Before being single, if you were like me, you probably didn't give much thought to how men saw you. It really didn't matter. You had your man and at least in the beginning he adored you just the way you were, whether in sweats or in a little black dress.
When we said our wedding vows or made our commitments to our partners we never imagined that one day we'd be facing separation and divorce. We never imagined having to date again. That was my experience anyway. Yet, after the ending of a 20-year marriage, I picked up the pieces again.
The type of mate you're looking for in your 30s is probably different than your ideal partner in your 20s. While these exact details will vary from person to person, generally, older daters will have a clearer picture of their ideal mate while younger daters have a more ambiguous picture.
No matter what the two of you do, if other people aren't involved, you are bored out of your skull and staring at the same Instagram feed you looked at two minutes before.
I saw the new movie 'Cinderella' with my granddaughter recently. As Ella and Prince Charming fell in love, I thought about all of the women who wonder why they don't have Prince Charming coming to find them. It's simple. Most women aren't treating men like princes.
A friend and I were talking this morning. He'd set up a date a couple weeks back and I was curious about where they were going but he told me, "It's going to be tomorrow night instead. She texted me a reschedule."
Love is hard to find. And intimacy, often a subconscious feeling of closeness, is scary.
Begin by making your own happiness a priority. What does this have to do with dating? When you're happy, you glow. When you glow, men are attracted to you.
These are three simple things. So simple in fact that we forget to do them. We did these things effortlessly in the beginning, when we were pursuing a romantic relationship. Like I said, this will work in any relationship but let's stick with the romantic side of things first.
Before you can start building a healthy, long-term relationship, you must first understand that there is no such thing as one big commitment that suddenly enters you into that partnership.
There was no salvaging this one. I like "dirty" guys, but an actual aversion to bathing is not OK. As soon as he left, I hopped in the shower to wash off the stench.
I ended the date not long after that. I went home angry. I was not just angry with him for being pushy and not respecting my feelings about it (which is an indication of a controlling personality), but I was angry with myself for buckling.
Having such strong feelings about another person shook me to my core. It made me re-evaluate my beliefs. I learned what it was like to really care about someone. Everything I had believed, everything I stood for, suddenly disappeared. I found a whole new world opened up for me.
The person you fall in love with should enhance your life. He or she is supposed to make you smile more than you frown. They ought to make you feel great about yourself. They should fascinate you, amaze you and of course, make you very, very happy.
Here's an ironic thing about love: People who are frantically searching for it do not usually have much success at finding it. Likewise, people who are awesomely single often do not stay that way for long (unless they choose to!).
Hand gestures, body language, and different words and phrases can carry hidden meanings, which could mean that your date is totally into you or that they're bored to death.