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Paul Brandeis Raushenbush

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Introducing Ask Pastor Paul: Spiritual Advice For The Real World

Posted: 01/24/2012 12:02 pm

Whatever our religious or spiritual background, we are all seeking to live this life with as much grace, purpose and integrity as we can muster. The real world often confronts us with religious, spiritual and ethical questions that we feel ill-equipped to answer. But don't worry, help has arrived! Ask Pastor Paul: Spiritual Advice for the Real World is the new weekly advice column for your dilemmas of the mind, body and spirit.

Ask Pastor Paul first ran a decade ago and became an Internet phenomenon with thousands of questions coming from people of all faiths and no faith. My hope is that Ask Pastor Paul will again offer practical and sensitive spiritual advice while sparking conversation on real world spiritual issues involving relationships, families, sexuality, mortality, conversion, religious practice, social justice, ultimate meaning and anything else that comes to mind. No topic is off limits!

In my work as a chaplain at Columbia and Princeton Universities, as an ordained minister, and now religion editor, I have developed a respectful pastoral approach to the questions of belief faced by people of all religious backgrounds. Hopefully Ask Pastor Paul will also provide reliable information about different religious traditions and help us to see the common humanity in practitioners of all faiths.

I look forward to hearing from you! Have a spiritual question, ethical dilemma, or religious curiosity? Don't be shy! People of all backgrounds, ages and creeds are encouraged to submit questions to askpastorpaul@huffingtonpost.com.

To give you the format, here are two columns from Ask Pastor Paul that were compiled in a book called "Teen Spirit: One World, Many Faiths."

Dear Pastor Paul,
My boyfriend recently broke up with me because he said God told him he had to. He told me he loves me too much and it's sinful because his mind is always on me instead of God. It's against the First commandment, he says, because his love makes me his idol. I grew up Buddhist and it baffles me that he could make such a decision. Can you help me understand where he is coming from?

Dear Friend,
The First Commandment in the Hebrew Bible (also referenced by Jesus) requires that we love God with all our heart. If your former boyfriend was so obsessed with you that he forgot to love God, then he's right - he is not mature enough to be dating. A real boyfriend is capable of loving you, his family, his friends his neighbor and God all at the same time. I suggest you practice the Buddhist principle of nonattachment and try to be compassionate towards him while letting him go.

By the way, when people tell you they are doing something unpleasant because God told them to do it -- watch out.

Dear Pastor Paul,
I have a little problem. I do not believe in a traditional God. I'm not a pure atheist, but just don't believe in judgment and all that. Anyway, my grandmother is a devout Catholic and cannot be persuaded in any way to go against "The Good Book." My question is this: should I share with my grandmother my religious feelings, or keep them to myself?

Dear Friend,
You should talk about your beliefs with your grandmother, especially if you have a good relationship with her in other areas. Don't start with confrontation and stay away from the Bible if that is the trouble spot. Instead, ask her about her own spiritual and religious journey. Try questions like: When has God been most present in your life?; How would you describe God?; and, What did your mother and grandmother teach you about God? You may never agree with your grandmother, but you will find out wonderful things about her life.

Once you have opened up a more personal interaction you can tell her about some of your experiences, thoughts and doubts. Hopefully she will appreciate how fortunate she is to have an honest and intimate conversation with her granddaughter.

 
 
 

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Whatever our religious or spiritual background, we are all seeking to live this life with as much grace, purpose and integrity as we can muster. The real world often confronts us with religious, spiri...
Whatever our religious or spiritual background, we are all seeking to live this life with as much grace, purpose and integrity as we can muster. The real world often confronts us with religious, spiri...
 
 
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iLdoRight
Encouraging The Rightest Rightness
04:56 AM on 02/01/2012
From my experiences over the last 55 years I would have to say the first sentence in this article only applies to some of the worlds inhabitants and not to all of them.

If anyone wants to find Scriptural or Spiritual answers the best way to do that is to get a recorded copy of the whole Bible on CD collection or DVD or MP3CD from ChristianBook.Com and listen to it all as many times as you can. Eventually almost any question you think of that has an answer related to anything in the Bible will trigger a memory recall about what the Scriptures had to say on the subject, if your memory is working fairly well, and this may be a way to build incredible brain power by creating many more brain nerve connections with which to do "thinking tasks".
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Asal Cliste
Is Feidir Linn
04:14 PM on 01/25/2012
Spiritual advice for the real world? Really? I have never found religion or spirituality to have any connection with the real world.
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GDWhiteman
Christian mystic iconoclast
08:11 AM on 01/26/2012
I can see why you might get that impression. Religions are are a poor excuse for spiritual truth even though they insist otherwise.
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HUFFPOST SUPER USER
TheWM
aka The Wrong Monkey
10:11 AM on 01/29/2012
You're religious although you're constantly insisting otherwise.
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HUFFPOST SUPER USER
TheWM
aka The Wrong Monkey
12:57 PM on 01/29/2012
"I have never found religion or spirituali­ty to have any connection with the real world."

It's not just you. I made a similar comment several hours ago, but it hasn't been posted yet. I guess some folks are tired of hearing. Which is understandable. Who would enjoy constantly hearing that their entire worldview is absurd? Only a few people, I'm fairly sure.
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HUFFPOST SUPER USER
agness nutter
What fresh hell is this?
01:38 PM on 01/25/2012
"God moves in extremely mysterious, not to say, circuitous ways. God does not play dice with the universe; He plays an ineffable game of His own devising, which might be compared, from the perspective of any of the other players*, to being involved in an obscure and complex version of poker in a pitch-dark room, with blank cards, for infinite stakes, with a Dealer who won't tell you the rules, and who smiles all the time."

Gaiman and Pratchett, Good Omens
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HUFFPOST SUPER USER
agness nutter
What fresh hell is this?
01:27 PM on 01/25/2012
I thought this was a joke. It certainly doesn't belong here.
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12:54 PM on 01/25/2012
What happened of my question on Revelations 21:8?
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Hillbilly49
Don't tell me you are a Christian; let me guess.
12:04 PM on 01/25/2012
Christian fundamentalism:  the doctrine that there is an absolutely powerful, infinitely knowledgeable, universe spanning entity that is deeply and personally concerned about my sex life.  



~Andrew Lias
11:57 AM on 01/25/2012
LOL. Fairy tales.
11:38 AM on 01/25/2012
The apostle paul said "Do not go beyond what is written" 1Cor4v6. To tell someone to practise Buddist concepts is going beyond the scriptures. 2Tim3v15-16. John 17v17
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GDWhiteman
Christian mystic iconoclast
08:20 AM on 01/26/2012
And what you wrote matters because ????????

Many of my fellow Christians seem fearful that people might discover that there is both more and less to God than their doctrines and dogma portray.
11:47 AM on 01/26/2012
It matters because as the Apostle John said at 1 John 5v19....the whole world is lying in the power of the wicked one. He also identified that Satan is the ruler of the world. The worlds religions are not from God they are man made and have no scriptural identification as being from God. Jesus fulfilled scores of prophesies about himself helping people to identify him as the promosed messiah that would show obedient mankind the narrow road to life. He said I am the way the truth and the life, no one comes to the father accept through me. Buddism worships many gods and not the true God Jehovah. Psalm83v18KJV
09:20 AM on 01/25/2012
For three hundred years now, the Christian astronomer has known that his Diety didn't make the stars in those tremendous six days; but the Christian astronomer doesn't enlarge upon that detail. Neither does the priest.
Samuel Clemens- Letters from the Earth
12:30 PM on 01/25/2012
Those six days were never said to be 24 hour days.
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12:53 PM on 01/25/2012
Which is a poor excuse and fails even more.

Whether they were 24 hour days or 1 million year days, a day was of specific length. That is, if the first day was 77 years, than the fifth day better also be 77 years,

The universe is 13.7 billion years old. That means a day is about 2 billion years old.

The Earth is 4.54 billion years old.

So by that calculation, it was created on the fifth day.

Yet another Bible fail!
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Asal Cliste
Is Feidir Linn
04:16 PM on 01/25/2012
rationalizations of the faithful.
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Briteleaf
09:02 AM on 01/25/2012
Dear Pastor Paul,
I hear people around me speaking out against the abortion of a zygote and the same folks are very much for capital punishment. What would Jesus say?
09:47 AM on 01/25/2012
I am not PP, but I would say that Jesus would say a zygote is a fancy word for life in the womb. And for the folks who very much want capital punishment-that are too involved in the worlds governments and politics and should work for Gods righteous kingdom (government) which has nothing to do with mankind's governments.
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mommadona
I paint. I blog. Therefore, I am.
05:21 AM on 01/25/2012
Really..... ? *sigh #WhyOrganizedReligionIsTheBaneOfCivilization
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AbrahamSadegh
04:19 AM on 01/25/2012
A Cosmic Dialogue:

LORD Almighty: Jesus it is time for you to go back!

Jesus: Hell, No! I won't go!

LA: What do you mean you won't go?

J: Let me ask you a question? Wasn’t what I called the Second Great Commandment, "You shall love your neighbor as yourself" and did I make that up?

LA: No! The same thing was said millennia before you were born!

J. Thank you LORD! Has humanity learned this simple and common sense lesson during these thousands of years since it was first brought up? Do they need for somebody, anybody, to go and remind them again?

LA: No, you are right. They are no longer children and should stand on their own feet – Billions of them!
This user has chosen to opt out of the Badges program
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12:56 PM on 01/25/2012
Yes, reads just like the fantasy. An omniscient God telling his omniscient kid something he does not know.
03:05 AM on 01/25/2012
Ole' boyfriend took the easy way out.
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c-tom
Badges we don't need no stinking badges
12:02 PM on 01/25/2012
I've heard of the "It's not you it's me" break-up. But the "It's not you , I'ts God" is really original.
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Jamie Dufour
another day in paradise
02:33 AM on 01/25/2012
Regardless of which ever belief or faith you think is truth, can someone please explain why nearly every depiction of Adam & Eve ever made, drawn, sketched, painted, etc....they both clearly have navels (clinically known as the umbilicus, colloquially known as the belly button) ???
12:31 PM on 01/25/2012
So the masters got it wrong....when they are resurrected, and if you are there, you can ask them yourself.
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12:57 PM on 01/25/2012
So he'll never get an answer.

Figures.
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Jamie Dufour
another day in paradise
02:26 AM on 01/25/2012
Mythology confused parents should be held accountable for forcing their children to go to something called church just because it is the parents "faith".

The only way to bring society into the present would be to give each and every human the opportunity to chose as educated adults their spiritual paths...not indoctrinating from birth.
08:08 AM on 01/25/2012
Spoken like a true "Dawkinson". Actually, I believe in God, I am not "mythologically confused", I would be a hypocrite if I did not teach my children my beliefs and when they are old enough to make up their own minds, they can. The "world" teaches children all sorts of things that I may not agree with and they live in the world and form their own ideas, but if I give them no basis for belief in God, then I am negligent as a believer myself.
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GDWhiteman
Christian mystic iconoclast
08:31 AM on 01/26/2012
One would hope that when parents teach children what they believe out of faith, they're also honest enough to admit that 1) although they believe it to be true, they don't know it to be a fact and 2) not everyone agrees with their beliefs and do so without demonizing those who disagree so as to lend a false impression about your beliefs.