Many of us are trying to "improve" our children because we don't realize that this comes from judgement and our own feeling of "not good enough."
Being a mother today is no harder or easier than it ever was. It's always been a really tough job. But what my mother and my wife have in common seem to be things that have allowed them to succeed in different ways.
When we really drill down into what sharing is and what it isn't and what it means to share, we might find ourselves misaligned, misinformed or simply mistaken. So here are seven thoughts to provoke your stance on sharing and whether or not sharing truly equals caring.
The week leading up to Mother's Day is always painful for a woman who wants nothing more than to know the joy that she sees many of the friends in her peer group sharing on their Facebook news feeds.
It was under the tree house where my siblings and I would play restaurant, serving up birdseed soup and mud pies. It was in the big red barn that we would play hide-and-seek. It was on the tire swing where we would shout out made-up songs. It was on the screened-in porch where I spent hours filling notebooks with story ideas. We drank from the outdoor water pump after spending a day playing mermaids and Marco Polo in the swimming pool. We would make bouquets out of my mom's flowers and ride bikes up and down the big hill, stopping by the apple trees for a snack.
Love changes with time, with partners, with children, with age -- sometimes in the blink of an eye. This girl did love that boy to the degree she knew of love and for her mother to dismiss it so casually was to dismiss her daughter's feelings casually.
Tolerance and understanding are not just about what politically correct declarations we make at cocktail parties or as our social media personas. It is not just wearing a ribbon or a certain color on a certain day. It is about LIVING every day with kindness and acceptance in your heart and teaching your children to do the same.
Before I emerge from my idyllic cocoon, I'll prepare myself for the homemade cards, pretty flowers and sloppy kisses that will greet my arrival. I truly love those gifts from my precious daughters and the love in their eyes as they shower me with their presents is the best feeling ever. But.
How do we eliminate the bias against black skin which seems to be so inextricably linked to issues of discrimination that have a real impact on the progress of African-Americans? Economic investment, legal reform and improvements in education are certainly needed. But, I also believe that positive multicultural media is part of the solution.
"I'm tired of a being a wife," my friend Leanne said over our first glass of Pinot Grigio as the band started to play. "I'm tired of being a mother. I need a break!" I knew exactly what she meant.
During my senior year in high school, just about when the pressure of life and the ambivalence of graduation overwhelmed me, my dear drama teacher summoned me to his office from gym class.
During my childhood I was aware that I was different in color from the majority of people around me, but my father and mother emphasized brainpower, not color. Color was what you were, but not using your brain was a choice.
We chronically ill folks have years of experience dealing with unknowingly rude comments. But something changes when you become a parent.
Understandably, parents and students are elated upon finishing college or graduate school. Getting a degree is something to be proud of, however, academic success does not always lead to fiscal maturity.
During the thirteen years I ran Kids' Turn, preceded by my years as a public school administrator, it became apparent to me parent education programs were the key to changing patterns in families. Stated simply, people are not born knowing how to be parents.
When my son accepted the job that will take him away from us, it was different from all of his other departures. Before, I knew he'd be back. There were college breaks and summers. There was the job that took him just a half hour away. But this time, everything is different. He's leaving, and I don't think he's coming back.