What kids really need from you during and after your divorce or separation is your time, your attention, your compassion and your love. Help them to understand that it is you and the other parent who are splitting up with each other, and that neither of you are splitting up with your children.
It's no surprise that more divorces are filed in January, following the holiday season, than in any other month. That's why, as founder of the Child-C...
Unfortunately, divorce is all too common these days. While the statistics vary, most sources say that 40-50% of the people who get married will eventually call it quits. There are many reasons for this, but I want to talk about some of the things that a lot of people don't remember when going through a divorce.
One of the most difficult challenges for families experiencing transitions such as separation and divorce occurs at holiday times, particularly when it is the first event after a family transition.
Along with the high spirits the holiday season, a package of stress often arrives. This is especially true for divorced couples that struggle over how to make plans that optimize the holidays for themselves and, of course, their children -- who want nothing more than normality.
Our relationship was now better in sickness than it had been in health. As we staggered across the finish line of our divorce, we'd learned how to confront adversity together. No longer protecting ourselves from loss, we were finally free to release one another to the future.
Cooking, shopping managing children's expectations and excitement, all take their toll. How can 5 steps make such a difference? It can be even more challenging when families are separating and you are single woman and perhaps a mother too.
Single parents often hear the advice that they should wait at least six months before introducing a potential new partner to their children. I believe it's important, before you invest that much time, energy and emotion in a relationship, to see if your potential new partner and your children accept each other.
As difficult as breaking the news can be, managing your child's behavior during and after a separation or divorce can be extremely challenging.
Divorce is difficult. No matter how common, it is one of the most challenging of life's experiences. It's not just your marital status that changes -- your entire life shifts. When divorce is personal, everything you've read, heard or seen takes on a new angle. Divorce for me was an alien concept, and the realities that came with it were not something I was prepared for. I had to re-identify myself, my role as a person, a woman, and a mother.
We did not ask for our parents to break up. I know that's not entirely fair to you. Because this is your relationship and your life too... but remember, when you signed up to marry my dad, you signed up for us, too.
Our daughter isn't a possession or a puppet. She's not a pawn or weapon. She's a little girl who never asked for divorced parents and she needs to feel equally important and cherished at both homes. She needs to see her parents love each other and work together as a team.
Always feeling like the bad kid growing up, Colin felt everything was his fault. "My father was abusive to my mother. He was always angry. She was always crying. That is all I remember of my childhood.
Some kids take divorce relatively easy and others, not so much. Perhaps if my daughter had had a sibling to absorb and process the change with maybe she would have taken it better. Perhaps if she weren't so smart she would have handled it better. Perhaps if she were older....IF, IF,IF.
Placing children first should be the primary goal of every divorce, but sometimes there is a real lack of guidance for parents who are trying to navigate this challenging experience. As a result, the American Academy of Matrimonial Lawyers has developed a helpful publication.
In the midst of chaos and grief -- divorcing couples often discount the impact their divorce has on their youngest children. In my therapy practice, parents will often send their older children to therapy, but will report that their little ones are "doing just fine."