Watching professional football these days reminds me of Lily Tomlin's Ernestine the telephone operator on Saturday Night Live and her famous punch line, "We don't care. We don't have to. We're the phone company."
Listen, Mr. Goodell, I understand that you work for the owners and that the NFL is a business to you, but for the fans, it's much more than that.
In the worst officiating debacle since the 1972 Munich Olympic Games -- when incompetent game and table officials literally robbed the United States men's Olympic basketball team of a gold medal -- the National Football League became the laughingstock of professional sports Monday Night.
Just how big is the fraud the NFL has been trying to sell the American public? So big that even its loyal business partner ESPN (and other media establishments) can no longer sit idly by without feeling compelled to point out the obvious.
Trust me, I love football more than I love waking up the days a game isn't on, but right now it's not football were watching. It's some three-team sport where you have to hope an athlete makes a play and then an old chemistry teacher doesn't screw it up.
"Protect the shield." -- That's what the NFL and its stone-faced commissioner Roger Goodell tell its players. After Monday night's debacle between Green Bay and Seattle, the NFL should be embarrassed by the product it put on the field.
This might be a first. A New Jersey high school football game was canceled because they feared for the underdogs.
It hurt to watch my Green Bay Packers lose a must-win football game due to the shoddy work of replacement officials who have absolutely no business walking the NFL's sidelines. But what hurts even more is that Packers fans got exactly what they voted for.
This was truly the NFL's Night of Shame, and it had better be the last. Last night's misadventure in Seattle is bigger than one football game. It's about the stunning arrogance of Roger Goodell and the NFL in thinking fans will not care if the game they love is officiated in a remotely professional and fair manner.
The Seattle Seahawks have a deadly home field advantage that causes earthquakes.
With so many of the game's most critical plays now reviewed automatically, it's actually time to eliminate the coaches' challenge from the game outright.
Each time I introduced Ernie, the crowd erupted viscerally. This wasn't cavalier Hollywood fandom. With Ernie, the connection was much more substantial, much more emotional. Ernest Borgnine mattered to their lives, and they wanted to show him.
The most corrupted special interests of the nation are pouring money into Wisconsin to support Scott Walker, but if the people who care about the country care enough to vote, the good people can still triumph over the dirty money in Wisconsin.
It should come as no surprise that here, in the restaurant, two separate people have come up and told him to run -- for what, it's not really important. Governor. Senator, again. Hell, President. Problem is Citizen Feingold is starting to enjoy himself.
Were Manning to be terminated -- his contract, not him -- the Colts would save $63.6 million over the next four years. The salary cap consequences to a Manning release are a bit more complicated.
As football season comes to a close, it would not be a bad idea for certain teams to think about "painting their dreams." If we think about it, football is like a work of art.