Draw a hard line between the good choices and bad; there's no point mulling over things that just aren't good for you. Of course, you should always trust your gut. Your gut feeling is based on all of those previous experiences and intuitive feelings you may not understand or even remember, but it won't lead you astray.
As moms, we all struggle in different ways. Whether it's with post-partum depression, balancing motherhood with work, separation anxiety, sleeping, etc. we are all coming to the table with something that we could all use some help with. Instead of lashing out labeling someone as less than a great mother, perhaps kindness is a better option.