Our community is still struggling with how to communicate about HIV and how to treat those who are HIV positive. This is especially evident in the way we are accustomed to asking guys to disclose HIV status online, which has remained largely unchanged since the advent of profile-based websites over 20 years ago.
You are going to be rejected. It is true, and it is going to happen eventually. Someone is going to shut you down before they get to know you because you are living with HIV. It sucks, it isn't fair, and there is nothing that you can do about how they feel. But you can stop equating rejection with loss.
Eight years, eight cities: Buenos Aires, Melbourne, Bangkok, Berlin, Rome, Tel Aviv, Cape Town and Sydney. And what do I have to show for all that time spent living outside the U.S.? Here are some highlights: at least twice as much romantic drama (and comedy) in half the time I spent in New York City, at least two books, and at least five valuable lessons in love and lust.
I fell in love with a boy who had to sneak out of his house to see me. I say "boy" not because we were teenagers breaking curfew. Shane and I were grown men, consenting adults who had been seeing each other for several months. We had everything: chemistry, passion, heat. But only when we got behind closed doors.
Typically when you see somebody with a trifecta of blessings -- youth, wealth and fame -- you're going to see them out from under a lot of bodies. But that is not the case with many gay celebrities. It's not just that they've settled down; it's that they've settled down with somebody from another generation. Why?
When I was 24 my idea of "dating older" was dating somebody who was 26. I was so age-phobic I didn't even have friends who were more than ten years older than I was. Now that I'm of a certain age, I'm friends with a lot of 20-somethings and have a bit of a reputation for dating younger. Time has a way with irony.