Every morning I start my day off with a cup of coffee, staring at a quote that I have plastered across my window. I rock in my rocking chair and think about this quote and what meaning it has in my life. It is supposed to be an encouraging quote; one meant to lift you up. A quote to start off the day on a positive note and to help you keep going when the going gets tough.
Except lately. For as many days as I have looked at and recited this quote, it has become almost a sore spot with me. Lately I have realized a fallacy in my beloved quote. Which, as heartbreaking as it is, is a very needed fallacy.
The quote I have on my window is "Life is a book unwritten. Only your hold the key." However, I have come to realize of late that this is not the case.
Here, let me give you an example.
My husband of 22 years walked out in January. So my future is completely unwritten, right down to my health insurance and the financial part of my livelihood.
Oh and my kids? Well, two of them have taken his side, and one is on mine, so the relationship I have with my kids at this time? Yeah, he controls that as well.
How about my job? Oh, right, he so graciously signed over complete ownership of my business, since it was MY business anyway, so I'm good there.
How about the loneliness that I feel? We all WANT to feel like we are all alone in this world, doing life on our own.
I know I am being a kill joy in this area, but listen up.
The fact remains that WE DO NOT have control over the pen of our life. Instead, we have control of what we do with what is given to us, by whomever. So I am choosing how to utilize what I have been given. I choose to use my job to create happiness in other people. I choose to utilize the material resources I have to help other people. I choose to use the people I come into contact with on a daily basis to brighten their day and make sure they feel worthwhile.
I honestly believe that what some could deem bad or negative, can be used to spread happiness and compassion into a world that could otherwise be negative.
Children are a great example of this. It seems no matter what children face, they are able to find a nugget of goodness in it. I want to be like that. I want to be able to see the good in the horrific, the positive in the utmost negativity. Children will always be the heroes in this scenario.
So until I am able to consistently see the amazing in the not-so-glamorous, then by all means, let the children hold my spot and recognize the fact that it may take me a bit to shed my tainted glasses.