Thanks to the advanced technology being used by the IDF, people living within range of Hamas missiles can now stop worrying about being surprised by a rocket attack. They will now get a 30-second warning before a rocket drops. 30 seconds might not sound like much but with effective time management, you can get quite a lot done. Here's a list of things you can do in half a minute or as we like to call it "Gone in 30 Seconds."
• Get an MA degree from the University of Tijuana.
• Sing Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious. At least half of it.
• Play hide and seek with an ADHD kid.
• Send an error report to Microsoft.
• Take a "30 seconds result" pregnancy test. Even if you are a man, actually, especially if you are a man, maybe the rocket won't be the most significant event of your day.
• Cook "Minute Rice." (Warning: it will only be half cooked)
• Watch the all-time highlights of Israel's national soccer team. Twice.
• Quit smoking. Twice.
• Hug the fattest guy around. Sharing is caring - especially if it's rocket shrapnel.
• Go to the window and shout, "I'm sorry I didn't spend more time at the office". It's always nice to refute a cliché before you die.
• Watch 1/120 of CBS's "60 minutes."
• Swim 7 laps in an Olympic pool (only if you are Michael Phelps)
• Change your profile picture on Facebook and then change it back.
• Write a nasty comment about someone's piece on the Huffington Post without really reading the article.
• Watch the most watched clip on "YouTube." (Only if you want to spend your last moments watching an angry squirrel turn his head)
• Learn all the names of the moderate non-violent ministers in the Hamas government by heart - and you'll still have 29 seconds left.
• Get in a big black plastic bag. It won't save your life but it'll make the work of the evacuation team much easier. It's to die considerate.
Follow Omri Marcus on Twitter: www.twitter.com/omarcus