McCain Flies to Atlanta, Proclaims Support for Georgia

Republican Presidential Candidate John McCain interrupted his campaign to fly to Atlanta to show support for the Georgian people. Speaking on the tarmac immediately following his arrival, McCain said: "I always said that if we did not fight them in Saigon, we would have to fight them in San Francisco, but with the Olympics going on, Atlanta is an obvious symbolic target."

Asked what he would do if he were President, McCain said: "I'm not supporting a timetable, but I think the National Guard troops from Georgia should come home from Iraq immediately, and blunt this unwarranted invasion. I have been saying for years that we need to beef up security on the Georgia-Indiana border".

"In the 21st Century", continued McCain, "nations do not invade states. In fact even in the 20th Century, nations did not invade states, although killer bees did invade California".

McCain later tried meeting with Georgia Governor Sonny Perdue, but he was too busy watching President Bush give the US baseball team a few tips. Donning a flak jacket, and with helicopters hovering overhead, McCain took a tour of downtown Atlanta.

"The people of Georgia are great", said McCain, speaking to a group of curious onlookers: "Except for a few complaints about the heat, they are shopping as if nothing had happened, fulfilling my and President Bush's strategy after 9/11. To show I don't just talk-the-talk, but walk-the-walk,I am buying 2 more pair of $520 shoes and charging it to Cindy. Obama may have pitched in to help the flooding in Wisconsin, but, when the chips are down, I'm here in Atlanta to help the people of Georgia".

McCain's talk was interrupted by a phone call from Joe Lieberman, after which he quickly departed for the airport and climbed back on Cindy's plane, with his aides carrying two shoeboxes.