When in the course of human events a movie comes along that everyone on Planet Earth loves it is a fact universal that criticism will bring about the worst of times. Call me Douche Pile for not understanding that happy moviegoers are all alike.
I wish to apologize to the development team at Four Funnels Entertainment for being such an impatient, easily distracted oaf. This past weekend I learned I am utterly incapable of watching history unfold, particularly if my phone is nearby.
This year, my senior year of college at Wesleyan University, has been filled with many bittersweet moments. As my time here, and my undergraduate education as a whole, comes to a close, I can't help but measure my time in movies.
Some of the finest films in history failed to capture a Best Picture Oscar because of bad timing or an unfavorable climate. Or because a competitor, maybe no better or even far inferior, gained an advantage.