How Sarah Palin Changed My Life

In the weeks since Gov. Sarah Palin pushed through that vice-presidential nominee door crack, I have not found a single issue over which she and I might agree. I am a pro-choice, anti-war, wealth-spreading liberal with some very good friends who happen to have chosen the straight lifestyle. I favor gun control, alternative energy and The Nation over the National Review.

And yet, as I (slack-jawed at times) have watched Sarah Palin perform under the campaign spotlight, I have concluded that Gov. Palin is a profoundly positive influence in my life.

As it happens, Gov. Palin's ascent into our collective consciousness coincided with the publication of my first book, a public affairs title with a progressive bent that I worked on for four years. I began my book tour at the exact moment that Gov. Palin joined the Republican ticket. Unlike Gov. Palin, I am uncomfortable in the spotlight. But as any author will tell you, public speaking in support of one's book is as much a part of the writer's life as solitary days spent tethered to a keyboard.

And so, uncertain and untrained, I took to the podium hoping to spread the word about my book and the call to action it contains. The first outings on my book tour were extremely painful -- for me, and, I suspect, the audience. Cowed by a lack of confidence, I struggled through my initial appearances and cursed myself for choosing this new career path after decades as a newspaper and magazine journalist, safe from the spotlight

Then, as I watched clips of Gov. Palin -- winking, pointing, and smiling from the podium -- it struck me how unabashed she is, how absolutely fearless. She flubbed sentences -- entire interviews, even - and still the woman remained unfazed. I have to admit I watched these clips over and over, searching for what I might learn, hoping to see into the source of such chutzpah.

During the Palin "victory tour" as the governor spoke with interviewer after interviewer, it finally struck me: From the depths of her soul, Gov. Palin knows there is no one better or more qualified to deliver her message about the future of the United States. She believes in her experience as a governor, her political skills and her ability to connect with people, no matter what the pundits say, or how much Saturday Night Live makes fun of her, or even when her ticket goes down in flames. In this way, Gov. Palin is an anomaly among women of my generation, accomplished middle-aged artists and professionals (many of them feminists) who are far too often plagued by self-doubts and fear of criticism -- others and their own -- regardless of their sterling resumes and relentlessly hard work.

What I gleaned from the victory tour tells me Gov. Palin's confidence is deeply rooted in her religious beliefs. While Palin may be looking to God to show her the next crack in the door and the strength to muscle through it, one need not share Palin's religious views to understand the importance of recognizing opportunities and seizing the moment. After four years of hard work on a book that has received some very nice reviews, it's now my moment for seizing. Watching the governor showed me that to be successful, I must be as unabashed as she is -- as fearless and confident and proud about my own writing and the message I bring to my audiences.

And you know what? It's working. When I step to the podium now, I no longer wonder about my right to be there or worry that I'll disappoint. In my own way, I'm channeling the woman from Wasilla's certitude. And for this, I owe Gov. Palin a great big thank you.

Nena Baker is the author of The Body Toxic: How the Hazardous Chemistry of Everyday Things Threatens Our Health and Well-Being (North Point Press/Farrar, Straus and Giroux).

Comments

[Promise]

I think Palin's "self confidence" lies in the fact that she is either too ignorant or too arrogant to recognize her limitations. Probably both. I am not impressed by this version of self-confidence. She doesn't know that she doesn't know and this keeps her from learning and progressing.

[sunnybunny]

You are so right! I disagree with her on just about everything, but I definitely can see where a lot can be learned from her.She is so confident an enthusiastic

[littlelouwho]

The blogger is right - ACCOMPLISHED women of our generation do have a self-doubt mantra. But the word is accomplished. Sarah Palin isn't accomplished. If you knew how she really got elected (by one of those old white guys and his money) you'd know she's NOT accomplished. Just a backstabbing sociopath who is so deluded she has no concept of reality. She's a narcassist thru and thru.

Hers is more psychologically pathological than anything else. That's why you keep looking and trying to figure out and really not able to come up with anything more than you did. Her's is a psychological defect so many people who yearn for power have. She's not competent. She's not bright. She's not special in any way other than being a full blown study in sociopaths.

If you knew her, you'd know right away her interest isn't you. It's using you to get to where she wants. If you knew the real truth behind her family, her marriage, and what got her elected, you would say same story, different dress.

[Checquoline]

He (or she) who knoweth not, and knoweth that he (or she) knoweth not, may learn. Teach him.
He (or she) who knoweth not, and knoweth not that he knoweth not, is a fool, shun him.

[hresz]

Bible Spice is a narcissist who seems to think hubris can substitute for ability and intellect. I am glad the writer found some value in this woman as I've been unsuccessful.

[hortonhearsawho]

Charles Manson inspired condifence in some folks awhile back...no one is thanking him.

[RadicalRepublican]

Confidence does not necessarily relate to ability. Humility is not a synonym for weakness. If you feel awkward, it's ok. It's far better than faking it.

[Vivien]

Sarah Palin had the opposite effect on me. Now when I feel confident, I worry that what people see is way worse than my self-image. I am now stripped of confidence by my fear of looking like SP.

[HelenBach]

I can't tell if it's confidence, great self-esteem or deeply pathological delusional distorted thinking

[justobserve]

Well said! Confidence of one's ability is one thing but SP's is something dangerous! Palin is confident of her ability to lie through her teeth with a wink. Watching her is like watching a blind running across the busy roads with closed eyes and so it is too scary to let her lead our country.

[susanwilliams]

oh my god saw funniest bit on countdown w/ keith olbermann, "The Complete Book of the Collected Wisdom of Sarah Palin: In Her Own Words," it's blank! what a hoot! i don't agree with her either and think this is a great funny gag gift. sarahgiftbook.com rile up your conservative friends.

[Jenni213]

message board here misses the point. So much hatred of Sarah you cant see through your own dimentia that theres a bigger picture and many lessons to be learned from others..

Nena had it right, the point is, regardless of how others see you, one should always have the confidence and spirit to move forward and not just shrink away. This is a virtue.

You "haters" should move forward, Sarah is consuming you.

to Mac38506, please move out of your mothers basement and get a real life, sitting there staring at your collage of Sarah P. cut from magazines and downloads is very unhealthy.

[SaraKay Smullens - Huffpost Blogger]

I so agree with mac38506! First thing tomorrow morning I am buying Nena's book!
However, pride with no semblance of humility is frightening and horrifying. It is also often captivating, even as it sickens. In an extreme state, this way of being is a defined psychiatric illness, megalomania: those who feel they have a pipeline to G-d.

[hortonhearsawho]

pipeline to themselves. they see god there, not far about, not out there.

[jhamm1]

"From the depths of her soul, Gov. Palin knows there is no one better or more qualified to deliver her message about the future of the United States. She believes in her experience as a governor, her political skills and her ability to connect with people, no matter what the pundits say, or how much Saturday Night Live makes fun of her, or even when her ticket goes down in flames. In this way, Gov. Palin is an anomaly among women of my generation, accomplished middle-aged artists and professionals (many of them feminists) who are far too often plagued by self-doubts and fear of criticism -- others and their own -- regardless of their sterling resumes and relentlessly hard work."

Oh brother. (cue eyeroll)

In other words, you find inspiration in someone whose confidence derives from delusions of grandeur stemming from misplaced faith in experience, intelligence, and judgement which they clearly don't possess. Someone who never second-guesses themselves despite indications screaming from all corners about how certifiably stupid they are. Somebody who merely hears what they want to hear in spite of rampant indications that the way they tell it is anything but like the way it actuallly is.

Clearly, someone of your intelligence should have long since deduced the differences between being unfairly self-critical and completely self absorbed, of which Sarah Palin falls unequivocally into the latter category.

PS. What "accomplishments", and "sterling resume" could you possibly be referring to?

[CJWebber]

Clearly you need to read this again.

[artistgirl]

I see exaactly what she is saying. I am also a master at my task, however when someone recently invited me to talk and do a presentation of my work in front of a large group (audience)... I was stuck, fumbled, and was very nervous throughout. A little more confidence may have helped me get through this gruelling experience. I relate to what she learned from SP's audacity of confidence. It does not mean that she agrees with anything the woman spews.

[mac38506]

A justified pride in the results of hard work is always admirable, but an arrogantly stupefying and stupified sense of mission is always contemptible. Sarah is no Nena. Thank God.