A white woman's emotional reactions, regardless of how outlandish or inappropriate, are perceived differently than those of black women. When white women express their emotional state, it is perceived as a "bad hair day" or perhaps, a hormonal imbalance. When a black woman does the same, her behavior becomes who she is in the sight of others.
The reasons for the myth's persistence continue to fascinate me. Partly it's because people are such poor statisticians. We remember the two or three cases of people we know who prove the myth to be true and disregard the dozens, if not hundreds, of others in our acquaintance who continue steadfastly through the middle decades of life. There's also a fascination and allure to the midlife crisis.
The day our selfies accurately reflect our inner lives is the day we become an integrated species. This is the day the Shadow recedes and the Self of higher awareness shows up. It's a day worth waiting for. The struggle is right before us, projected on our computers, phones, TV screens and in new genres of literature dedicated to the paranormal underbelly.
If we just embraced the fact that many things we want in our lives and our careers really take a lot of hard work, we'd enjoy the process so much more. Stop resisting the hard work and embrace it. Chances are that your friend who has it "easier" is working her toosh off and would tell you so if you asked.