With a bit more family togetherness this summer, there's been a boatload of opportunities for tattling, and hence, perhaps billions of repetitions of my most instructive phrase, "Be in charge of yourself." Clearly it never sinks in.
"Toshia, please clean the bathroom."
"Well, Thomas didn't dust the bookshelf."
"Yes, but since you're the only person you can control, and even that seems a bit dicey most of the time, how about if you forget about Thomas E and just be in charge of yourself."
It's hard enough saying it over and over again to my kids, who I believe will eventually get it, but now I find myself repeating it to the television screen and newspaper bearing the images and quotes from our presidential candidates, who, even if they could hear me, would never make that change, but firmly believe their opponent should.
I've seen ads showing a big huge John McCain face with a voice over saying, John McCain thinks this and John McCain has done that and then a quiet, little vaguely familiar voice says,"I'm Barack Obama, and I approve of this ad."
"Mom, Alley keeps staring at me while I cut holes in the carpet."
"Honey, if you'll be in charge of yourself much of the days work will be done."
Senator Obama, if you're going to go through the phone book telling us who you're not, we're only going to make it to Sheila Baas before the election. You might not have to fundraise quite so much if you'd use your ad space to tell about yourself. Believe me, it wouldn't be politics as usual.
There are only so many hours in a day. All of that time and energy put into finding fault in one's opponent siphons off minutes of quiet reflection about oneself. At a McCain event over the weekend someone asked him why he voted against the Martin Luther King Day holiday for Arizona and he said, "Let me answer that, if I may. Because I was wrong, that's why."
Well, I think many of us suspected that. Do you want to just take a second, Senator McCain, to let us know by what means you reached that conclusion? Do you want to think about it? We'll give you a minute while we just talk among ourselves or play some Beach Boys music or something. Go ahead, take your time. Never mind. We'll ask Barack Obama. Surely he'll know.
"Mo-om, Alley ate the last brownie."
"Thomas E, didn't I tell you to go to bed?"