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The RHOC Stepmom Wars

Mary T. Kelly, M.A. | Posted 11.09.2015 | Divorce
Mary T. Kelly, M.A.

Simply stated, stepmothers aren't the most understood. The "evil" stepmother myth is alive and well.

The Wonderful Daughter I Never Had

Valerie Albarda | Posted 09.17.2015 | Women
Valerie Albarda

At 52 years old, I'm a daughter, wife, stepmother, sister, aunt and friend. I am all of these things and I am grateful. However, the one thing I am not is a mother. Years ago, I made the decision not to have children. What I failed to do, however, was listen to the voice of my future self.

Dear Stepmother: You Are Not a Mom

Kelly Chaplin | Posted 09.11.2015 | Divorce
Kelly Chaplin

Mom is a title that women hold closely, and I understand that. Mom is your title and yours alone. I didn't plan on being a stepmom, nor did I pick the title. It is not something that I worked for, yet it is something that I am working on. I'm here to love and care for my stepdaughter as best I can and put her needs and wants first. Being a stepmom is a separate relationship from being mom, and one does not threaten or replace the other.

'I Am A Wicked Stepmother'

Kelly Chaplin | Posted 08.31.2015 | Divorce
Kelly Chaplin

Evil, withholding love, despising children and being equally despised by all. Stepmothers in fairy tales are never depicted nicely. I joined this infamous and complicated club ten years ago.

5 Ways To Be The Best Dad Ever After Divorce

Joel Schwartzberg | Posted 06.02.2015 | Divorce
Joel Schwartzberg

Many divorced and remarried dads have deep insecurities about their new parenting roles, as if a dad's relevance is directly proportionate to the minutes and hours he spends with his children. But all dads are dads 100% of the time, just as all moms are still moms 100% of the time.

I Made An Unexpected Friend During Divorce -- My Ex's New Wife

Lisa Lavia Ryan | Posted 05.25.2015 | Divorce
Lisa Lavia Ryan

In the trenches of my worst behavior and my most grievous failures as a human being, I made a friend. She was, and is, my ex-husband's wife.

Hey, Who's In My House -- Step Kids Struggle, Too

Erin Mantz | Posted 05.11.2015 | Divorce
Erin Mantz

I read a lot about stepmother struggles -- about how they wish they were treated, want to be treated, think they should be treated -- by their stepkids. And I get it. I've had one, practically am one and know a lot. Most stepmothers deserve respect, kindness, acknowledgement and even some appreciation. It's not easy being a stepmom. But, it's not easy being a step kid, either.

Happy Stepmother's Day!

Meia Chita-Tegmark | Posted 05.10.2015 | Divorce
Meia Chita-Tegmark

I feel that the celebration of stepmotherhood in our cultures should start with us the stepmoms. I also think that it is great to celebrate on Mother's Day -- not because we are trying to steal the day away from the biological mothers, but because of the connection we have to those that share their children with us.

The Greatest Mother's Day Card Ever Written

Barbara Goldberg | Posted 05.07.2015 | Divorce
Barbara Goldberg

Dear Me, Happy Mother's Day! I am so proud of you. Another year has gone by and you have done your best. You have passionately loved your family and worked hard to give them what they need and want. You have tried. I love that about you.

5 Boldfaced Lies About Being A Stepmom

Brenda Ockun | Posted 05.26.2015 | Divorce
Brenda Ockun

Relationships take time, so don't let anyone define your family's natural progression. Practice kindness and mutual respect. If love develops? Great! Consider it a bonus.

My Stepmother Plan Was harder to Write Than my Business Plan

Kathryn Minchew | Posted 05.13.2015 | Divorce
Kathryn Minchew

It was clear to me I needed some kind of plan but here was a situation where one of the largest stakeholders in my business (aka my new family) was someone I had never interviewed, let alone approved.

Check Your Ego at the Door (Beyond Mom and Stepmom Hate)

Shelley Wetton | Posted 04.26.2015 | Divorce
Shelley Wetton

My little boy's well being stopped my insecurity in its tracks. I didn't want Connor to suffer and refused to confuse him by encouraging hatred for a woman who loved him. I refused to be selfish, cruel and bitter because it's just not how I'm wired.

The Moment I Bonded With My Stepdaughter For Good

Heather Leiva | Posted 04.07.2015 | Divorce
Heather Leiva

A biological parent can suggest it's dangerous to walk on those rocks, and be met with momentary disdain followed by snuggles five minutes later.

All I Can Ever Promise To Be As A Mother And Stepmother

Nicole Jankowski | Posted 03.24.2015 | Divorce
Nicole Jankowski

While I would never claim to be GOOD at the job of being a mother, I can claim, with assuredness, that I am, at least, experienced.

An Open Letter To My Daughter's Stepmom

Candice Curry | Posted 02.08.2015 | Divorce
Candice Curry

I never wanted you here. You simply were never part of the plan. Growing up and dreaming of my family I never included you. I didn't want help from another woman to raise my child. But then you arrived. Dang your kind smile! I was planing on really hating you. I wanted to resent you but you made it impossible.

How to Have the Perfect Stepfamily Holiday

Barbara Goldberg | Posted 01.20.2015 | Divorce
Barbara Goldberg

So, you want to have a perfect holiday. The tree is decorated beautifully. The weather is cold and crispy. The food is cooked to perfection. The only thing missing is...a family that has not experienced divorce.

How You Can Fall in Love With Your Stepmother

Shannon Bradley-Colleary | Posted 01.10.2015 | Women
Shannon Bradley-Colleary

She had platinum blonde hair worn in an Aqua-Net bouffant, thick black eyeliner and a figure Jayne Mansfield would've killed for. At night, she peeled her false eyelashes off like she was undressing her face.

This Personal Account Of Loving A Man With Kids Is Beautifully Relatable

Sarah Humphreys | Posted 12.17.2014 | Divorce
Sarah Humphreys

It is quite a unique thing to open the hatchback of a car to load in your skis and see your future step-children in their car seats, shiny-haired heads turned to check you out, a random woman along for the ride. You try to act casual and cheery, but your voice is shaky and your eyes are wet.

10 Brutal Truths About Being A Stepmom

Lindsay Ferrier | Posted 11.22.2014 | Divorce
Lindsay Ferrier

I would change a lot of things I did as a stepmother if I could go back in time, but I wouldn't give up my blended family.

Move Over, First Families: 'Blended' Families Are the New Game in Town

Beverly Willett | Posted 11.17.2014 | Divorce
Beverly Willett

Ads like Honey Maid's, however, place moms like me and dads like my ex potentially on the defensive, maybe even to be labeled bigots. But why should I ever need to defend myself for wanting to make sure that my children know that their dad is 'Dad' and their mom is 'Mom.'

What if We Could All be Like Brangelina?

Barbara Goldberg | Posted 11.02.2014 | Entertainment
Barbara Goldberg

What if Brad had been a woman who had taken on the responsibility of her man's children? Uh oh! Now, that woman would be labeled a stepmother, and we all know what that means. She would be looked upon as a mistress for the rest of her life.

When a Stepmother Has Her Period

Barbara Goldberg | Posted 10.05.2014 | Divorce
Barbara Goldberg

I see all the stepmothers running to spas and hotels for seven days a month. Then, over time, all of the stepmothers' periods would start to coordinate to the same week each month (The McClintock Effect). Now, the world would be without any stepmothers for one week every month.

Dear Family Whisperer: You Can't Go Home but You Can Grow Up -- Here's How

Melinda Blau | Posted 09.30.2014 | Parents
Melinda Blau

With grandparents staying active and healthy longer, many families are trying to figure out how to have stress-free three-generation gatherings.

It Takes Over a Village: Calling Out American 'Mommyism'

Joel Schwartzberg | Posted 09.15.2014 | Parents
Joel Schwartzberg

I want my daughters to grow up feeling vital and empowered based on what's inside them, not on what comes out. I want my son to recognize women as inherently whole and complete, without regard to their present or potential offspring.

When the Wicked Stepmother Fran Drescher Tells You to Get to Work, Better Listen

Cary A. Presant, M.D. | Posted 06.08.2014 | Healthy Living
Cary A. Presant, M.D.

We all know about the wicked stepmother in the story of Cinderella, and how she orders poor Cinderella to do the cleaning and household chores. The ro...