Overriding my vocalizations, my personal AutoCorrect serves as a cyber-Ouija-board, spelling out that which I am trying to ignore, forcing me into a direct confrontation with reality.
Thanksgiving is an amazing holiday with amazing food and a chance to make amazing memories with our amazing families... in theory.
Who's ready for some funny Thanksgiving stories? Thought you might be.
What's with all the gloomy people walking around mumbling and complaining? Don't they know that laughter is the best medicine? Boisterous laughter is the grand cure that causes your face to contort as you make guttural noises and your eyes water, your gut tumbles, and your mood improves.
All of your friends are asleep. You like your medicine. I'm not going to tell you again. Mommy and Daddy think vegetables are delicious.
How bad can this be? I thought. I've had some pretty painful moments in life and I survived. This is gonna be fine, she's just exaggerating. I quickly learned she wasn't.
Armed with the skills and confidence, I found nursing more natural (and fun) the second time around. Did I ever get to rockstar "second freezer" status? No. But I sure worked hard at it. Do I regret anything? No way. Each baby was different, each experience beautiful.
President Obama is about to go to Myanmar for the second time in two years - #BIGDEAL alert! - but, after a recent visit to Myanmar's brand spanking new capital, Nay Pyi Taw, I was wondering: Will anyone actually be there to greet him when he gets there?
My dog JJ was obsessed with trying to find the crying doggy in the video. He tried to make the pup feel better by licking my keyboard. Sweet JJ, and sweet video doggy. I hope for her sake and the pup's, this mom never has to go back to Afghanistan again.
I don't have a problem. I can quit if I want to. These shoes are like friends. And who the hell asked you?
I never imagined Meryl Streep would help me with my parenting skills. Makeup and acting tips, maybe. But her lesson is being practiced in my house now.
We are proposing a new meme idea this year for those of us with less than perfect attitudes. We'll call it #29DaysOfComplaining (Even we can manage being thankful on Thanksgiving). It will take the pressure off those of us who find it difficult to craft 30 idyllic FB statuses.
Tom Slaughter passed away on October 25th. He was a gifted artist, whose work was immediate, fun, simple, and unmistakably his own. Tom lived his life "in the brilliant light of imagined skies, where the time is always high noon or midnight."
Cartoonist Jim Davis is the man behind lasagne-loving, Monday-hating Garfield the cat, who lives with his long-suffering owner, Jon, and fellow pet and perennial crossword puzzle clue, Odie the dog.
As the years have gone by, I have noticed something, as I'm sure you have as well -- scary costumes have been replaced.
I'm pretty sure ever since I came out of the womb I've wanted a puppy. My first words were even "pup pup"! OK fine, maybe it was "papa" but they sound really fucking similar.