Honestly, Islamic and national holidays have become more important for me when I became a mother. In our multicultural community in the U.S., my children enjoy many other holidays. I thought, "Why shouldn't I make something special for them for our own holidays?"
Attending a government iftar is not tantamount to endorsing the government itself. One can support America without supporting the American government, and indeed a hallmark of being an American is having the freedom to agree or disagree with policies as one likes.
We are so worried about nourishing our stomachs, and by extension, worried about ourselves, sometimes we forget those around us, those without enough to eat, those who are ill but have much more patience than you and me.
Sometimes people explain fasting as designed to sensitize believers to the plight of the poor. This is undoubtedly one of the things that Ramadan brings. But there is something else vital: the discipline of obedience to a divine directive.