To say that Evil Dead is a film for a specific audience is an understatement. If things like dismemberment and self-mutilation make you queasy -- as they would any normal person -- then you probably shouldn't even visit the same multiplex where this film is showing.
It's not that I didn't like vampires; it's just that I didn't get why a woman would want her life's blood drained away to spend her eternal life with a dead man. Too much like some of my own relationships. Not my idea of romance.
I still have a magnet on my refrigerator that my daughter gave me which says, "My husband has my heart, but my neck belongs to Edward." I wouldn't want to become a vampire -- who wants to spend eternity as a menopausal bloodsucker? It's too violent to even consider.
Bella's character is so inherently weak in terms of personal power, that when she finally morphs into a stronger being, the clothes don't fit. Know why? Because it's not on her terms -- it's on Edward's.
Watch intently as the love triangle between Edward, Bella and Jacob unfolds throughout a slew of amusing comedy sketches, animations, and remixes, including the classic Bad Lip reading, trailer spoofs, emo vampire song, Barking Dawg Paw 2 Petody and, of course, "Jacob, keep your shirt on."
I listened, a little breathless. Tap tap tap. What was it? The fridge churning? The wind rattling the windows? Tap tap tap. Pause. Tap tap tap. Pause. This went on for two or three minutes, something that sounded like a cupboard opening and closing.
Immortality is probably the most appealing part of the vampire mythos -- who wouldn't want to live forever, right? Deneuve and Bowie have been together since the 18th century, and it's clear that Bowie is expecting to spend eternity in a kind of connubial murderous bliss with Deneuve.