Guns and grief are a bad combination. Our judgment is clouded and undone in moments of aggrieved passion; we are least suited at such times to take on the roles of both jury and judge, leaving aside the illegality of such vigilantism. We may, in the throes of passion, misconstrue causes and misdirect blame. But we may hope to live through such moments, and see in a calmer, clarifying light.
That's not to say we aren't responsible for our choices as adults. We are. Responsible for telling the truth and getting the support we need. We are responsible for our feelings and taking action on our own behalf. Responsible for making amends. Responsible for learning to nurture our own hearts when we've never felt nurtured.