bring rewards. I was able to stay at Africa University during my stay and found there are many educated youth already there wanting to help their countries of origin. The problem is that the economic/political situations prevent many of them from fully utilizing their knowledge. They struggle through hardships unknown in our country just to be able to survive, let alone to obtain an education.

One good friend I made there would spend money he didn't have to spare on snacks for the children at the local orphanage. Despite his many hours studying and working, he devoted much time to these children. The same is true of many of the university students who provide volunteer support and mentorship to the orphanage. I am amazed at the hope and unselfish love for others that Zimbabweans exhibit despite their adversities. I hope their resolve will be rewarded someday soon.

Thank you for spreading the word about atrocities in Zimbabwe. Hopefully more will listen and be spurred to action.

[Michealene]

We met many women in prison that we in for illegally selling food on the street. They had no choice, as they needed to feed their families. It is a sad downward spiral of poverty and desperation.

[Absintheforall]

Great post, girlfriend! But all the horrors you and your friends point out to us will never be remedied by "dialogue", empathy or other forlorn hopes.
You point to one inescapable conclusion: Our males will have to go in and kill their males in order to make a difference. It has been thus since the dawn of humanity.

Is this the ultimate solution you seek?

[Michealene]

No not at all. I don't wish to exchange one horror for another. I do think dialogue will create more awareness to the atrocities. I only wish I had the answer.

[oldpotsmuggler]

For many, many ethnic groups, the largest concentration of their population is in the Capital of their nation/region, and the second largest is in some city in the United States. In fact, we are such a melting pot that we literally can go to war against no country without creating the situation where we would have "brother fighting brother". With the various peoples of Africa, the situation is no different than for the rest of the planet except that the history of slavery has obscured the ability to make the kinds of ethnic connections that are available to others.

This, I'm assuming, is at least part of the reason why our national connections in Africa just don't rise to the same level that is common elsewhere. And one consequence of this situation is that economic development in Africa is not as great as would otherwise occur.

I think that the presence of a large number of educated black Americans on the African Continent would be a circumstance of such benefit for the planet that it is a result that we should put substantial effort into creating. Can you imagine several hundred thousand of our folks roaming around over there looking for opportunities? Tell me that that wouldn't be a paradigm shifter!

The proposal, then, is for a special student loan program for one of the most "at risk" segments of our own population, young blacks. One attribute of these loans is that there would be a forgiveness provision tied to doing some post graduate adventuring in the lands of their ancestors. Their mere presence there would bring this country enough rewards to justify the program cost. And then there is the fact that we would unleash an incredible talent pool, that is not now being tapped, to solve a set of problems in an economically under developed continent, that are not now being effectively addressed.

[Michealene]

Your proposal is a good one. I fell in love with the two countries that I visited. Even with my incarceration and treatment, I would go back today if I was certain that I could come home. I would even risk jail to see the friends I made and the girls that I worked with. From what you suggest, imagine the students that would go back to their historical beginnings-they might even stay in Africa. A young, intelligent talent pool that would work to tackle issues unique to that continent could bring about significant change.

[Purple Girl]

This is not just a African story, nor just a womens story this is a human story- and problem that must be addressed as such. But real human tragedy is blighted out by the 'gold shiny obeject' from the mass media.
What I find most disconcerting is that even our humanitarian groups are distracted by relatively minor issues. NOW has failed inaccomplishing true equality in our own nation- within a democracy. Equal Rights- still aren't equal for minorities either. Granted we should get our own house in order. but perhaps if all these groups assembled under one umbrella more pressutre can be put on gov'ts and corporations. Grass roots is great but ultimately I'd like to see a lawn.Quit the rhetoric and focus on the goals with logic.

[Michealene]

I like the idea of all the groups assembled under one umbrella. Too many of them duplicate efforts. I too would love to see a "lawn" but I am not convinced it can happen without people standing up and saying enough of this. It's not okay.

[Snakeback]

I mourn for Africa. The problems there seem devastatingly overwhelming. The government of Zimbabwe in particular seems absolutely hopeless. That government just razed millions of its own citizens' homes. Now it is raping its own children and killing its own people by spreading AIDS as rapidly as possible throughout the entire countryside.

The work you women are doing is heroic.

But the governance of many countries in Africa is a history of unimaginable catastrophes, one after another, with no letup.

The suffering in Africa puts a heavy weight on the entire planet.

[Michealene]

I too mourn for Africa. I felt very hopeless as well. Unless there is some outside "interference" to stop the rape and abuse of these kids, it will continue. It's a desperate, desperate cycle of despair.

[drblack]

Mo gave is a truly evil man and I wish death would come to him fast.
Dar Fur is terrible but other places like Zimbabwe have atrocities happening as well.
It shows how quickly and easily a country can be turned from a happy and free place into a place of death,horror and tyranny so easily if the country'y population is either duped by ignorance and manipulation or apathetic about who they allow
into government.

[Michealene]

I agree. Zimbabwe has incredible atrocities happening but people are not as aware outside of the country. The fear in that beautiful country is palpable.

[Jane]

Wow! Hats off to you. This is a very interesting and moving post.

[Michealene]

Thank you so much. I have found that it is very difficult to come back to a sense of "normalcy" here. The experience had a profound affect.