Singled Out

Reports of Singles' Early Demise are Greatly Exaggerated (or Just Plain Wrong)

Bella DePaulo | Posted 10.19.2011

Read More: Marriage, Singled Out, Myths About Singles, Singlism, Longevity, Relationships, Matrimania, Mortality, Flawed Research, Emotional Intelligence, Healthy Living News

A just-published article claims that people who stay single are headed straight to the grave -- and fast. Faster than people who are currently married.

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Taking on Singlism: 28 Writers Help Me Display and Slay the Beast

Bella DePaulo | Posted 07.19.2011

"DePaulo says that 'singlism' -- a term she coined and for which we are prepared to forgive her -- is not just aimed at unmarried women." -Gail Collin...

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Is Marriage that Luxury Cruise Ship Stranded in the Ocean?

Bella DePaulo | Posted 11.17.2011

Read More: Singled Out, Friends, Economics, Marriage, Matrimania, Kids of Single Parents, Scholars of Single Life, Single Life, Marriage Education, Singles, Media, Time Magazine, Single at Heart, Pew Report, Marriage Obsolete, Marketplace, Meaningful Lives, Singlism, Cohabitation, Fragile Spouse, Laws, Resilient Single Person, Discrimination, Intensive Coupling, Couples, Family, Healthy Living News

Time magazine calls marriage a 'luxury yacht.' Remember what happened on the last cruise ship? The cover of Time magazine asks, in big bold letters,...

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Single Parent? No, Your Kids Are Not Doomed!

Bella DePaulo | Posted 05.25.2011

Read More: Singled Out, Children of Single Parents, Unmarried Parents, Divorce, Relationships, Women Without Children, Pew Survey, Adolescents, Cohabiting Couples, Media, Interracial Marriage, Prejudice, Time Magazine, Drug and Alcohol Abuse, Neglect, Scientific Research, Married Parents, Attachment, Expectations, Singlism, Conflict, Single Parents, New Family Forms, Warmth, GLBT Parents, Discrimination, Risk, Divorce News

Most headlines from the recent Pew and Time survey were some variation on "4 in 10 say marriage is becoming obsolete." The full report was titled "The...

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Does the Prop 8 Ruling Make the Case for Ending Marital Privilege?

Bella DePaulo | Posted 05.25.2011

Read More: Social Security, Glbt, Singled Out, Prop 8 Ruling, Proposition 8, Judge Vaughn Walker, 1138 Federal Statutes, Marriage, Singlism, Couples, Singlehood, Marital Privilege, Same-Sex Couples, Health Insurance, Living Single, Single With Attitude, Politics News

My question is this: Why should coupled people, but not single people, have greater access to health insurance, employment benefits, or anything else simply because they are coupled?

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In 4,000 Word Story on Marriage Education, Washington Post Only Quotes True Believers

Bella DePaulo | Posted 05.25.2011

Read More: Wade Horn, Singled Out, Unmarried Parents, Abuse, Relationships, Divorce, Federally Funded Programs, Marriage, Relationship Quality, Marriage Education, Communication Skills, Bachelors, Media, Singles, Intimate Violence, Smartmarriages, Myths, Mothers, Separation, Settling, Biased Reporting, Conflict, Marriage Promotion, Washington Post, Parenting Skills, Parents, Single With Attitude, Relationship Workshops, Media News

Have you read The Marriage Myth story in the Washington Post? The subtitle of reporter Ellen McCarthy's article is "Why do so many couples divorce? Ma...

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Is Marriage Good for Your Health, NY Times Asks

Bella DePaulo | Posted 11.17.2011

Coming this Sunday to the New York Times Magazine (already available online here) is an article by Tara Parker-Pope titled, "Is marriage good for your...

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The Truth about Taxes: Uncoupled Singles Always Pay a Penalty

Bella DePaulo | Posted 05.25.2011

Read More: Singled Out, Marriage Penalty, Household Expenses, Law Review, Unmarried Couples Penalty, Marital Status, Housework, Income, Marriage, Singlism, Economies of Scale, Work, Pay Inequities, Parental Status, Discrimination, Taxation, Singles Penalty, Marriage Bonus, Politics News

Of course, that's not what we hear in the public conversation. But it's official: It's not a marriage penalty, it's a singles penalty.

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Is Marriage a Barbarian-Adoption Program?

Bella DePaulo | Posted 11.17.2011

Married men are less generous with their friends after marrying. How, does this qualify as acting "more civilized," as the Marriage Mafia claim?

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If This Were Your Life, Would You Consider It "Relatively Narrow"?

Bella DePaulo | Posted 05.25.2011

You may want to skim this list before reading the Washington Post's summary of its story: "Kagan has many achievements, but her world has been relatively narrow."

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Sandra Bullock, David Brooks, and Misleading Claims About Marrying

Bella DePaulo | Posted 11.17.2011

In his column today, David Brooks writes that, "According to [one study], being married produces a psychic gain equivalent to more than $100,000 a year." What exactly does this mean?

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Now We're Supposed to Fret that She's Not a Mother?

Bella DePaulo | Posted 05.25.2011

Read More: Supreme Court, Glbt, Singled Out, Work Life Balance, Sandra Day O?Connor, Motherhood Penalty, Childless, Ruth Bader Ginsburg, Single Mothers, Elena Kagan, David Souter, Living Single, Shriver Report, Pay Inequity, Media, Singles, Juggling, Myths, Family and Medical Leave Act, Dahlia Lithwick, Intimacy, Singlism, Stereotypes, Workplace, Hanna Rosin, Samuel Alito, Discrimination, Washington Post, Married Mothers, Single With Attitude, Politics News

Are you persuaded that Supreme Court nominee Elena Kagan is not gay, and that it should never have mattered anyway? Good, because now we can move on to her next supposed shortcoming.

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Harvard Press Was Right to Reject "The Case for Marriage"

Bella DePaulo | Posted 05.25.2011

Read More: Msnbc, Singled Out, Divorce, Economy, Marriage Movement, Harvard University Press, Fat, Marital Status, Stanley Kurtz, The Case for Marriage, Media, Maggie Gallagher, Wall Street Journal, Happiness, Scientific Research, Marriage Promotion, Single Parents, Heart Health, Widowed, Linda Waite, Finances, Liberal Media, Depression, Children of Single Parents, Longevity, Selective Reporting, Marriage, Living Single, Cohabiting, Psychology Today, Time Magazine, Obesity, Myths, Drug Study, Stereotypes, Doubleday, Hazardous to Health, Health, Sex, Methodology, Single With Attitude, Books News

I have news for Stanley Kurtz: The Case for Marriage was second rate and not worth publishing.

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Should You Marry that Rude, Stinky, Creepy Person Since You're Not Perfect Either?

Bella DePaulo | Posted 11.17.2011

Read More: Singled Out, Psychology Today, Backlash, Matrimania, Single Life, Media, Atlantic Magazine, Friendship, Marriage, Therapist, Caricatures, Singlism, Single Women, Couples, Marry Him, Issues, Condescension, Prejudices, Relationships, Books, Lonely, Singles, Myths, Feminism, Settling, Cnn, Clients in Therapy, Stereotypes, Jon Stewart, Living Single, Alone, Lori Gottlieb, Healthy Living News

Once upon a time, a reporter for a major magazine declared, in all seriousness, that women should just get married already - even if it means settling...

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Do Relationships Need Lies to Survive?

Bella DePaulo | Posted 11.17.2011

Read More: Reassurance, Singled Out, Little Lies, Hurt Feelings, Lies, Relationships, Best Friends, Writing, Singles, Serious Lies, Compassion, Death, Loyalty, Deception, Media News, Love, Betrayal, Blogging, Healthy Living News

I draw a big line between little lies and big ones. Serious lies -- the big time betrayals of trust -- are probably never good for relationships of any kind. Little lies are often a different matter entirely.

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Two Scholars Ask: What if Marriage Is Bad for Us?

Bella DePaulo | Posted 11.17.2011

Read More: Social Security, Singled Out, Divorce, Civil Rights, Sociology, Middle Class, Matrimania, Pop Culture, Race, Cultures, Laura Kipnis, Happiness, Friendship, Isolation, Institutions, Politics, Mate Choice, Singlism, Wealth, Retirement Benefits, Love, Health Care, Status Quo, Family, Advocacy, Benefits, Marriage, Lifelong Singles, Domestic Gulag, Myths, Hollywood, Loneliness, Work, Health, Single, Health Insurance, Blaming the Victim, Single With Attitude, Healthy Living News

Marriage is not for everyone, and people who want to stay single should not be targeted with singlism because of it.

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Shriver Report: Get Married, Have Kids, Then We'll Speak to Your Issues

Bella DePaulo | Posted 11.17.2011

Read More: Workforce, Social Security, Singled Out, Pay, Divorce, Children, Matrimania, A Woman?S Nation, Gloria Steinem, Nonfamily Households, Media, Childless Women, Business, Ideology, Consciousness-Raising, Friendship, Compulsory Heterosexuality, Politics, Compulsory Mothering, Singlism, Discrimination, Breadwinners, Health Care, Couples, Family, Women?S Media Center, Taxes, Connection, Single-Person Households, Wives, Compulsory Marriage, Money, Women?S Movement, Suze Orman, Shriver Report, Singles, Maria Shriver, Time Magazine, Mothers, Gender, Education, Oprah Winfrey, Career, Workplace, Unmarried America, John Podesta, Adrienne Rich, Healthy Living News

I'll highlight some remarkable and conventional-wisdom-defying findings from the report that were published but never headlined.

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Marriage and Health: Et Tu, New York Times?

Bella DePaulo | Posted 11.17.2011

Read More: Depression, Singled Out, Divorce, Matrimania, Marriage Movement, Media, Obesity, Policy, Myths, Marriage, Singlism, Methodological Problems, Health, Single, Health Insurance, New York Times, Discrimination, Finances, Healthy Living News

I am disappointed with the recent Times article that claims that married people tend to be healthier than single people. Here's why the piece is misleading.

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Newsweek's Misleading Account of Latest Marriage Study

Bella DePaulo | Posted 11.17.2011

Read More: Mark Sanford, Depression, Singled Out, Divorce, Marriage, Jon and Kate, Marriage Movement, Widow, Media, Policy, Myths, Age of Marriage, Journalism, Singlism, Methodological Problems, Health, Single, Chronic Illness, Remarriage, Newsweek, Healthy Living News

A new day has dawned, and with it another study of marriage misrepresented in the media: as always, implying that getting married results in better outcomes than it actually does.

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Marital Mentality #2: The More Profound Historic Change

Bella DePaulo | Posted 11.17.2011

Read More: Singled Out, Friends, Relationships, Marriage, Solo Living, Personal Communities, Singles, Myths, Sociability, Same-Sex Marriage, Meaning of Life, Solitude, Single Parents, Passions, Siblings, Legal Protections, Family, Healthy Living News

Why should you have to be any kind of a couple to have access to basic rights, protections, dignity, and respect?

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Marital Mentalities: The Changes are Historic, and We're Living Them

Bella DePaulo | Posted 11.17.2011

Read More: The Week, Scientific Claims, Depression, Singled Out, Worldviews, Divorce, Children, Atlantic, Single Parenting, Marriage, Matrimania, Media, Time, Singlism, No Children, Historic Change, Mythology, Single, Demographics, Healthy Living News

There's a lot of matrimania going on but I suspect that's not a sign of how secure we are about the place of marriage in our lives, but how insecure.

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"Avoid Marriage," Advises Atlantic Writer

Bella DePaulo | Posted 11.17.2011

Read More: Singled Out, Nation Magazine, Friends, Longevity, Children, Single Mothers, Matrimania, Divorce, Singles, Media, Myths, Atlantic Magazine, Barack Obama, Rachel Maddow Show, Happiness, Marriage, Singlism, Health, Families, Love, Fathers, Healthy Living News

Who is happier and psychologically stronger - people who got married and then got unmarried, or people who stayed single? The answer, in just about every study I've ever reviewed, is people who have stayed single.

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For the Love of Blogging

Bella DePaulo | Posted 05.25.2011

When I first started blogging, I never imagined it would become one of my favorite things to do.

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More about Sonia Sotomayor, From Someone Who Knew Her at Yale

Bella DePaulo | Posted 05.25.2011

Read More: Latinos, Supreme Court, Citizen Lawyers, Singled Out, Friendships, Singlism, Yale Law School, Sonia Sotomayor, Single, David Souter, Living Single, Media, Race, Barack Obama, Souter, Politics News

Rachel Moran: "The stigma of singledom seems to have disappeared when it comes to qualifying for high office, both for men like David Souter and women like Sonia Sotomayor."

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USA Today Reporter Responds to Blog Post

Bella DePaulo | Posted 05.25.2011

Read More: Marriage-Promotion, Singled Out, Divorce, Children, Matrimania, Singles, Media, Government Programs, Myths, Happiness, Blogs, Marriage, USA Today, Singlism, Wealth, Advertising, Single Parents, Health, Discrimination, Methodology, Media News

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