Comics: Coincidence or Conspiracy?

Gather 'round, kiddies, Uncle Paul is going to read the funny papers for you. Come see how the economic disaster is even trickling its way down not only to syndicated comic strips but also to the comic strip characters themselves.

In Candorville by Darrin Bell, a mouselike creature borrowed from another strip, Pearls Before Swine, tells Candorville's protagonist, an easygoing African-American man, "I'm here [in Washington] to testify in Congress comic strip industry bailout hearing, I shall be showered with cash." [see the strip here]

"Don't bother. I tried months ago. We got nothing. The industry's doing worse than ever."

"You just have to know how to work the sympathy angle."

The mouselike creature snaps his fingera, and suddenly Dennis the Menace appears. Apparently he is naked inside a wooden barrel held up by suspenders.

The protagonist says, "The barrel's a little much."

"He's right," says Mouselike. "Take it off, kid."

Dennis removes the barrel and says, "Now I'm cold."

On that same day, In Pearls Before Swine by Stephan Pastis, a strange-looking animal with a bulbous nose is asking the mouselike creature, back in his own strip, "Is it true you're petitioning Congress to bail out comic strip characters?"

"Yes," replies a mouselike companion, "we're an American institution, and with newspapers struggling, our future is threatened."

"Yeah, but how are you gonna get them to give you money?"

"It's all about having the right witnesses presented the right way saying the right things."

And then, in the third panel, there's Dennis the Menace again -- in this strip, his hair is parted on the other side, but he's still apparently naked -- sitting behind a table, facing a congressional committee.

"I can't even afford pants," he testifies.

Next day, back at those hearings, now taking place in the Candorville strip, the chairman is saying, "Mr. Eye, your industry was nearly bankrupt. Dying. We gave you taxpayer money to turn that around. But months later, we see that instead of using the funds to revitalize your failing industry, you used it to buy . . . this can't be right . . . 15 million gold-plated cans of spinach?"

In the final panel, Popeye testifies, "It wuz me contract what mandated I gives meself a bonus. Me hands wuz tied!"

Oh, well. Special interests everywhere, busy digesting money from taxpayers of the future. What are ya gonna do?

Comments

[CVBruce]

I can't believe this. You quote an entire comic strip, word for word, and don't even provide a link to the original? Don't even mention that there is a Candorville website?

[Tovias]

Is there some way that we can get a link to Darrin Bell's website? Instead of lifting the dialogue from his strip and using it to pad an article, why not link to his actual website so we can see this and the rest of his comic strips on this subject.

I think I heard that the cartoonist's potential revenue actually goes up with the more readers that they have to their sites. Seems reasonable to give the guy a link considering you lifted the entire script and posted it here.

[RevBookburn]

Paul Krassner is on target as usual and finding those weird cultural twists that always seem to happen. I can't wait for his next book. Rev. Bookburn - Radio Volta