Different partners draw out of us different emotions -- some we didn't even know we had -- and sustaining a relationship becomes tedious from both ends. But we must ensure that at least we're doing our part. So how do we navigate it through it all and improve the quality of our love?
You seemed more like a Virgo online. Want to come to my karate class?
Sure, we're all busy getting our s**t together and finding what works for us, but let me just say this: What happened to the damn magic?
Though we all learned pretty quickly that an orgasm a day was a tad too ambitious, we've all seen significant increases compared to last year and have been enjoying ourselves immensely. So while my 2015 "summer of masturbation" never materialized, I do have some early takeaways from my 2016 "year of orgasms."
Sexual fetishes are frequently misunderstood and stigmatized because they're so specific and can be so intense, but as long as the experience is positive and both the fetishist and partner feel good about the fetish and experience, it's healthy.
The way most of us have been taught to go about intimacy is actually causing a lot of struggle in our relationships. And it may be holding us back from the deeper, life-long intimacy that many of us crave.
In this day and age we live our lives online. And of course this naturally extends to our romantic lives whether that be dating, married or in a committed relationship. This has happened so quickly that we haven't necessarily taken the precautions to protect ourselves. And because we live our lives online, it is only natural that our romantic encounters, relationships and prospects also have an online existence.
At first alcohol seemed to please me and in turn whomever my partner for the moment was going to be. I was uninhibited, I was eager to do what they requested and be ravished myself.
The Takeaway: Meeting one new awesome human is worth all of that crappy paperwork.
If we want to learn how to talk about sex, we need to start talking about sex comfortably at younger ages. We, as a country, need to offer more comprehensive sex education to children so they learn how to talk about sex in more effective ways.
On a recent Saturday morning, at a farmer's market in a hip L.A. neighborhood, I watched a woman swagger past the children's drum circle holding a leash, not with a dog, but a man attached. He wore a pink dog collar and his eyes were downcast as curious onlookers whispered and smiled.
The temptation to transfer will be real. Trust me. You want to see them every day -- especially if you come from an experience like I had. But in the end, it's better if the two of you learn how to be financially and socially independent in college.
So many of us who have been traumatized as children, who were unloved or not loved enough, who were rejected, abandoned, abused, develop addictions ...
Many of us simply don't make pleasure a priority in our lives. We put everything else before our own pleasure and then we are simply too tired for pleasure. Or we run out of money or time. Remember, pleasure doesn't have to involve a partner.
He used to look at me from across a crowded bar or party with eyes that subtly hinted, "Let's get out of here." Now, he looks at me from across the house with eyes that basically scream, "You could use a shower, a glass of wine, or maybe something stronger."
I want to share these science-based tips with you to help you avoid those silly mistakes and help your relationships flourish!